The 2021 -2024 and Continuing Joke Threads

[MicHughV]

interestingly enough, during the years that I was building my boat, I had a " things to do " list of various and sundry projects I needed to tackle...

I don't remember how many items were on that list, but at least two or three dozen...

Try as I might, the list never got shorter..in fact, it got longer. As each new project was completed, I would think of several new one's which were simply added to the list.

I thought I had stumbled onto the secret of perpetual motion.....as that list propagated other lists..." things to buy"...etc...

At the end of the day, the truism that "a boat is a hole in the water into which one throws money"....is the final culmination....it will suck the last dollar out of your wallet....and then proceed to do the same to the next owner..

I wonder if some bright spark on here could tabulate a graph of dollars spent vs enjoyment on water for any given boat...

[jeanathon]

A hillbilly leaves home and goes into the army, but within a week he is back home. Explaining to his folks he said the first thing the army did was to give him a comb then they cut off his hair. Next they gave him a toothbrush, but the dentist pulled out most of his teeth.
When they gave him a jock strap he went AWOL.
Billies hain't dumb!

[GILow]

Originally Posted by MicHughV

I wonder if some bright spark on here could tabulate a graph of dollars spent vs enjoyment on water for any given boat...

Something like this I suspect...

[belizesailor]

.....

[belizesailor]

Originally Posted by GILow

Something like this I suspect...

Attachment 240301

I like that you flattened the fun curve, Its not been my experience that fun increases w increased boat cost.

[HankOnthewater]

another graphical, more detailed view on fun vs cost
- green line is owning a big boat
- purple line when owning a small boat
apologies if the graph below is not funny, I prefer real jokes as well, but am not witty enough to re-tell.

[GILow]

Originally Posted by HankOnthewater

another graphical, more detailed view on fun vs cost
- green line is owning a big boat
- purple line when owning a small boat
apologies if the graph below is not funny, I prefer real jokes as well, but am not witty enough to re-tell.

Nah... those relationships are way too close to linear.

[OutOfControl]

My buddy met an older woman at a bar last night. She looked pretty good for a 60-year-old. In fact, she wasn't too bad at all, and I found myself thinking she probably had a really hot daughter.

We drank a couple of beers, and she asked if I'd ever had a Sportsman's Double? 'What's that? I asked. 'It's a mother and daughter threesome,' she said.
As my mind began to embrace the idea, and I wondered what her daughter might look like, I said, 'No, I haven't.'

We drank a bit more, then she said with a wink, 'tonight's your lucky night'. We went back to her place. We walked in.

She put on the hall light and shouted upstairs: 'Mom...you still awake?

[El Pinguino]

Originally Posted by OutOfControl

My buddy met an older woman at a bar last night. .......

Your buddy? Oh OK if you insist....

Sounds like going to your doctor and asking 'for a friend' about a nasty rash

[GordMay]

[MicHughV]

I've noted that I can go into a "Marine" store and buy a stainless steel bolt for "x" dollars, and walk into the hardware store next door and buy the same bolt for "x/2" price...

There is a misconception, that if an item has "marine" listed on it, that it's better....

it's "better" marketing is what it is...

The Marine Manufacturers have cottoned on to this...." looky here, here comes joe sailor, see dat glint in his eye, dat means we can pull the wool over his eyes, charge him double"....

[OutOfControl]

Originally Posted by El Pinguino

Your buddy? Oh OK if you insist....

Sounds like going to your doctor and asking 'for a friend' about a nasty rash

Ok, I fixed it for you.

My buddy and I met an older woman at a bar last night. She looked pretty good for a 60-year-old. In fact, she wasn't too bad at all, and I found myself thinking she probably had a really hot daughter.

We drank a couple of beers, and she asked if I'd ever had a Sportsman's Double? 'What's that? I asked. 'It's a mother and daughter threesome,' she said.
As my mind began to embrace the idea, and I wondered what her daughter might look like, I said, 'No, I haven't.'

We drank a bit more, then she said with a wink, 'tonight's your lucky night'. We went back to her place. We walked in.

She put on the hall light and shouted upstairs: 'Mom...you still awake?

[belizesailor]

Originally Posted by OutOfControl

Ok, I fixed it for you.



My buddy and I met an older woman at a bar last night. She looked pretty good for a 60-year-old. In fact, she wasn't too bad at all, and I found myself thinking she probably had a really hot daughter.



We drank a couple of beers, and she asked if I'd ever had a Sportsman's Double? 'What's that? I asked. 'It's a mother and daughter threesome,' she said.

As my mind began to embrace the idea, and I wondered what her daughter might look like, I said, 'No, I haven't.'



We drank a bit more, then she said with a wink, 'tonight's your lucky night'. We went back to her place. We walked in.



She put on the hall light and shouted upstairs: 'Mom...you still awake?

Whoa! Thats getting really kinky now...you AND a friend! Mom's lucky night!!! [emoji16]

[Montanan]

A telephone repairman was out on the street; he asked me what time it was.

I told him it was between 8 AM and 1 PM.

[GordMay]