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Old 04-02-2022, 14:17   #1981
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Re: The 2021 & 2022 Joke Threads

moving on from beer jokes, how's about some legal jokes ?


"why don't you ever see lawyers at the beach ?

...the cats keep covering them up with sand"


"what do you call a bigot in a wig ?

...Your Honour"


i'd like to say i'm sorry if i've offended anyone with these jokes...but i really don't think i am...

cheers,
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Old 04-02-2022, 15:48   #1982
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Re: The 2021 & 2022 Joke Threads

What's the problem with lawyers buried up to their necks?


Not enough dirt.




Why don't sharks attack lawyers?


Professional courtesy.
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Old 05-02-2022, 00:58   #1983
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Re: The 2021 & 2022 Joke Threads

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Old 05-02-2022, 03:07   #1984
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Re: The 2021 & 2022 Joke Threads

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Old 05-02-2022, 07:30   #1985
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Re: The 2021 & 2022 Joke Threads

During the mid-1980s dairy farmers decided there was too much cheap milk at the supermarket. So the government bought and slaughtered 1.6 million cows. How come the government never does anything like this with lawyers?
- P.J. O'Rourke
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Old 05-02-2022, 07:41   #1986
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Re: The 2021 & 2022 Joke Threads

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During the mid-1980s dairy farmers decided there was too much cheap milk at the supermarket. So the government bought and slaughtered 1.6 million cows. How come the government never does anything like this with lawyers?
- P.J. O'Rourke

I venture to say if the government decided to kill off lawyers, it would be suicide.
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Old 05-02-2022, 09:46   #1987
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Re: The 2021 & 2022 Joke Threads

Never buy flowers from a monk. Only you can prevent florist friars.
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Old 05-02-2022, 09:47   #1988
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Re: The 2021 & 2022 Joke Threads

Dad, are we pyromaniacs?

Yes, we arson.
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Old 05-02-2022, 09:48   #1989
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Re: The 2021 & 2022 Joke Threads

I’m trying to organize a hide and seek tournament, but good players are really hard to find.
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Old 05-02-2022, 09:48   #1990
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Re: The 2021 & 2022 Joke Threads

I’ve started telling everyone about the benefits of eating dried grapes. It's all about raisin awareness.
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Old 05-02-2022, 19:03   #1991
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The 2021 & 2022 Joke Threads

From my late almost brother in law Sam.
Benny made a deal with the devil. Benny could have all the riches in the world if he never shaved. Downside, if he shaved he would turn into an urn.
Benny had a great life, and fell in love with a beautiful woman. Before the wedding she told him that she wanted to marry a clean shaven man.
What else would you do if you were head over heels in love?
Benny shaved.
Benny became an urn.
Because as we all know, a Benny shaved is a Benny urned.
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Old 05-02-2022, 19:36   #1992
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Re: The 2021 & 2022 Joke Threads

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Old 05-02-2022, 19:37   #1993
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Re: The 2021 & 2022 Joke Threads

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Old 05-02-2022, 22:25   #1994
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Re: The 2021 & 2022 Joke Threads

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Is this West Virginia, Kentucky, or New York?
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Old 05-02-2022, 22:40   #1995
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Is this West Virginia, Kentucky, or New York?
I'm guessing worldwide.
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