Married but sailing alone

[Classicsailboat]

My wife liked day sailing and limited coastal cruising, but had no interest in a big trip like the ICW and definitely no offshore. I explained this to a sailing friend who did not know my wife and his advice was "get a new wife".

My wife was a keeper, but now we have no boat.

She would have done the ICW but fortunately I recognized that she had to want to do it or it would spoil the experience for me and probably our relationship.

I have seen several couples who split up over this issue and I did not want that. I have done a lot of armchair sailing since on the various forums, and now believe that for us this was the best decision.

THINK IT THRU.

[reed1v]

Take up golf instead.

[Musicaltrees]

I was a lake sailor for a very long time. Our first date was on the sailboat. I proposed on the sailboat. Our honeymoon was on the sailboat. My long term passion to cruise was made crystal clear from day 1. Then suddenly her interest in sailing waned but she was cool with me taking trips here and there. I bought a boat on the coast and started planning our adventures. It came down to choosing her or the boat. I chose the boat. To forego my lifelong dream of cruising would turn me into someone who I am not . Some people seem to work it out… But it's always best if you share the same passions I feel. Best to you!

[jeepbluetj]

Originally Posted by reed1v

Take up golf instead.

So true. There has never been any marital disagreements about golf.

[reed1v]

Originally Posted by jeepbluetj

So true. There has never been any marital disagreements about golf.

Think Tiger Woods would disagree. Depends on the hole and the ball.

[TheThunderbird]

It makes me feel sad.

Ask yourself how much you love her..

I am single live aboard, but I met a woman I could keep boat dry 7 months in the winter, for her....

[CaitB]

My spouse a falconer and to get him to leave his hobby would be impossible. I travel a lot - alone - with no issues. He definitely is not a sailor and not a salt water guy and in fact, doesn't swim. I live going to Mexico, Australia and Bali to surf and several years ago I took off for a lengthy trip to Tibet to climb. We've been married 13 years with no issues...

[Goosebumps]

Sailing alone in tropics you meet beautiful if not exquisite native beauties, going native will risk your marriage but honesttly who here can honestly say never having been tempted.

[jenders]

To: Skipmac, My partner suffered severe seasickness on our way down the West coast from Anacortes to Baja and beyond. She tried a number of remedies, including pills and patches. We eventually found bonine (generic meclizine) which helped her a lot. Might look into that. Good luck.

[reed1v]

Originally Posted by CaitB

My spouse a falconer and to get him to leave his hobby would be impossible. I travel a lot - alone - with no issues. He definitely is not a sailor and not a salt water guy and in fact, doesn't swim. I live going to Mexico, Australia and Bali to surf and several years ago I took off for a lengthy trip to Tibet to climb. We've been married 13 years with no issues...

A life insurance policy sure helps sweeten the parting.

[Celestialsailor]

I had been unattached (un married) for 15 years. I just recently re-married. My wife, Nancy is a horse person...I am not. She enjoys the boat in port but has little desire to sail any more than in protected waters. We worked out that she comes and goes as she pleases with her friends via horse. It is also understood that my time is spent (usually 1/2 a season) on the boat, working and sailing her. It's nice not having to rent the house out anymore and someone taking care of things.
My former wife was onboard with my hobby at first but soon after marriage told me...'thanx for the house and you have your boat thing'. We divorced a year later. I have been sailing a long time. That said, I have a few other hobbies. Some day I will give up sailing for one reason or another. My goal is to live my dreams and live the life i have left to the fullest.

[reed1v]

So there. Choice is between love of wife or love of boat. Personally I prefer the warm, comfy embrace of my dear wife at night, rather than opting for a material possession. But then, some folks prefer material items as the reason for living.

[TheThunderbird]

A Catalina 25 swing keel is not the best way to treat your spouse with class and style, maybe... isn't it!?

Sorry Man, I don't want to sound derogative. Indeed, I am sad..

Ask yourself How Much you love her, and possibly quit yachting for a while. You can always catch back on yachting, hardly so on a relationship..

Best!

[reed1v]

Originally Posted by TheThunderbird

A Catalina 25 swing keel is not the best way to treat your spouse with class and style, maybe... isn't it!?

Sorry Man, I don't want to sound derogative. Indeed, I am sad..

Ask yourself How Much you love her, and possibly quit yachting for a while. You can always catch back on yachting, hardly so on a relationship..

Best!

got to agree with you. Now if he was leaving her for an Oyster, then go for it; but a junkie Catalina? The man has not tastes.

[PlumKrazy]

This really is something that concerns me. My wife wants to travel the world, but she seems to only want salt on her food. I haven't been able to figure out the best solution yet, but what I've read here gives me hope.