Freaked me out

[Bobby Lex]

Originally Posted by Papasail

On a steady (long) path to buying a sailboat.
You know when someone makes you doubt yourself, or the sanity of your dreams? That happened to me yesterday...[freaked me out]....
Suggestions? Ideas?

I suggest you put your big-boy pants on. This is your dream, not someone else's. Don't let anyone tell you how to live your dream.

When (or IF) you end up realizing your dream and actually go sailing you will probably experience many many things that will be capable of freaking you out.

However, some old salt's tale, repeated 2nd or 3rd hand, is not one of those things that should freak you out. And if that kind of thing does have the capability to make you doubt yourself, you may not have the fortitude required to live your dream.

It's interesting to note that in real-life emergency/survival situations the single most important factor that affects a good or bad outcome is having a positive mental attitude.

Bob

[rls8r]

Lots of good advice and encouragement here. Several folks have beat me to the punch on what I was going to write. jousset (comment #19) gave you the portion of T. Roosevelt's Citizenship in a Republic speech which has come to be known as The Man in the Arena. Read it again - and have it printed up and give it to the guy who has a brother (keep a copy for yourself in your wallet).

Sailor80 (comment #27) provided a portion of a Mark Twain quote. The full quote is, "Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn't do than by the ones you did. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover."

As my son likes to tell me ..."Dad, there are people who do things, and people who look for reasons not to do things."

So - go back and review the comments and be especially sure to re-read Chotu's Comment #3. Then, go get your boat - adhering to the good advice from others on this thread about taking your time to learn and making good preparations - and enjoy yourself, remembering that attitude is the difference between ordeal and adventure. After all ... a ship in harbor is safe, but that is not what ships are built for.

[Cynara]

Another way to look at is,in the 1960s I started skydiving. Before they did tandom jumps. My roommate was killed skydiving.. i could have quit. I didn't and made my first free fall the next weekend. I knew if I didn't I would never do it. Disappointing only myself

[Enfant Du Vent]

Ahoy Papasail:
You said, "On a steady (long) path to buying a sailboat."

So first let me offer my condolences.


What Others Think:
At 40 I went to HQ, from my field site, to submit my resignation after 14 years

in a very good government job. A few weeks later, a close colleague from HQ

told me, "You certainly were the topic of conversation in the coffee room. Half

the people said 'The man is crazy'. The other half said, 'The man is crazy...but

said it wistfully'."


Tough Times:
I slept through the alarm and ended up on the beach just outside Charleston,

S.C. Getting lifted off by a crane to a flatbed cost me $5,000.00


Was It Worth It:
To leave a safe harbor and make a long ocean passage is to challenge the gods.
But to arrive safely is to sit among them.


PS: The most important piece of safety equipment on board was the 3 x 5 file card
taped over the chart table with a quote from J.M.Synge, "A man who is not
afraid of the sea will soon be drowned, said the old fisherman from the Blasket
Islands, but we do be afraid of the sea...and we do only be drowned now and
again.

[JPA Cate]

@Papasail:

There will always be people around who share their fear, whether or not they mean well. My advice is to understand that it is their fear, not yours. You don't have to wear it. Let it go away, like water off a duck's back. You wrote that you perceive yourself as capable, reinforce it to yourself, this is something you can do. "I am capable; I will solve problems as I come to them."

People vary a great deal in their self confidence, and I will confess that although I present myself as competent, my self confidence is weaker that I would like. Someone, somewhere, might trigger that lack of confidence, yet again, but even that weakness that I perceive in myself, can be made a strength. People will try to make that clear to me, if I let them.

Imho, there are at least two good ways to get into sailing. One is the DIY-A method, where you become involved with a sailing club and crew for a while with a group of skippers. This will allow you to experience a variety of boats and skippering styles, and ultimately you are self taught via your experiences, and your evaluation of them. If you sign up for race series crews, you will sail in whatever weather happens, except for when races are canceled for too much wind; and learn almost by osmosis a little about seamanship. Finally, if you volunteer to help at haulouts, you will learn some about how to organize them, and some about hands on maintenance.

Then, there is the DIY-B method, where you seek out good quality sail instruction via lessons, which will give you a background, and then try chartering. This is far more expensive, although I believe the RYA classes are quite good. Most sailing lessons don't cover "seamanship" because it's hard to define, and is the result of learning to predict the downsides to events before they happen, and avoid them.

Either way, you will learn whether being out on the water is pleasant for you, and whether you get seasick (which, if you do, will be the beginning of your search for what works against it for you). Your own experience will guide you as to whether you want to continue to explore sailing and/or cruising under sail. My Jim used to race his 30 footer solo in the SF Bay Area, and also in crewed races, most of them ocean races.

Someone above wrote "illegitimae non carborundum": it's "bastard Latin" and it means, "Don't let the bastards wear you down." You decide your future. Start small, stay well under budget till you're sure, then go for it. Or not. Your choice.

Ann

[Papasail]

Originally Posted by Cynara

Another way to look at is,in the 1960s I started skydiving. Before they did tandom jumps. My roommate was killed skydiving.. i could have quit. I didn't and made my first free fall the next weekend. I knew if I didn't I would never do it. Disappointing only myself

I had a friend in Nursing School that was a skydiving instructor: split his pelvis on a hard landing/ chute failure at 600 feet. I have already seen (and taken care of) most of the ways people can die. As an ex-marine, I am not afraid, but use an overabundance of caution to help keep things realistic and focused, doing what I can, never to be caught out, or off guard. And that’s saying quite a lot about my mental preparation. “think the best, but prepare for the worst”. This is my odd, yet grinding, upside down version of optimism, which keeps my perseverance fully cocked.

[davil]

"I am not afraid, but use an overabundance of caution to help keep things realistic and focused, doing what I can, never to be caught out, or off guard"

in a nutshell, you got it!!!!

[Papasail]

Originally Posted by davil

"I am not afraid, but use an overabundance of caution to help keep things realistic and focused, doing what I can, never to be caught out, or off guard"



in a nutshell, you got it!!!!

*Island Packet it is….. [emoji6]

[JPA Cate]

Pppppf: Proper Planning Prevents Piss Poor Performance!

Ann




Gosh guys, I AMA

[Papasail]

Originally Posted by JPA Cate

Pppppf: Proper Planning Prevents Piss Poor Performance!

Ann




Gosh guys, I AMA

Didn’t you just get a boat with a saloon?

[JPA Cate]

^^^^^There are differences among folks about whether to call the large open area belowdecks "saloon" or "salon", and I vary my usage. Our present boat is the one in my avatar and Jim Cate's avatar.

[Mike OReilly]

Originally Posted by JPA Cate

^^^^^There are differences among folks about whether to call the large open area belowdecks "saloon" or "salon", and I vary my usage. Our present boat is the one in my avatar and Jim Cate's avatar.

Always thought a saloon included swinging doors, and a bunch of white hats and black hats .

[JPA Cate]

[Don C L]

Rover used to have a car called "3 litre saloon." Where is the saloon in a car?

[Bowdrie]

A "saloon" is where men hang out.
A "salon" is where women get their hair and nails done.
Thus it is, and thus it shall ever be.