The New Joke Thread

[Montanan]

Perspectives

[Connemara]

I don't think it's irrational. I think it's transcendental.

Originally Posted by SailOar

Many people think it's irrational to celebrate π day, but like it or not, here we are...

1 3.14% of sailors are pi-rates.

2 Never talk to pi. He’ll go on forever.

3 Come to the nerd side. We have pi.

4 Simple as 3.141592…

5 The roundest knight at King Arthur’s table was Sir Cumference. He ate too much pi.

6 The worst thing about getting hit in the face with pi is that it never ends.

7 What do you get when you take green cheese and divide its circumference by its diameter? Moon pi.

8 What was Sir Isaac Newton’s favorite dessert? Apple pi.

9 What is the official animal of Pi Day? The pi-thon.

10 A pizza has a radius z and thickness a. Its volume is pizza (or pi*z*z*a)

11 What is a math teacher’s favorite dessert? Pi!

12 The mathematician says, “Pi r squared.” The baker replies, “No, pies are round. Cakes are square.”

13 Just saw American Pi. I gave it a rating of 3.14.

14 In Alaska, where temperatures get below freezing, pi is only 3.00. After all, everything shrinks in the cold.

15 What do you get when you take the sun and divide its circumference by its diameter? Pi in the sky.

16 How many pastry chefs does it take to make a pie? 3.14.

17 What do you get when you cut a jack-o’-lantern by its diameter? Pumpkin pi.

18 What is 1.57? Half a pie.

19 What is the ideal number of pieces to cut a pie into? 3.14.

20 How many calories are there in that slice of chocolate pi? Approximately 3.14.

[Jdege]

I don't know why people keep making this complicated.

It has long been established that pi equals three for particularly large values of three.

[StuM]

Originally Posted by Connemara

I don't think it's irrational. I think it's transcendental.

Yes, it's irrational. It is also transcendental. All transcendental numbers are irrational

[boatman61]

1/ Bad spelling looks like this..
2/ The guy at the back is the Supervisor..

[Jdege]

Pi is simply wrong:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5iUh...channel=Vihart

[Montanan]

Part time work.

[GordMay]

[belizesailor]

Originally Posted by GordMay

Ha! Would be good to have a practical field reference for provisional fuse replacement. Maybe including various gauges of wire and individual strands of stranded wire.

Went to investigate an electrical issue on a friend's truck once. I was shocked to see literally every other fuse replaced with aluminum foil ! [emoji849]

[StuM]

[Uncle Bob]

[El Pinguino]

Dunno about Kent but you know what they say about Hampshire men...

'Hampshire born and Hampshire bred,
Strong in the arm but weak in the head.'

[GordMay]

[StuM]

Originally Posted by El Pinguino

Dunno about Kent but you know what they say about Hampshire men...

'Hampshire born and Hampshire bred,
Strong in the arm but weak in the head.'

Be I 'ampshire? Be I buggery! I be come from Fareham!"

[Mickeyrouse]

Originally Posted by owly

I just got my first covid vaccination yesterday, and wrote this bit of humor about the experience. Not a "joke", just a humorous story.... I don't have a Facebook account, and I deleted the actual place names



Dear Facebook Friends:

I got my first Covid shot today at the B__ T_____ Civic Center.......... Frankly I was terrified! The help helicopter was idling in the parking lot of the grocery store across the street waiting to medivac casualties. When I walked in, I was unceremoniously hustled to a table where two burly men held me firmly down as a big nurse with the largest syringe I've ever seen was chuckling evilly as she filled her syringe. The needle looked like a drinking straw.... gazing across the floor of the civic center briefly because I could not bear to watch, I saw paramedics treating a woman who was having convulsions. Another man was getting a epinephrine shot.... his arm swollen to triple it's normal size.... another patient lay twitching feebly on the floor with someone standing over him yelling for a paramedic. The place reeked of piss and **** from terrified people.... the smell of fear. As I returned my gaze to the to the nurse she asked which shoulder......... I said left, and she plunged the huge needle in....... OH MY GOD..... It was like liquid fire in my veins. Beads of sweat stood out on my forehead as I clamped my teeth shut and tried not to scream. I'm not ashamed to say I pissed myself. A red fog descended over my vision, and then everything went black... It must have been just moments. The nurse was holding smelling salts under my nose and slapping my face to bring me out of it..... "can you walk?".......... "I think so"..... With help I staggered over to a chair to wait the required 15 minutes. I was one of the lucky ones........As I left I saw men zipping someone into a body bag, and heard the roar of the help helicopter hauling the lady who had gone into convulsions to B_____ for further treatment.... as another touched down to await the next casualty. The scene was unimaginable........... a veritable hellscape. I dread to think that I will have to go back for yet another shot. Could the disease possibly be any worse than the cure?


HW

Oh, we’re on to herd immunity with THAT. Never let reality mess up a good story.