Why do cruisers quit cruising?

[thomm225]

Originally Posted by Kinkircating

This is actually a subject that I've studied closely over the past few years and discussed directly with those out doing it or who did it. Here are my findings from these conversations:

1) It is only one of the partners dream, having both be on the same page it crucial, and more importantly you get along when spending all of your time together.

2) No breaks/spending nearly 100% of your time on the boat. Those who are successful I've found a common trait to be getting off the boat a few times a year for a month or two.

3) Money - leaving young and needing to return to work or leaving later but buying too much boat for the money you have saved then having to consider money at every turn. Money is going to be a consideration, but if you have to even think about $ if you need to replace a sail or heaven forbid go to that beach bar and have a burger & beer for dinner, you probably should not go cruising.

4) Boat is just too damn slow or have to motor too much- This is one that was mentioned by almost every single couple I spoke with that quit, they hated that they had a big heavy slow beast of a boat that needed 20knots of wind to sail and it took the fun aspect out of the actual sailing part of it. Also on the flip side those who are still out there doing it have switched over to boats that can sail in light wind and make faster than average passage times.

5) Health - the common theme was "I wish I would have started sooner" Cancer, arthritis, hell you name your ailment, I heard or read them all. There is a balance of going too late and too soon, but nobody regretted going.

6) Not being able to afford a nice boat - this sort of goes along with 3 & 4, but was a common theme that if you were on a boat that is just one notch above camping and it was constantly breaking (more so than the normal 50% of the time lol), it was a recipe for cruising not lasting very long. Keep in mind I'm not talking about the 20- and 30-year-old somethings out there vlogging, I'm talking about the 40-50 somethings that made a go of it with what they had.

7) Bad seamanship - this is sort of a catch all, but Captains who yell or don't get along with their crew, sailing out of season, not picking proper weather windows, in-ability to perform even basic boat repairs. Lack of experience prior to starting. Lack of confidence is also a biggie here.

8) Family - kids having grandkids or parents aging drew some back.

9) Turns out you just are not that into it after all once you got the taste.

I'm sure I omitted a few items, but it was super important when my wife and I started down this path to set us up for success. Even with all of that, life happens when you are busy making plans. Good stuff to keep in mind though.

4 and 6 are pretty strange reasons to want to quit cruising.

First off ALL monohulls and large cruising cats are slow.

As far as needing 20 knots that's pretty crazy. Most old heavy boats perform pretty well in 8-10 knots and start hitting their stride at 15-17 knots

As far as things breaking that just breaks the monotony of cruising and gives you something to do.

One thing though I have found is that having some fun DIY electronics onboard can make things more interesting.........

I definitely don't believe in selling your house to go cruising though and plan to get off the boat every few weeks and get a nice hotel room and catch up on rest, eat good meals, wash clothes, buy some books, etc. if I ever do cruise long distance

[boatpoker]

Have not stayed on land more than 3-4 months total in the last 30yrs.
Have never been bored. We have no desire to interact with dirt people
or ever be anywhere but on the water.

[thinwater]

There are a lot of things I wouldn't want to do forever. They move on. For me, the problem is the many things that cruising is NOT compatible with. There is more variety in my life on the hard. But that is up to you.


A great many (and nearly all of the people on this forum) people maintain sailing as a part of their life for their entire lives, but that is not cruising, and they know that.

[Shrew]

This seems kind of obvious, doesn't it???

Young people largely return for money, or to chase a different dream.

Middle-aged people are a rarity because most focus on careers and family. Even those that do go, money and /or family become a deciding factor.

Retirees: Health, stability and mobility eventually cause them to come back home.

In all three groups, will be a faction that found it was more work then the palm trees, rum drinks in coconuts, and hammocks that they dreamed about.

[wingssail]

Originally Posted by Kinkircating

This is actually a subject that I've studied closely over the past few years and discussed directly with those out doing it or who did it. Here are my findings from these conversations:

1) It is only one of the partners dream, having both be on the same page it crucial, and more importantly you get along when spending all of your time together.

2) No breaks/spending nearly 100% of your time on the boat. Those who are successful I've found a common trait to be getting off the boat a few times a year for a month or two.

3) Money - leaving young and needing to return to work or leaving later but buying too much boat for the money you have saved then having to consider money at every turn. Money is going to be a consideration, but if you have to even think about $ if you need to replace a sail or heaven forbid go to that beach bar and have a burger & beer for dinner, you probably should not go cruising.

