The New Joke Thread

[HopCar]

Originally Posted by socaldmax

Losers!

Socaldmax, I once spent several hours with Buzz Aldrin. A smart ass kid asked him if the Moon was really made of cheese. Buzz looked straight at him and in all seriousness he said “Sure is, American cheese.” True story. I have never been prouder to be an American.

[ahun]

Do you still believe the media?

[StuM]

Originally Posted by ahun

Do you still believe the media?

I haven't blindly believed the media for many, many years. I've got into the habit of researching outlandish claims.

This is typical of what passes today for journalism. The journalist in question didn't have a clue and conflated two very different statements, mis-interpreting both. The true story:

https://www.peterlawlesssolocircumnavigation.com/

I will be using a sextant and paper charts as my primary navigation tools.
If I am successful, I will be the first Irish person to complete a solo non-stop circumnavigation of the world.

[GordMay]

Originally Posted by ahun

Do you still believe the media?

Do I understand correctly, that you think Facebook is a news media outlet?

[StuM]

Originally Posted by GordMay

Do I understand correctly, that you think Facebook is a news media outlet?

I'd call Ilovelimerick.ie a "media outlet"

[Bullshooter]

I don't blindly believe the media either, but I don't consider facebook or Twitter feeds to be any kind of media I would even consider. Any clown with an account can make up anything they please. At least news media like newspapers and television stations have a stake in their own credibility. They tend to spin things, omit or include things to influence people, but only the fringe media fabricate stories out of whole cloth. "Sasquatch ate my baby" for example.

[goguygo]

Originally Posted by belizesailor

Ha! Would be good to have a practical field reference for provisional fuse replacement. Maybe including various gauges of wire and individual strands of stranded wire.

Went to investigate an electrical issue on a friend's truck once. I was shocked to see literally every other fuse replaced with aluminum foil ! [emoji849]

Sorry, don't know how to embed a youtube link on here (-edit- oh look! did it automatically- cool! ...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aIYkaCAsTyw

[boatman61]

The good looking young couple next door have just made an amazing sex video..

They don't know it yet..

[boatman61]

It's been a tough week..
I bought a memory foam blanket.. now it's trying to blackmail me..

My grief counselor died yesterday..
Luckily he was really good.. I don't give a ****.

I thought PPI was something you got not wearing goggles in the swimming pool..

[GordMay]

If you can't think of the word you want, say: "I forgot the English word for it."
That way people will think you're bilingual, instead of an idiot.

I brought my girlfriend home to meet my family.
They criticized everything she did, mocked her heritage, and gave her a psychiatric disorder.
I guess I shouldn't have insisted they give her the royal treatment.

I hate that SEPTember, OCTober, NOVember, and DECember aren't the 7th, 8th, 9th, and 10th months ...
Whoever screwed this up should be stabbed!

[boatman61]

What do you call a gay T-Rex...
A Dinosorearse...

[ahun]

No, you don't understand it correctly. What I believe is, that ilovelimerick.ie is a media outlet. Not Facebook. Facebook is not a media outlet in my belief. Facebook is only the platform where the link to the aforementioned media outlet was shared.

[dfelsent]

Originally Posted by GordMay

I hate that SEPTember, OCTober, NOVember, and DECember aren't the 7th, 8th, 9th, and 10th months ...
Whoever screwed this up should be stabbed!

They actually used to be, back when Rome had ten months!

[Adelie]

Originally Posted by dfelsent

They actually used to be, back when Rome had ten months!

Yes, he undoubtedly knew that.
The month of July is named for Julius Caesar who was stabbed to death. There's the joke.

[JPA Cate]

Hello everyone, sorry to interrupt the joke thread with business, but there have been some heartfelt complaints relative to political jokes, and as a result 11 posts have been deleted. I know it's hard for some of you, but please just hold back on the political jokes.

JPA Cate, moderator