I love living on our boat, my husband hates it.

[Chotu]

After being single for a couple years (and married for 10 many years ago) and still seeing someone I care very deeply for who simply isn't ready for any relationship or dating in her life right now...

I'm wondering if it's even a good thing to have a life partner as compared to having different people fill different roles. Like different ones for love, for friendship and for sex.

Oddly, cobbling together a few different people to fill these roles seems to work incredibly well. You get all the space you need to yourself to do what you want, you get space to work on personal and professional projects, you get all the sex you want (mostly), you get a feeling of belonging and love, you get close friendships. And... Each of these people fills their role better than any one person ever could because you picked them specifically because it was such a good fit for that particular role.

If I've learned to accept anything from studying Buddhism, it's that nothing is permanent or forever, so putting all your eggs in one basket isn't always the best idea. Nor can one person be perfect. It's nearly impossible for one person to fill all those roles well. It's also impossible for me to fill those roles for someone else. It's like coupling leads to either acceptance of lower quality role filling or to unhappiness that one of the needs isn't being met.

Odd, but this is where I am right now

[MicHughV]

As a sailor I've been down this slippery slope many times and there is surely a jumbled carnage of broken hearts left in my wake.

But....when the right one comes along....it changes everything !!!

[boatman61]

Originally Posted by MicHughV

As a sailor I've been down this slippery slope many times and there is surely a jumbled carnage of broken hearts left in my wake.

But....when the right one comes along....it changes everything !!!

Nice to be so sure you leave broken hearts in your wake.. I often often wonder if it's relief I leave in my wake..
Relief I/they moved on early enough to retain enough affection to remain friends.

[MicHughV]

Boatie, for sure, there were some that took a giant weight of my shoulder once they departed..one can never tell what lurks behind those pretty blue eyes...

[boatman61]

Originally Posted by MicHughV

Boatie, for sure, there were some that took a giant weight of my shoulder once they departed..one can never tell what lurks behind those pretty blue eyes...