4) Boat is just too damn slow or have to motor too much- This is one that was mentioned by almost every single couple I spoke with that quit, they hated that they had a big heavy slow beast of a boat that needed 20knots of wind to sail and it took the fun aspect out of the actual sailing part of it. Also on the flip side those who are still out there doing it have switched over to boats that can sail in light wind and make faster than average passage times.

5) Health - the common theme was "I wish I would have started sooner" Cancer, arthritis, hell you name your ailment, I heard or read them all. There is a balance of going too late and too soon, but nobody regretted going.

6) Not being able to afford a nice boat - this sort of goes along with 3 & 4, but was a common theme that if you were on a boat that is just one notch above camping and it was constantly breaking (more so than the normal 50% of the time lol), it was a recipe for cruising not lasting very long. Keep in mind I'm not talking about the 20- and 30-year-old somethings out there vlogging, I'm talking about the 40-50 somethings that made a go of it with what they had.

7) Bad seamanship - this is sort of a catch all, but Captains who yell or don't get along with their crew, sailing out of season, not picking proper weather windows, in-ability to perform even basic boat repairs. Lack of experience prior to starting. Lack of confidence is also a biggie here.

8) Family - kids having grandkids or parents aging drew some back.

9) Turns out you just are not that into it after all once you got the taste.

I'm sure I omitted a few items, but it was super important when my wife and I started down this path to set us up for success. Even with all of that, life happens when you are busy making plans. Good stuff to keep in mind though.

All of these reasons are true and valid, but most if not all could be anticipated before one starts cruising.

The underlying problem, in my opinion, is that people don't know what they are getting into. Many people, including people who go into it with a short term cruising plan, have an unrealistic image in their minds about what cruising will be like, and they ignore the realities which should be obvious from the onset.

Then they set out with great anticipation, only to have the realities hit them in the face. The net result is that it is just too hard, not that much fun and too many other things stand in their way.

The solution, if there is a solution, is for people to do more sailing, lots more sailing, before they commence "cruising". And then only go cruising if they find that they really like it.

Live on the boat for a few years, sail it every week, take all your vacations on the boat. If you pass that test, then you are ready to full time cruising.

Otherwise you will be really lucky if it turns out that you like it and can stick to it.

[NorthCoastJoe]

We have a one year plan. Cruise FP for a year and at the end of that year, keep going or return to work a little.

The biggest issue for us is Health Insurance. Anyone know any good international health care providers?

[Sailor Sailor]

Originally Posted by Kinkircating

This is actually a subject that I've studied closely over the past few years and discussed directly with those out doing it or who did it. Here are my findings from these conversations:

4) Boat is just too damn slow or have to motor too much- This is one that was mentioned by almost every single couple I spoke with that quit, they hated that they had a big heavy slow beast of a boat that needed 20knots of wind to sail and it took the fun aspect out of the actual sailing part of it. Also on the flip side those who are still out there doing it have switched over to boats that can sail in light wind and make faster than average passage times.

6) Not being able to afford a nice boat - this sort of goes along with 3 & 4, but was a common theme that if you were on a boat that is just one notch above camping and it was constantly breaking (more so than the normal 50% of the time lol), it was a recipe for cruising not lasting very long. Keep in mind I'm not talking about the 20- and 30-year-old somethings out there vlogging, I'm talking about the 40-50 somethings that made a go of it with what they had.

Wow, that seems really scientific and all, like a real survey. So what is your solution for the problems to ##4 and 6? What kind of boat should people buy?

[wingssail]

It are those with unrealistic ideas about cruising who change their minds the soonest. And that is because they just don't think it through.

Originally Posted by Kinkircating

This is actually a subject that I've studied closely over the past few years and discussed directly with those out doing it or who did it. Here are my findings from these conversations:

1) It is only one of the partners dream,Judy and I shared this dream from the start. You should know if your partner shares your dreams. Get real. Don't force it.

2) No breaks/spending nearly 100% of your time on the boat. We rarely get off the boat. Why would we want to? I like sleeping in my own bed. If you need to get off the boat, maybe you shouldn't get on it.

3) Money A sound financial plan is essential. We tried but were wrong and we had to go back to work, but we never gave up the cruise; we worked as we went. Now days there is more financial information available. Be realistic

4) Boat is just too damn slow or have to motor too much- You would learn this if you sailed more before you left.

5) Health - the common theme was "I wish I would have started sooner" People need to go earlier, while they still have health. Unfortunately health issues cannot always be anticipated. This is one problem which is largely up to luck and genes

6) Not being able to afford a nice boat Reality must be faced. Either you have enough money for a boat you can be happy in or you need to work more and work harder to earn enough. Again, if you did a lot more sailing on that boat before you set out you'd know if it was going to be sufficient.

