Cruising and live aboard with 4 kids. Is it possible?

[JPA Cate]

It isn't whether or not it can be done. It can. However, that's not the real question, which is can this particular family do it. And that can only be answered by them, and especially the parents. There are solutions to the home teaching problem, if you have enough money, hire a tutor, who will live and cruise with you. That person must have an entire cabin to him or herself. A tutor or nanny could free up caretaking time for other activities. If not in the budget, well, then, somebody has to do it, it is work that MUST be done.

It is a lot of youngsters to maintain, and teach, and a wide age range. The cruising environment is an excellent one for children, providing both parents are up to it. We did meet two ill behaved sailing kids one time. The parents failed to offer disciplinary guidance. All the rest of the cruising kids we've met have been super.

It depends on the people involved. The father is right to feel concern. Most likely, he and his wife will share singlehanding the boat, and the child care, if it will work. I believe the schooling is another core issue, right after time management and boat safety.

Ann

[TrentePieds]

You are such a realist, Ann. I salute you ;-)!

But that said, I think we could help this family to make sound judgments about the viability of their hopes. I say "hopes" advisedly, because on the basis of the one post from one member of the family, no counsel we can offer can be more than perfunctory. For good or for bad.

So why don't we ask Smart555 flat out: What boat are you hoping to get? And respecting your need for privacy in such matters, what sort of budget are you contemplating for 1) the purchase of the boat, 2) the equipping of the boat and 3) boat maintenance expenses for the first year of cruising and 4) consumption expenses, including educational expenses, during the first year of cruising?

And Smart555: If you are willing to address those topics within the bounds of propriety you will be able to get an enormous amount of guidance from this forum.

The "hopeless romantic", TP ;-)

[Ivansgarage]

Originally Posted by CapnBazza

I think you’d be nuts to try but if not and you did try you’d soon be nuts.

Tow the dingy.
Kids get the dingy,
Adults get the boat.

[JPA Cate]

Originally Posted by TrentePieds

You are such a realist, Ann. I salute you ;-)!

But that said, I think we could help this family to make sound judgments about the viability of their hopes. I say "hopes" advisedly, because on the basis of the one post from one member of the family, no counsel we can offer can be more than perfunctory. For good or for bad.

So why don't we ask Smart555 flat out: What boat are you hoping to get? And respecting your need for privacy in such matters, what sort of budget are you contemplating for 1) the purchase of the boat, 2) the equipping of the boat and 3) boat maintenance expenses for the first year of cruising and 4) consumption expenses, including educational expenses, during the first year of cruising?

And Smart555: If you are willing to address those topics within the bounds of propriety you will be able to get an enormous amount of guidance from this forum.

The "hopeless romantic", TP ;-)

I'm as much a romantic as anyone who has spent my last 3o+ years in the way I have! The younger me was once quoted in a newspaper as having said, "I love adventure!" This was before the trip SF-HI, and return in the 30 footer. I wouldn't say that today, that much of a realist am I.

Cheers, TP,

Ann

[Nikki S]

As someone said, check out facebook pages: kids4sail and also "Liveaboard Sailing Families (with Kids)". there's also worldschoolers. you will get a lot of first hand accounts of different peoples experiences.

We lived aboard with 2 kids for 2 years on the east coast of australia and met a number of families of various sizes and nationalities, living aboard for various amounts of time on a variety of boat types and sizes, some sailing locally and some the world. My kids are 10 and 13. The 10 year old wants to go back to school, and my husband wants to go to work, and I can't deny them that, but I love living aboard and didn't mind the challenge of homeschooling and secretly hope they all decide they want to liveaboard again in a couple of years, and sail further afield. Everyone's experiences are different, as are their expectations of what type of boat, budget and experience they need. If you really want to do it, you'll find a way regardless of your budget or sailing experience.

[crankysailor]

The question for us is not if we can do this (family of 2 + new born) but rather, what choice do we have? A life inmersed in a world of fake news, fake friends and fake pursuits. A fake reality.. or a life “out there” and to show our kids the world before it is gone.

Is there really a choice to make?

IMHO if anything, you have waited too long.

Best of luck with whatever you decide. But yes I know it is possible like anything else. You just have to believe it is.

[Benz]

Ever since we outgrew our boat and moved off, the kids have done nothing but plan to return to cruising. Ours were 5,3 and 9months when we left CA on our 31-footer. We lived aboard for 5 years, and it was the best thing we ever did.
As for homeshooling: remember that it takes less time, with personal attention, to teach one child something than to teach 24 or 30 of someone else's kids the same thing. Our communist public school system has got to be the most inefficient education scheme in the world. Our kids are all avid readers (the most important goal of education, IMO), have been to 12 different countries, have experienced many of the places they would otherwise have to write a boring report about in high school.
While caring for the little ones while underway is a more than full-time job, schooling is the least of your worries if you're just a little literate and not too lazy.
Blog is in the signature.

[Kenr74]

Originally Posted by wrwakefield

They also published a book: Voyaging with Kids in case that is of interest...

Buy this book. It is fantastic. (I have no vested interest)

[B00B00]

You will have your hands full thats for sure. We are doing it with 3 kids, all boys aged 5, 7 and 9. All going well so far but it is a lot of work.....
It can be very challenging and frustrating but im pretty sure your kids will be better for it.
I lived on a boat as a kid with a family of 7. Allthough it was quite cramped (45ft classic gaffer) we all loved it and all the brothers have salt in their veins. Every one of us 5 boys currently own our own yachts now.

