The New Joke Thread

[IslandHopper]

[LakeSuperior]

I didn't become a surgeon for the money; I didn't do it for the fame either.

I just didn't become a surgeon!

[LakeSuperior]

Having trouble understanding improper fractions?

Our helpline is open 24/7.

[MicHughV]

Getting angry with someone ??
Think before you talk !!

If the person is junior to you, count to 10 and then talk....

If the person is equal to your age, count to 30 and then talk...

If the person is your senior, count to 50 and then talk...

If the person is your wife, keep counting and don't talk....

[socaldmax]

Boudreaux was paddling his pero (boat) down on the bayou and he passed by Thibodaux's camp.
Thibodaux ax, "What dat you got in that pero."
Boudreaux say, "Crabgrass- Me gonna go catch me some crabs, me."
Thibodaux laughs and say, "You fool, you can't catch crabs with crabgrass."
An hour later Boudreaux comes back with a boat load of crabs and show them to Thibodaux.
The next day Boudreaux was paddling his pero and passed by Thibodaux's camp again.
Thibodaux ax, "What dat you got in that pero."
Boudreaux say, "Duck-tape- Me gonna go catch me some ducks, me."
Thibodaux laughs and say, "You fool, you can't catch ducks with duck-tape."
An hour later Boudreaux comes back with a boat load of ducks and show them to Thibodaux.
The next day Boudreaux was paddling his pero and passed by Thibodaux's camp again.
Thibodaux ax, "What dat you got in that pero."
Boudreaux say, "Pussiwillow."
Thibodaux say, "Wait a minute, I'm going with you. "

[socaldmax]

[Montanan]

Sturgis bikers.

[Montanan]

Meanwhile at Home on the Range.

[MicHughV]

the only exercise I get these days is shaking my head in disbelief....

[Tom_F]

[LakeSuperior]

I went to see a dentist. After examining my mouth he said, "There's something wrong with your taste bud."

"What is it?" I asked.

He said, "Well, to start with your shoes are hideous."

[socaldmax]

[socaldmax]

[CatNewBee]

Originally Posted by socaldmax

Open air concerts after Corona imposed measures for social distancing?

[ArmyDaveNY]

Originally Posted by CatNewBee

Open air concerts after Corona imposed measures for social distancing?

Close! Imposed for anti-social distancing.