7) Bad seamanship -You will discover if you have the seamanship skills and personality to operate a vessel and command crew by gaining years of experience.

8) Family - kids having grandkids or parents aging drew some backMost people know what relationship they need with their families. They should be honest with themselves about this..

9) Turns out you just are not that into it after all once you got the taste.This is the truest statement of all. And you cure it by getting a taste of cruising long before you go "cruising"

I'm sure I omitted a few items, but it was super important when my wife and I started down this path to set us up for success. Even with all of that, life happens when you are busy making plans. Good stuff to keep in mind though.

[wingssail]

Originally Posted by Sailor Sailor

Wow, that seems really scientific and all, like a real survey. So what is your solution for the problems to ##4 and 6? What kind of boat should people buy?

People should do a lot of sailing before they select a boat, maybe years of it. If you are asking Internet forum what you should do or how much it will cost you don't know enough. You are not ready. Far from it.

If you select a boat and go now, it is just luck if you'll like it and stick.

[wingssail]

Originally Posted by NorthCoastJoe

We have a one year plan. Cruise FP for a year and at the end of that year, keep going or return to work a little.

The biggest issue for us is Health Insurance. Anyone know any good international health care providers?

There are many, but they are expensive.

We chose to cruise in third world counties without medical insurance, and used local medical providers which we could afford. If a major medical issue arrises we'd fly back to our home country and use the national facilities there.

If a real medical disaster happens, and you can't fly home, you then have to dig into your cruising kitty and pay it (you'd better have one), but in third world countries, you probably can afford it.

Our monthly medical expenses for 10 years was less than $300, with no insurance coverage.

Attachment, sorry about the format

[thinwater]

Originally Posted by Shrew

... In all three groups, will be a faction that found it was more work then the palm trees, rum drinks in coconuts, and hammocks that they dreamed about.

If avoiding work was the motivation...

1. Kinda stupid.
2. Not much of a life anywhere.

The most telling factor is that everyone responds to this thread differently.

[LakeSuperior]

Two years cruising, Lake Superior to Europe and back, was awesome. But cruising is very one-dimensional. It's all you do.

So on return from the two years we reverted to 3 to 4 weeks per year aboard cruising and lots of day sailing. Consider that we only have 3 good months per year of sailing on Lake Superior.

After two years aboard it took another two seasons to get my leg strength back for skiing and hockey. Cruising tends to turn your body to jello IMHO.

[myketch42]

I to have given this a lot of thought . I always feel a little melancoly when I hear of another sailor giving up on the dream . When summering thru hurricane season one year in Trinidad I remember a number of times that the men at the poker or bridge or Mexican Train , games , would comment on their desire to continue to more far reaches , confident in their hard won voyaging skills developed over the previous years., when questioned with , why not ? A shrug never really answered the question . Latter at the local laundry I got my answer while overhearing the women talking about their exciting new future plans . The perfect house .... close to grandkids , and all the trapping land life supplies , they had given their spouse the promised 5 years and now it was their time . Fair enough I say , but never my life plan.

[Wilyum]

Originally Posted by Kinkircating

4) Boat is just too damn slow or have to motor too much- This is one that was mentioned by almost every single couple I spoke with that quit, they hated that they had a big heavy slow beast of a boat that needed 20knots of wind to sail and it took the fun aspect out of the actual sailing part of it. Also on the flip side those who are still out there doing it have switched over to boats that can sail in light wind and make faster than average passage times.

This is one of the biggest considerations I need to figure out, while I agree on every point you make here, ex. going fast and sailing in light wind, comfort that comes with a heavy full keeled boat is going to have to be my highest priority. Nothing will put an end to the dream faster than the wife not being comfortable on passage or at anchor.

[Mike OReilly]

A number of people have keyed into the OP's #4: "Boat is just too damn slow or have to motor too much...". This really makes zero sense to me. Surely anyone who has bought a cruising sailboat understands that sailing is pretty much the slowest way to go anywhere .

If someone only discovers this AFTER having bought a cruising boat, then clearly they did not even do a modicum of research before making the jump. This means certain failure, if not on this aspect, then something else. This person will not last long.

And no boat I'm aware of needs this fictitious "20knots of wind" to move well. Not even very heavy ones. I should know (look at what I sail ). Anyone who claims they need 20 knots clearly doesn't know how to sail. Either that, or they have an exceedingly poor boat, or are severely under-canvassed.

Comfort is a very different that speed. Everyone needs to be comfortable, although what that means for different people can vary quite a lot.