Hows the budget? I would say thats a pretty important factor. Dont try and skimp, it can be an expensive game....

[Smart555]

Originally Posted by JPA Cate

Really, it depends on all the people involved. Cruising isn't for everyone. In your case, with a baby, there will be extra burdens on you as skipper (the only other adult aboard will be doing child care when the baby's awake) and on the mother, usually, who gets stuck with the child care, and misses out on the fun stuff.

There are good home schooling programs, who will bear the burden of being the teacher? That person cannot adequately be a watch keeper during the education hours, and especially with the baby needing time, at the same time as the other 3. Do you guys feel good about being the teacher? 12 is almost into the teens, and good education will mean more difficult subjects to teach.

Are you all pretty independent?



Ann

Thank you for response!

What do you mean asking about independence?
Actually we often change our life-style and try something new and our kids used to it. They quickly get accustomed to changes.
Also I’m my live time I started I running different business projects from scratch!

Couple years ago we made big changes in our live left everything and moved to USA from another country with different language, different hemisphere and etc.
Our kids started go to school here not knowing English at that time and now after three years they’re speak fluently and learn successfuly, get honor roll awards and adopted to this school system.
So our family is not afraid of changes.

Of course we doubt that we could be good teachers for them. My wife and I have master’s degree in our country and many another skills, but education programs it’s different !

On the another hand we understand that this experience can be very useful for then and open their mind!

We have this dream ,but if we keep waiting another 20 yehars we don’t sure live up our dream ever!
Anyway we have opportunity return for shore live after couple years or early.

[Smart555]

Originally Posted by SailsWithFists

Of course it is possible. It all depends on the total dedication of the family involved, the overwhelming desire to solve personal problems together, and the knowledge to realize that all perceived obstacles are nothing more than opportunities to grow.

Too many people set themselves up for failure because they do not believe in themselves or their desires. They ask negative questions: "Can I...?", "What if...?", "I don't...?", or worse, they make negative statements: "I can't...", "but my family does not agree..."

Anyone can find a reason not to do something, or why something will not work. Only the strong willed can push beyond the barriers of society, normalcy bias, personal beliefs, and self-doubt.

If you do not think you can do it, then failure is your future. But if you KNOW that you can do it, then look forward to great success, because you are the type of person to overcome and persevere in the face of adversity.

Thank you for good and motivated advice !

[Smart555]

Originally Posted by 2big2small

All the children we ever met that grew up on boats were so incredibly nice and independent that we decided we wanted ours to grow up cruising too. Not only can it be done, but it should be, in my humble opinion. Don’t let anyone disuade you. For all the practical questions there is a facebook group called kids4sail.
(A catamaran is nice but you get a lot more for your money with a big monohull. If your budget doesn’t permit 200k for the initial purchase price then you’ll have to choose a monohull anyway. That’s about the minimum price for a small used catamaran.)

Thank you!

We agree that cat would be the best option for us , but in budget for purchase around 200k it’s difficult to find multihull in good condition.

[Smart555]

Originally Posted by TrentePieds

The Regal Express is a power boat, I believe? Do you have any experience in sailing vessels that you can use as a jumping off point?

TP

We have boating experience during 3 years , but we don’t have sailing experience right now!
We chartered 44’’ catamaran with capitan couple times and try learning little sailing !
We have read some book about theory of sailings
Af corse we understand it not enough and when we get our boat going to hire capitan to teach us!

[Smart555]

Originally Posted by fatherchronica

I regret not having dragged my kids aboard and leaving. We waited until they were gone, and since then I have met many cruising kids, and 97.6% of them seemed better adjusted and happier than my kids seemed to me. Of course I may have been a terrible parent, and it would have seemed worse if we were stuck on a boat together. The cruising kids we meet though do not have cell phones in their hands 24/7, and that is probably a big plus in their being interested in the world at large, and creating their own happiness not reliant on how many "friends" they have in the cyber world, or whether their meals are worthy of posting. Go now, in my opinion, before the 12 year old thinks it will ruin his or her life to be dragged away from their friends.

Thank you very much!
We totally agree about cyber world. It difficult to be controlled and if not kids stucked playing iPads too much wasting time watching stupid things.
We also thought about waiting them to be grown and gone... but in our case it more 20 years.

[Smart555]

Originally Posted by TrentePieds

You are such a realist, Ann. I salute you ;-)!

But that said, I think we could help this family to make sound judgments about the viability of their hopes. I say "hopes" advisedly, because on the basis of the one post from one member of the family, no counsel we can offer can be more than perfunctory. For good or for bad.

So why don't we ask Smart555 flat out: What boat are you hoping to get? And respecting your need for privacy in such matters, what sort of budget are you contemplating for 1) the purchase of the boat, 2) the equipping of the boat and 3) boat maintenance expenses for the first year of cruising and 4) consumption expenses, including educational expenses, during the first year of cruising?

And Smart555: If you are willing to address those topics within the bounds of propriety you will be able to get an enormous amount of guidance from this forum.

The "hopeless romantic", TP ;-)

Thank you for our answer!

We have budget around 250-270k
We think from this money boat purchase should be about 200k
Whit think about monohul in size 46-50’’ with 3 stateroom.
We looking in our budget for Beneteau or Jeanneau 46-49 but maybe it’s better options for us see some older and little bigger or some type of motorsailer?
Upgrade , maintenance and repair another 20-25k and 40k for the first yeah of cruising!

Maybe we are little wrong with number and you advise is appreciated !