Can non-drinkers be cruisers?

[Juho]

Originally Posted by SV Bacchus

1. You are recovering

vs

2. Religious reasons

or

3. You just don't like the stuff

Or maybe just because

4. Life is the best drug

[Lepke]

There are many non drinkers or light drinkers. You don't notice them because they're quieter. When I cruise I sometimes raft with friends. We may start on one boat, but the drinkers and non drinkers, in time, migrate to separate vessels.
For me, smokers are a bigger issue.

[anacapaisland42]

ABSOLUTELY, but, forgive us drinkers, Clamato with a teaspoon of hot horseradish is a perfect cockpit sipper, just tell people you're allergic to alcohol or take a homemade dish.....that's also great!
I rarely offer alcohol to an unknown person, try something that they can take home to their family and look like a hero. We swapped chicken for fish in the Hobies ....much appreciated by people who live on fish ....we also swapped 6 cans of Spam for 6 nice lobsters...but that's another memory.

Originally Posted by ransflyer

As we study sailing and cruising, my wife and I are more excited each day to buy a boat, outfit it, and sail away. But we don't drink. Is it possible to be real cruisers, if we don't consume alcohol? Everywhere we turn it seems that booze is an important part of the scene.

There are lots of related questions as well. Here are a couple starters:

1. When invited to dine on other boats, we can only bring another dish to share rather than wine. Is that rude?
2. When we invite others aboard, can we politely explain that we prefer to be an alcohol free boat? What is a good way to say this?
3. When visiting remote locations, it's polite to offer the chief a gift. What are good alternatives to a bottle of liquor?
4. Is soda pop an acceptable option for some or all situations?

Feel free to suggest other potential situations/questions and answers.

While this won't stop us from exploring the world, it seems that it's an important social issue that we haven't seen discussed and we'd like to be prepared.

Thanks in advance for your help.

[jmschmidt]

Very difficult but possible.

[Juho]

Originally Posted by ransflyer

Answers differ a lot in different countries, but here are some comments anyway.

1. When invited to dine on other boats, we can only bring another dish to share rather than wine. Is that rude?

No. Anything goes. Bringing something else than a bottle is more difficult. But maybe people will appreciate some more personal, carefully thought, or maybe self made products. People used to bring even flowers. Why not today too. I recommend stuff that will be consumed, not other more permanent small stuff that will eventually fill the boat.

2. When we invite others aboard, can we politely explain that we prefer to be an alcohol free boat? What is a good way to say this?

Yes. Being straight forward is the best way. For example if you have kids around, and taking part in the party, that's one good enough reason. Another sensible one could be your personal preferences . You can also say "no gifts please".

3. When visiting remote locations, it's polite to offer the chief a gift. What are good alternatives to a bottle of liquor?

This depends a lot on where you are. For example in many places in the Pacific gifts to the chief shows great respect to the local way of life. Check wth locals what gifts are considered nice and what not.

4. Is soda pop an acceptable option for some or all situations?

Depends. Not necessary the best option for a formal dinner. In the Pacific I have brought toilet paper (in addition to some other useful stuff) to the local chief .

[Mazu]

This is not at all difficult. I don't drink and I cruise. If your a program person AA is on most islands In the Caribbean. Most local non drinkers will be more than happy to pick you up and take you on a tour. If your in the program then you understand the camradary. Especially in the islands. They will go out of their way to help you out. I cruised and just did my own thing. I don't mind others drinking but you have those who don't know when to stop so when it gets too much or too loud...well it's time to say goodnight. And think how much more money you'll have in your pocket. Alcohol is a a pretty big expense. Go for it and enjoy.

[TJ D]

We don't drink at all, either. I've been cruising for a bit over 20 years, about half of it sans booze.
(Our reason for deciding not to drink was all of the boozing in the cruising world that you mention-We saw WAY too many otherwise good people go off the rails on the alcohol consumption. Alcohol has interfered with a lot of cruising dreams for sure.

I'd say that it has some social costs. For most people, alcohol is a very good social lubricant, and I think that friendships come easier after you've tipped a few with someone.

Also, I think that drinkers often view non-drinkers with a bit of suspicion, surprisingly. Maybe it makes them self-conscious about their own intake.

So, I would say that we have less friends in a given anchorage now than we did during our drinking days. A lot of this is that we tend to leave gatherings earlier than we used to, and we don't really get invited over to other boats quite as much as we did back in the day. Drinking's a big part of socializing, as I mentioned, so when you don't partake, often the invitations are lacking.

That's not to say that we don't have plenty of social interaction, but we do have a little less nowadays. We're actually perfectly fine with that-we like our own company, too. And the dog, of course.

So, I certainly wouldn't be concerned about getting out there as a teetotaler. You'll do fine without the hooch. You definitely won't be an outcast, but you may not spend as much time visiting other boats or having people visit you if alcohol's out, all other things being equal.

No biggie, though. Enjoy.

[AZUS]

Let's face it we cruisers are generally pretty weird...wonderful alright, but sill weird. Your non-drinking status is weird, but a fairly benign variety compared to the rest of us out there.

If you wanted to make it easy for yourself, you might decide that you will not drink, but let others do what they wish. That would let you invite people to bring their own cocktails for sundowners, and even let you gift an occasional bottle of wine without ever partaking yourself.

