Free: Boat Sitting over Winter

[Mike OReilly]

Originally Posted by Iron E

My decision is entirely based on liability. The same reason I wouldn't have someone house sit my home that has a swimming pool.

How is this not a trust issue? You have to trust that a sitter would manage the pool appropriately. For the record, I've sat two houses with outdoor pools.

Originally Posted by Iron E

As far as your link goes, life has taught me that people are generally good. I'm a firm believer that if I were to drop my wallet, I would get it back.

Agreed . But not everyone does (agree).

[Iron E]

Originally Posted by Mike OReilly

How is this not a trust issue? You have to trust that a sitter would manage the pool appropriately. For the record, I've sat two houses with outdoor pools.

I'm using the word "Trust" as presented it in your link.

I can believe (trust) that people are generally good, and I still believe (trust) that a stranger wouldn't be as hyper vigilant or aware of the dangers of the pool. Both can be true.

[Mike OReilly]

Originally Posted by Iron E

I can believe (trust) that people are generally good, and I still believe (trust) that a stranger wouldn't be as hyper vigilant or aware of the dangers of the pool. Both can be true.

You don't trust that a stranger could look after your pool appropriately, but the process of "sitting" is about creating trust. By the time a sit happens, the owner and sitter are no longer strangers.

But one has to be open to that possibility. People with low-trust levels to begin with are going to find it harder to build trust with someone they've just met.

BTW, I don't think the site I cite is measuring whether people think others are "generally good." It is measuring 'the % of respondents replying "Most people can be trusted." '

[JPA Cate]

Interesting about the pool.

When we've house sat -- and we are newbies at it, only two house sits -- the people needing their houses sat approached us very differently. Our first ones took it at face value, we belong to the same sailing club, and would be okay. The man in the couple was pretty rigid with some demands, but it was acquaintance level friendship.

The second one, the man and his wife went overboard to be very friendly to us. Some sailing acquaintances had told them we might be willing to sit their house. The house was very nice, had a small pond, and a fenced vegetable and flower garden, and four chickens with very complicated instructions, and books on chook care provided for our edification, should we care to accept it. They interviewed us very carefully, and provided us with a notebook of the manuals for all the equipment, and a fireplan. We met twice for 2-3 hrs. prior to their departure. They have been yachties and wooden boat festival participants, like us, so they were a good fit. This is also an area where yachtsmen tend to trust one another.

As to need, well, we've sometimes found someone who was willing to keep an eye on the boat while we were gone, run the engine once a month, check the dock lines after a blow, and so on, always other yachties, with whom we were friends.


Perhaps the need for boat sitters is really only among the very small 2% of cruisers who are full time cruisers, and perhaps for those with jobs overseas where they will be away from their boat a long time, and the boat will be safer with a caretaker.

Ann

[Mike OReilly]

Originally Posted by JPA Cate

The second one, the man and his wife went overboard to be very friendly to us. Some sailing acquaintances had told them we might be willing to sit their house. The house was very nice, had a small pond, and a fenced vegetable and flower garden, and four chickens with very complicated instructions, and books on chook care provided for our edification, should we care to accept it. They interviewed us very carefully, and provided us with a notebook of the manuals for all the equipment, and a fireplan. We met twice for 2-3 hrs. prior to their departure. They have been yachties and wooden boat festival participants, like us, so they were a good fit. This is also an area where yachtsmen tend to trust one another.

We've been at the house sitting for many years now, and have had a range of prep experiences. In all cases, we spend a lot of time getting to know each other. Most of it is via text, but we always have at least one face-to-face session, usually via Zoom etc, and sometimes more. It's a chance for both parties to interview the other. It has to be a good fit. People have to trust each other. If it feels wrong, we graciously decline (as we've done a few times).

So there is plenty of regular contact leading up to the actual sit. In all cases, by the time we arrive at the home, we really do know each other. I wouldn't call all home-owners that we've sat for "friends." But they are all good acquaintances, and some are indeed friends.

