Sexist Views...

[aclmck]

Originally Posted by DiverChick71

How many other girls feel like they get treated differently when they are dealing with a marina or boat yard or other marine-related company?

I made a phone call today to ask some questions about materials I need to order for a boat repair. I'm not at all bashing the guy that helped me, he was very helpful and seem genuinely to want me to have success in my project. I would rate my customer satisfaction with the call very high. But he asked me, "Do you have someone to help you with this?"
Hmmm. How am I supposed to take that? I wasn't being particularly clueless. I was asking about different ratios for epoxy thickening and if I should use fillers, etc.

So I just wonder if he would have had the same approach if my boyfriend would have called and asked the same questions instead of me? He flat out said he's never had anyone ask him if he had "someone to help him" even when he's talked to a shop owner about a totally foreign subject and been completely clueless.

At any rate, it's a moot point because I'm way too much of an involved party to let him make my phone calls, I wouldn't be satisfied with the answers he got, even though they would likely lead down the same path. But I'm curious if anyone else feels they are treated differently because we are the fairer sex.

It is possible your looking TOO hard at this,as someone that sold these type of products,it was a common question to ask, if answered truthfully , it gave me an idea of how in depth i need to explain the use of certain products.

always found women to be truthful, explained the use carefully and had little problems,but some of the guys would pretend to know, then come storming back to demand a refund when used wrong.

Always found that the females had done their homework well and had normally chose the correct product for the job at hand,not so the fella's also found that the girls listened intently and asked if not sure.

i prefer to have a female explain something to me on something i know nothing about as they rarely miss a vital step,they are normally precise and do not offer opinions when not sure they will check to validate what they say, generally the fella's just guess if they don't know.

[zeehag]

when the guy gets the talking to a kindergartner voice i figger he isnt considering me to be viable as a human being...and i begin to grow a nice case of attitude......

[shebakescakes]

Originally Posted by Ocean Girl

I worked at west marine for a few years in my twenties. I was pretty good at everything except electronics( hate em). Sometimes, when a customer was sent over to me to get some questions answered, the customer would round the corner and come up short, look down at me waiting to help him, and look back and around confused over the surprise. in their defense, I was pretty darn adorable It usually didn't take long to get them up to speed. Sometimes they'd go back to a guy to get a "second opinion", the guys would come over and ask me for the answer . And I cannot tell you how many times at west marine I've passed the phone to a guy saying " they need to talk to a man" To be fair I've gotten that treatment from a few wives too.

I've been in your shoes as far as working at West Marine, and it did annoy me just the slightest bit when the men decided that I didn't have the information that they needed. Their loss as far as I'm concerned.

[kthoennes]

Every time a discussion like this comes up I'm reminded of one of my favorite moments in the annals of sexism. I was waiting in line at the Chrysler Jeep Eagle dealer in Anchorage, Alaska. Beautiful young women in front of me was paying a bill for a tune up. Service guy says, "and this is a charge for spark plugs. Spark plugs are little things that spark to make the gas go boom in each cylinder." She replied, "Oh, gee, thanks for letting me know that. I'm a jet engine mechanic for the F16's at Elmendorf Air Force Base and I assumed cars ran with turbines like our jets."

[Mike OReilly]

I think the sexism found in the sailing and cruising community is really no different than that which exists in society in general. It's been an old boys club since the dawn of "yachting". Like in the rest of society, it is diminishing, if not quite dying out. The "old boys" are getting older. Thankfully, I rarely hear condescending terms being used by my age group, and it gets even better with the younger crowd. We still have a ways to go, but it is getting better.

One thing I will say is that women are not the only target of sexism. Sexism is a prejudice that affects everyone. My partner is a better helms person, navigator, and is at least as useful as me in the engine room. Do you know the verbal abuse I suffer every time I hand the tiller over to my partner so she can do the difficult docking?!? Ann does the oil change this time, and my manliness is called into question. If I defer to my partner's commands I'm subtly abused for being somehow less of man.

I'm not saying it's equal -- women are pummelled harder, no doubt about it -- but both sexes suffer under the abuse of sexism. Happy be the day when we can put this idiocy behind us.

[Coops]

Another instance which is very common is the guy not wanting to look dumb and sends his wife/girlfriend in to ask the questions or to get a part that he does not know the name of. It happens more than you think.

Did like it once when a young lady asked for some outboard oil. The salesman said" two or four stroke?" She asked "Is there such a thing as a one stroke?" I told her 'Yes, it's called a man." She smiled, "I've got one like that" she said. Next time they came in together he could not work out why we all smiled.

Coops.

[sartorst]

Well personally I would have never asked anything I would have just pretended to know. you know a sign of weakness! like asking some one for directions when your lost. SORRY HA HA, MEN ??

[delmarrey]

It's stereotyping.
90% of woman out there no nothing about boats or industrial jargon. So most men, and women treat women as if they know nothing, which is usually the case. I consider it an honor to meet a woman that can stand up to the industrial labors. But they are far and few from existing.

As a young man I searched hi and low for a gal that could work and play along side me and share common interests. But that was a lost cause. So I ended up with one that allows me to go out on my own w/o conflict.

