Originally Posted by robert sailor
I'm not judgmental generally but over the many years I've been around cruising I have met a ton of single
handers, they are a unique breed and don't tend to attract others to them. I guess this all makes sense as they tend to enjoy their own company much better than others.
To be honest, I am
judgmental. My judgments are most often based on how my experience with a particular place, individual, or thing compares with my own values and past experiences. That's really the only way I've found that works well enough for me (and I say this at age 72, not 27).
To get back to the solo sailing thing (my style for the last 30 plus years), there certainly is
a difference in how solo sailors interact with crewed boats. First off, when it comes to boat management and making a passage
there are obvious technical considerations (starting for example with merely hauling the anchor
and getting going while not whacking another yacht). It just gets more complicated from there on, making repairs
, keeping a good watch, etc. Solo sailors usually want to know how the other person did it, and with what kind of result.
In harbor there are also differences, some of which are related to the "third wheel" idea. I have had many good times and experiences with "he and she" crew over the years, but I'd hazard a guess that two "he and she" crews are perhaps more likely to have things in common than the "third wheel" arrangement. I say this having had many quite close friends of either sex along the way and therefore many quite candid and personal discussions. Still ...
One thing I have noticed that's peculiar to solo sailors (the majority of whom seem to be male, even these days) is that once a solor sailor comes into harbor, he or she really welcomes the warmth of interacting with another compatible human. This has universally been my own experience, as well as the experience of other solo sailors I know well.
So yes, there are differences between single-handers (who only rarely have only one hand) and crewed boats. Yet having what one might call an anti-social nature is not likely one of them. Note that I did not discuss the transition from crewed boat to solo sailor that I've observed often in harbor, while (usually) she exits the boat with duffle bag and he scratches his head