The fun thing about this lifestyle is that each house comes with different challenges and situations. Some places are easy to learn and manage. Some places are more involved. One farm-sit we undertook required three full days of training, in addition to a lot of pre-study. This place was more complex than any boat I've experienced, which is why I don't buy the, "boat is too complicated" line. It just requires the right person.

Originally Posted by JPA Cate

Perhaps the need for boat sitters is really only among the very small 2% of cruisers who are full time cruisers, and perhaps for those with jobs overseas where they will be away from their boat a long time, and the boat will be safer with a caretaker.

I suspect you're correct Ann. And of this group, a goodly number would rather hire a person than get into a boat-sitting arrangement. But I really do think there are opportunities that would be win-win for both parties. It just hasn't become a thing yet, like it is with house sitting.

[5BTM]

Originally Posted by Mike OReilly

I wonder if some of the negativism from a few people here is based on different local realities. Sitting, in all its forms, is based on trust. It's not based on money, or insurance, or liability. All these things are considerations, but foundationally, it a trust relationship.

There are places in the world where people trust each other more, or less. I suspect in low-trust areas, sitting of all sorts would be a harder sell.

Here's one analysis showing national levels of societal trust.

https://ourworldindata.org/grapher/s...rust-attitudes

That explains my atttude, I come from one of the 20% countries.
However, I would describe it as less naive, instead of less trusting.

[Chotu]

Originally Posted by 5BTM

That explains my atttude, I come from one of the 20% countries.
However, I would describe it as less naive, instead of less trusting.

I was really hoping to see more of a breakdown in that link. I mean, you’re both from the same country. The link doesn’t catch your regional differences. I’ve been to montreal several times. i’ve meet to the maritime provinces. I’d probably be more likely to trust someone from the maritime provinces as they would be to trust others.

and within my country there are great differences as well. I wish they broke it down by province or state.

[5BTM]

Originally Posted by Chotu

I was really hoping to see more of a breakdown in that link. I mean, you’re both from the same country. The link doesn’t catch your regional differences. I’ve been to montreal several times. i’ve meet to the maritime provinces. I’d probably be more likely to trust someone from the maritime provinces as they would be to trust others.

and within my country there are great differences as well. I wish they broke it down by province or state.

To clarify, I consider myself Polish, if I wasn't trapped in a happy marriage and numerous children 9that stole the best years of my life,) I would go back so fast I wouldn't even stop to spit.

[Chotu]

Originally Posted by 5BTM

To clarify, I consider myself Polish, if I wasn't trapped in a happy marriage and numerous children 9that stole the best years of my life,) I would go back so fast I wouldn't even stop to spit.

Oh, i see! well, Montreal has no shortage of very beautiful and nice women. I will give you that. I can see getting “stuck” there. Ha ha. Makes sense. The situation gets even more complicated with immigration. Who is to say what country on the list someone is from? Depends how much they have adopted local culture.

also I think trust like this is passed down from generation to generation. my ancestry, Irish and Norwegian, a couple generations back, came from some fairly dark green spots as well. They are the ones that probably taught me to trust others. I also grew up in New England where you could trust others for the most part.

[dlj]

It just occurred to me that I boat sat a number of years ago. I was living/sailing the North coast of Spain and one day I sailed back into my home port and there was this beautiful sailboat there with a flag that I didn't recognize. Turns out it was the Icelandic flag. The owner and I chatted, became friends, in the way that sailors do... He was looking for somewhere to keep his boat for a bit less than a year. He worked full time in Iceland and was sailing down the coast of Europe spending a number of years doing so. He would sail, find a place for his boat, go back to work then return the following year to keep sailing.

I found him a mooring close to my boat. I then kept a watch over his boat for that almost year he was back working. He had told me I could take it out sailing anytime I wanted, but I felt that to be a bit too much so I simply would go to the boat checking the bilge, lines and such. She was a custom built boat and really lovely! I think we did go out sailing her together but I'm not 100% sure of that. In any case when he returned the boat was in perfect condition - as it should have been. We spend a few days together as he and his friends prepared to head out. A few months later he sent me a huge package of home made lox that his father had smoked from fresh caught salmon. Best lox's I've ever eaten!

