Married but sailing alone

[Rainh2o2]

Just wondering, how many people here are married but the significant other doesn't want to travel? Do you sail without her anyhow? I'm talking long 6-8 month or more trips? Our relationship is such that it would probably actually work for us since I was in the military when I was younger and we would spend up to a year apart, but I was wondering how many others do it?

[maxingout]

Sailing has always been a family activity for us, and I don't see that changing any time soon. We now live in a Skype world with internet connections world wide. So sailing alone is different now than in the past. You may be single handing, but you aren't exactly alone as you can easily stay in contact multiple times each day.

[Stu Jackson]

Originally Posted by maxingout

but you aren't exactly alone as you can easily stay in contact multiple times each day.

'cept for the hugs...:smitt en:

[a64pilot]

I'd say maybe a better plan if possible is you do the passages, and she flies out to your destination


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[maxingout]

If I was going to plan a trip with an absentee spouse, I would choose destinations that were so awesome that she would fly to each one and meet me there. Australia and New Zealand are good examples where a flight would be worth it as there is so much to do in those destinations.

[SimonV]

Originally Posted by a64pilot

I'd say maybe a better plan if possible is you do the passages, and she flies out to your destination


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Over the years I have seen this, but they seemed to be the ones separating or divorcing. Or he ends up selling the boat.

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[lifeofreilly57]

My first wife was OK with local sailing, sort of, but hated any offshore sailing, so I would sail single handed or with a pal to the destination and she would meet me there, I also had a great sailing dog back then who loved going along. Now that I think of it, he was better company while sailing. I got to sail, she got to see many new places.
A while after we were divorced (not due to boat issues) she mentioned in a conversation how much she missed being on the water and wished she had taken advantage of it more often when she had the chance. Go figure.
I met my second wife (we're now married long term and will be) at a sail race on Nantucket, she had crewed on a race boat for 14 years. I can tell that it's much easier and more enjoyable to have a wife who shares your interests and passions, of course now we have to flip a coin to see who's captain on any given day.
If your happy in your marriage and want to continue to pursue your travel plans you might want to take the suggestion of one of the earlier replies and have her meet you at your destination if possible. If this works for you and your wife, it's a doable compromise, it worked for me for many years.
You didn't say if she didn't like to travel on the boat or if she just didn't enjoy traveling to distant locations in general, which would definitely make finding a solution to your problem a bit more difficult.

[Sandero]

Only up to a week... like delivering the boat from NY to Maine...

[Steven UK]

My wife and I are having these discussions right now, she has no interest in sailing with me but wouldn't hold me back either. She likes to travel so she'll be meeting me via other means (airplane). Win win deal...!

[skipmac]

Originally Posted by Steven UK

My wife and I are having these discussions right now, she has no interest in sailing with me but wouldn't hold me back either. She likes to travel so she'll be meeting me via other means (airplane). Win win deal...!

Same situation and plans here. Wife likes to travel, even likes being on the boat and sailing but gets seasick if it gets rough.

[JPA Cate]

^^^^Knowing you're going to get seasick can really put a damper on your enjoyment, especially when it has been time after time, and you don't like throwing up.

You might ask her if she would consider using Stugeron, (cinnarizine HCl) what Jim and I use. it is the only thing that works for me with no side effects. If she is game to give it a go, do what you have to to get some for her to try. You can, I understand, get it mail order out of Canada, and also in Mexico. It is also otc in Great Britain and Vanuatu.

There are other things that work so-so for me, PM me for more, if interested.

Ann, who was once seasick for 19 days in a row, and never for long after that

[groundtackle]

I was reading about Stugeron and it apparently causes a substantial risk for Parkinson's disease. Anyone know anyone who has connected their use of this drug to later symptoms of Parkinson's? Sorry about the tangent, not really trying to hijack.
My wife and Is not keen either. Not sure how I'll make it work but for now I'll stick to shorter trips in the PNW, maybe try a trip to Alaska in 2017.
One step at a time.
Nick


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[JPA Cate]

nshawdvm,

It might help for you to look at the frequency of taking the drug and at what dosage vs. possible Parkinsonism. Cinnarizine is also used, in large doses, to treat Bell's Syndrome, and I know not what else.

If a person takes low dosages, ours are 15 mg. tablets, 3 times a day, perhaps for only two days. It works so well, we get out sea legs pretty fast, unless it is really bouncy.

PS. In case you wondered, I have no connection with the Belgian manufacturer.

ann

[hamburking]

The wife always sailed with me when we were younger. I couldn't imagine sailing without her. But later, she started staying home while I took the kids out on the boat, you know, for a rest. Pretty quickly, I noticed the entire season would pass by with her never stepping foot on the boat. I recently sold the boat. But the trouble is not the boat.

[witchcraft]

I have met a few cruisers to sail separately. Well , what they actually do is plan stopovers together. one spouse does not like sailing but the other loves it, so the sailor travels to a spot, the spouse flies down , they spend some time, and then the sailor continues on their way. Relieves a lot of tension between those couples.