Your choice of course, but no one will think twice about your preferences if you have a live and let live attitude particularly.

[ArmyDaveNY]

I like to go out once in a while, such as lunch, happy hour, and the evening, but I have plenty of friends who don't drink much or don't drink at all. All my friends are welcome regardless of their drinking or not drinking. If you let me know in advance, I will make sure I have a beverage you enjoy such as apple juice, water, soda, etc.

Anyone who insists that you drink is likely not worth hanging around. There are even days where I don't drink (please don't spread that around) and on those occasions I don't want to be pressured either.

On a similar note, when I invite new acquaintances I hope they will let me know if they have any special needs with regards to food. I will do my best to accommodate them, especially if it is an allergy.

[ohdrinkboy]

Live and let live. Just let me know upon invitation if no alcohol is allowed on your boat. Conversely if you are on my boat, I'll drink as much as I want.

[Lihuedooley77]

What do you do on land, at your home, out to dinner with friends, going to other peoples homes for parties and good comradeship ?

If you don't drink, we respect that, and because we love our non drinking aand drinking friends, it makes absolutely no difference.

We will have a drink of alcohol and they will have non alcoholic drinks.

So bloody what ?

Do we get stupid with booze, no, we do not. One or two drinks is good for us .

On board , we do not drink booze underway, we wait until anchored or moored or docked.

As to being invited over to a neighboring vessel for sun downers or boat drinks, and talk story, just tell them that you would love to come over, but you do not drink and will bring your own non alcoholic beverage, and " Can we bring some snacks for everyone, do you need any ice, etc.

Have a good time.

We had dear friends when we lived on Kauai, FOR TEN YEARS, and we would go out together for dinner, once a month, Erica and I would have drinks, they would not, and we paid no attention to their preference of no alcohol. It never entered the conversation, period.

We were having a great time with them, and loved them.

If booze is such a priority, that any one would put you down, or belittle you over that choice, you don't need them as friends. Since alcohol is primary with them, not friendship. Alpha Mike Foxtrot.

I did not read thru all of these responses, but a lot depends on your own personal attitude about people who do have a drink . It that bothers you, then you are part of the problem and are free to make your own choice in life as to who you associate with.

Now, we do have a problem with drugs, and that is not our style, so we stand well off when it comes to that situation. Too much real life to be lived, real adventures, and real relationships to experience and be aware of.

Friendship is precious cargo

Life is Adventure

so Live your dream, it will all work out if you want it to.

[CarinaPDX]

Originally Posted by SV Bacchus

Can we know why? For instance, if it is:

1. You are recovering

vs

2. Religious reasons

or

3. You just don't like the stuff

Another is medical reasons. I was a moderate drinker (typically a couple of sundowners) until a heart attack. It turns out that modest quantities of alcohol can drive serum triglycerides through the roof for those of us with familial hypertryglyceridemia (normal range 50-150, measured at time of the heart attack at 1044!). Some who know better than I think medical costs resulting from drinking exceed those from smoking. I can attest that my cruising budget goes a lot further these days...

Anyway, as a result I have not had a drink since I left the hospital in Turkey more than 14 years ago. My cruising friends remained friends, although it did take a while to get some of them to stop pushing drinks on me and accept my decision. I don't think it changed things much socially; I was never part of the heavy drinking crowd anyway. But it was easy because I was happy to pour drinks for my friends and reduce my own copious stocks which no longer were of use to me. It is rare that someone expects you to pay for their alcohol habit when you do not partake yourself, at least directly. I have had awkward situations where some wanted me to "just split" the bill for dinner, where alcohol was half the cost - I am quite insistent to pay my own separately and rarely get further pushback.

I would suggest that the OP might reconsider allowing cruisers to BYOB; cruisers are a live-and-let-live lot, and to some it may feel coercive to prohibit their consumption of their own drinks on your boat (will you not sit with them in a cafe if they have a beer?). This is just the nature of religious beliefs, and in any event you will not likely be interested in socializing with those who value drinking over your company so the choice may not have much real world impact. Cruisers, as in the real world, are varied: some will be your friends, some won't, no matter what you do. Just be yourself and you will find your place.

Greg

[flymike]

No. . .

[hamburking]

I don't drink. I especially don't drink on the boat. I sail with my kids, or sometimes alone. I can't think of any time that I would want less than 100% of my mental ability. The anchor can drag. There can be a medical emergency. When alone...well, drinking alone is just sad, not to mention dangerous.

To be clear...the only alcohol you'll find on my boat is the stove fuel.

BUT I understand what you are saying. Drinking seems to be the sport of sailors. I crewed on a friend's boat and we crossed the atlantic with 2 other guys (crew). It turned out to be a 4000 mile booze cruise, and I was the designated driver. We brought more booze/beer than fresh water. Seriously, these guys were drunk every single day. I'm surprised nobody died. When we arrived in Antigua, there was even more boozing. Their motto in Antigua is: "my drinking island has a sailing problem".

I invite lots of guests aboard my boat. I offer them exactly what I drink...a tepid bottle of water (from my usually warmish icebox)....but hey...I'm no slouch...I bottle it myself!!!

[Variant]

Yes I dont drink or do drugs while operating a boat or any other vehicle. Many users here will disagree as many of them are borderline drug/alcohol abusers as discovered in a previous duscussion. Which boat are you buying?