No money involved. I had found him a mooring ball that was owned by someone that was off sailing for a few years so his mooring ball was available. Everyone was happy!

dj

[Mike OReilly]

Originally Posted by 5BTM

That explains my atttude, I come from one of the 20% countries.
However, I would describe it as less naive, instead of less trusting.

It's probably a good approach in your country. There's a reason why some areas score low and some score high. I'm sure it's based on reality.

[Mike OReilly]

Originally Posted by dlj

It just occurred to me that I boat sat a number of years ago. I was living/sailing the North coast of Spain and one day I sailed back into my home port and there was this beautiful sailboat there with a flag that I didn't recognize. Turns out it was the Icelandic flag. The owner and I chatted, became friends, in the way that sailors do... He was looking for somewhere to keep his boat for a bit less than a year. He worked full time in Iceland and was sailing down the coast of Europe spending a number of years doing so. He would sail, find a place for his boat, go back to work then return the following year to keep sailing.

I found him a mooring close to my boat. I then kept a watch over his boat for that almost year he was back working. He had told me I could take it out sailing anytime I wanted, but I felt that to be a bit too much so I simply would go to the boat checking the bilge, lines and such. She was a custom built boat and really lovely! I think we did go out sailing her together but I'm not 100% sure of that. In any case when he returned the boat was in perfect condition - as it should have been. We spend a few days together as he and his friends prepared to head out. A few months later he sent me a huge package of home made lox that his father had smoked from fresh caught salmon. Best lox's I've ever eaten!

No money involved. I had found him a mooring ball that was owned by someone that was off sailing for a few years so his mooring ball was available. Everyone was happy!

dj

Lovely story DJ, and a great example of the kind of relationship that "sitting" entails.

[GordMay]

Perhaps, those of us, who are less trusting of others, are merely projecting our own lack of trust-worthiness, on to others.

People always perceive the world around them through the lens of their own experience, context, and emotional state.

In psychology, 'projection' refers to placing your own negative traits, or unwanted emotions, onto others, usually without reason.
Like a lot of aspects of human behaviour, projection comes down to self-defence; which protects you from having to acknowledge parts of yourself, you don’t like.

On the other hand, people who can accept their failures and weaknesses, and who are comfortable reflecting on the good, bad, and ugly within, tend not to project. They have no need, as they can tolerate recognizing, or experiencing, the negatives, about themselves.

[Chotu]

Originally Posted by GordMay

Perhaps, those of us, who are less trusting of others, are merely projecting our own lack of trust-worthiness, on to others.

People always perceive the world around them through the lens of their own experience, context, and emotional state.

In psychology, 'projection' refers to placing your own negative traits, or unwanted emotions, onto others, usually without reason.
Like a lot of aspects of human behaviour, projection comes down to self-defence; which protects you from having to acknowledge parts of yourself, you don’t like.

On the other hand, people who can accept their failures and weaknesses, and who are comfortable reflecting on the good, bad, and ugly within, tend not to project. They have no need, as they can tolerate recognizing, or experiencing, the negatives, about themselves.

I wanted to post this but thought I would get ganged up on and beat up. Lol.

I think this is actually the case.

Also, part of who people are is the culture they were raised in and live in. It’s kind of a feedback loop.

[S/V Illusion]

Originally Posted by GordMay

Perhaps, those of us, who are less trusting of others, are merely projecting our own lack of trust-worthiness, on to others.

People always perceive the world around them through the lens of their own experience, context, and emotional state.

In psychology, 'projection' refers to placing your own negative traits, or unwanted emotions, onto others, usually without reason.
Like a lot of aspects of human behaviour, projection comes down to self-defence; which protects you from having to acknowledge parts of yourself, you don’t like.

On the other hand, people who can accept their failures and weaknesses, and who are comfortable reflecting on the good, bad, and ugly within, tend not to project. They have no need, as they can tolerate recognizing, or experiencing, the negatives, about themselves.

Or some people simply understand the liabilities involved. Having seen and helped resolve such cases over many years, it’s hard to have the naive view that it’s all about perception.