As a Machinist I only met one woman that worked in a machine shop and yet she was still only doing production work. But I have met a couple welder/fabricators, as well as my Mother during WWII.

It's a rare thing to see a woman get her hands greasy let alone have callous hands. Most are into beautification and dress up attitudes. Then comes food and cute things. It's in the program.

[Coops]

You best go get fitted for the flame suit now.

Coops.

[aclmck]

Originally Posted by delmarrey

It's stereotyping.
90% of woman out there no nothing about boats or industrial jargon. So most men, and women treat women as if they know nothing, which is usually the case. I consider it an honor to meet a woman that can stand up to the industrial labors. But they are far and few from existing.

As a young man I searched hi and low for a gal that could work and play along side me and share common interests. But that was a lost cause. So I ended up with one that allows me to go out on my own w/o conflict.

As a Machinist I only met one woman that worked in a machine shop and yet she was still only doing production work. But I have met a couple welder/fabricators, as well as my Mother during WWII.

It's a rare thing to see a woman get her hands greasy let alone have callous hands. Most are into beautification and dress up attitudes. Then comes food and cute things. It's in the program.

You need to get out more here in Australia, they perform most tasks that men do,carpenter,plumber,electrician fitter,mechanic,heavy machinery operators(in fact most of our mines appear to want women to operate machines over men) obviously the "program" stuffed up here it must be in the water or something

[evm1024]

Originally Posted by DiverChick71

How many other girls feel like they get treated differently when they are dealing with a marina or boat yard or other marine-related company?

I made a phone call today to ask some questions about materials I need to order for a boat repair. I'm not at all bashing the guy that helped me, he was very helpful and seem genuinely to want me to have success in my project. I would rate my customer satisfaction with the call very high. But he asked me, "Do you have someone to help you with this?"
Hmmm. How am I supposed to take that? I wasn't being particularly clueless. I was asking about different ratios for epoxy thickening and if I should use fillers, etc.

So I just wonder if he would have had the same approach if my boyfriend would have called and asked the same questions instead of me? He flat out said he's never had anyone ask him if he had "someone to help him" even when he's talked to a shop owner about a totally foreign subject and been completely clueless.

At any rate, it's a moot point because I'm way too much of an involved party to let him make my phone calls, I wouldn't be satisfied with the answers he got, even though they would likely lead down the same path. But I'm curious if anyone else feels they are treated differently because we are the fairer sex.

Absolutely treated differently. Reminds me of when my first daughter was born. There was a house full of women, my wife and my new born daughter. Every time I got a chance to hold her some woman come over and took her from me. Many saying "Here let me take that baby."

It was really pissing me off in the end. I just wanted to hold my daughter.

They were all well meaning but sexist as hell.

For what is is worth I change diapers better than my wife, cook better that her or her mother and can epoxy better too.

Regards

PS My mother-in-law asks me to show her how to cook. And once or twice in Ukraine she had me show her friends how to make crapes.

[delmarrey]

Originally Posted by Coops

You best go get fitted for the flame suit now.

Coops.

Fear no fish. ><))))º>

[neelie]

Originally Posted by rebel heart

Old white men and their view that the only people can do anything right are other old white men.

Bwahahaha.....

Welcome to the Cruisers Forum.

[brin]

Well, maybe in USA it is different, but here in the middle of Europe (Czech republic), we don't make a big deal from this. Actually a man asking a woman politely, if she had any help would be polite responded that probably yes or no and if no, if he had any recomendations. We respect our women in what they do, and they respect us (men) in what we do. And I believe most of men (and women) in our country sees it this way. STOP MAKING IT A BIG DEAL AND YOU WON'T FIND YOURSELF IN AWKWARD SITUATIONS. Sue someone because he opened you doors is idiotic.

[Wraith_Mac]

Originally Posted by aclmck

You need to get out more here in Australia, they perform most tasks that men do,carpenter,plumber,electrician fitter,mechanic,heavy machinery operators(in fact most of our mines appear to want women to operate machines over men) obviously the "program" stuffed up here it must be in the water or something

I was going to send a 'thanks' thing for your post but decided I'd go public on this as well.

I fully support your above statement and so does my wife, it really must be a location situation, thankfully distant from the parts of Australia we inhabit and where we travel a lot.

She is a very competent mechanic, licensed boat driver, computer literate as well as being an academic [sociologist and anthropologist] mother of 3 and very beautiful.

She has never been treated with disrespect or disdain when ordering parts for our cars or boats, good parts people can identify their customer's skill and arrogance levels very quickly. Gender doesn't come into that.

Our sympathy to those who suffer from any of the ....isms out there, we have a couple of problematic ones here but sexism has not been one so far.

Whether it be in the farming, fishing, rec. boating or professional spheres we have moved in in Australia sexism as described here has been non-existent.

Here we appear to presume more often that a person performing a task is competent and whether that presumption is continued is based on skill level exhibited, not gender.

Someone, somewhere in Australia will surely have a different view, but individual, isolated examples are not a cohort, but the above view/experience is ours.

Cheers,
Mac