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David_Old_Jersey · 26-07-2010, 14:05

Quote:

Originally Posted by zeehag

and i ask again...who says we HAVE to live inside a box?? or think inside one--or do anything inside of a box. and , who built the box to begin with.

There is no box. It's an illusion.

BTW personal ad acronym for "Independent Minded Free Spirited Woman" is: PITA

Whether that is considered a good thing or not is a personal choice

SaltyMonkey · 26-07-2010, 14:23

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gadagirl

You've got to give a little, take a little,
and let your poor heart break a little.
That's the story of, that's the glory of love.

[munch]

You can join in the chorus at any moment.

No Sondheim on Mondays.

(or bette)

zeehag · 26-07-2010, 14:26

LOL
good one-many make a personal choice to be , or remain, sheeple.
some choose to be individuals.
tougher path. folks laugh and have fun, but if one is unable to poke fun at self, how can one survive in the real world and enjoy life and living...?? and isnt much good humor related to being able to laugh at self ?

Gadagirl · 26-07-2010, 14:28

Who made that rule and why?

Feral Cement · 26-07-2010, 17:01

Most of us spend our lives in boxes - career boxes, marriage boxes, moral boxes, political boxes, emotional boxes, and even literal boxes called "houses". And while these boxes limit our behavior and enjoyment, they also afford protection.

When discussing the prospect of trading in "normal" middle class life for a nomadic adventure with an uncertain outcome, the need for security seems to have a distinctly feminine voice. I'm trying to figure out what aspects of the cruising lifestyle stir the greatest fear in women, and how do I address those fears? "Win the lottery" is not an acceptable answer.

John

VIslandMel · 26-07-2010, 17:19

Cheers all,
Erika, what a great idea! mm quick bio: 23, New to CF, living in the Virgin Islands with my black lab mix, Maverick. Working at a sailing school and loving life! Interests: sailing/racing, diving, music live or otherwise, beach time, traveling, and cooking for friends and family!
Happy to be a part of the CF crew - hope everyone is having an amazing summer of sailing!
Mel

captainKJ · 26-07-2010, 17:25

Quote:

Originally Posted by Feral Cement

Most of us spend our lives in boxes - career boxes, marriage boxes, moral boxes, political boxes, emotional boxes, and even literal boxes called "houses". And while these boxes limit our behavior and enjoyment, they also afford protection.

When discussing the prospect of trading in "normal" middle class life for a nomadic adventure with an uncertain outcome, the need for security seems to have a distinctly feminine voice. I'm trying to figure out what aspects of the cruising lifestyle stir the greatest fear in women, and how do I address those fears? "Win the lottery" is not an acceptable answer.

John

Living in a box, no matter what box only offers a false sense of security. Life throws many curves at a person,,, a spouse might not come home due to an accident,,, car breaks down,,, loss of a job,, loss of a home. These are daily occurrences in peoples life. How does working 40 hours for 40 years and getting cheated out of your pension sound?

If your spouse is afraid to go cruising because of the uncertainty it offers ask that spouse what guarantees life offers in general. NONE

What is the outcome of staying at work for the next 20 years and hoping that you can retire and get social security and praying that your house will go up in value and that taxes will stay low.
living in a box or living an illusion is about the same thing.
what is the outcome of cruising,,,YOU WILL see many parts of the world that people only dream about,,, you can come back home when done cruising and get another job,,that is if you do not find another place you like better to live,,,,

then again in 20 years you can always say I wish I had.... how many time have each of us said that in life so far.

Not going cruising because of the uncertainty that is offers is not a good argument,,,, nothing wrong with taking 2 or 3 years off and seeing the world,,,,

olsneezy · 26-07-2010, 18:28

TO; ZEEHAG:
Hola !!! glad to hear that you're heading down!
Maz is a pretty city, bigger than people expect, and it has a big, clean well serviced marina.
Now, I'm in Bobcaygeon, July 26/2010 but heading back home, by car, in Sept.
see Maz: Picasa Web Albums - Allen GG - Mazatlan
Note: there is a mooring spot (on the hook), next to the commercial channel, very busy after Nov.
When in Maz I will be happy to meet you and hopefully your crew, and spend some time.
And yes, I'm an old sailor, a lot of racing and cruising experience.
Talk soon, Allen

scotiasailor · 26-07-2010, 19:37

Hello folks, I have been peeking on this thread off and on for a bit now. Getting some laughs and perhaps even a few life lessons. So i thought I should join in. It's like they say, "You can't win the lottery, if you don't even buy a ticket!"

ME: A sharp 27 year old male, Getting ready to embark on another adventure in life. This ones gonna be the biggest yet. I have a lot of boat to not share with someone. I am going to be leaving Canada to head for the warmer climates this fall, and I am looking to meet some people along the way. I am not sure if my "soul mate" is going to be sitting on the other side of this screen reading this, but i know she is out there!! I just have to get of me arse, find her and chase her down!!

To others I am definetly one who live's outside "The Box". However to me... I am living life the way I want to, and that seems pretty normal to me!

Cheers, all!

osirissail · 26-07-2010, 19:41

Quote:

Originally Posted by Feral Cement

. . . When discussing the prospect of trading in "normal" middle class life for a nomadic adventure with an uncertain outcome, the need for security seems to have a distinctly feminine voice. I'm trying to figure out what aspects of the cruising lifestyle stir the greatest fear in women, and how do I address those fears? John

Assuming you want a straight realistic answer to your question and not some smart-alec remarks - There are 3 things the normal female, who is not already a die-hard sailor, wants. Again, also assuming she is coming from a life on land in one or more of those "boxes" you talked about. - - First, is no terrifying passages such as crossing the Gulf Stream in north winds. Or bashing your way east from the Turks and Caicos to Puerto Rico. You need to be patient and be able to wait for good weather windows which can take 2 days, 2 weeks or up to 2 months depending upon the season and particular passage. Give her an enjoyable "ride" and time underway where she can watch the dolphins play on your bow wave and you will convincing her slowly that this cruising thing is not all that bad. - - Second, is to have plenty of water and especially hot water. The average land person in a "box" is using about 200 gallons per day. Of course that is not possible on anything short of the Queen Mary II, but you can allow her to bathe and wash each day using the "on and off" technique instead of her only getting a bathe every week or two or month. - - Third is communications - get a good external powered WiFi antenna system and computer with an unlimited Skype account so she can talk to her friends and relatives/family each day or two when at anchor. You need to plan your anchorages to be able to get access to WiFi systems. Being cut-off from her friends and relatives/family and "trapped" on the little floating cork of a boat with only you is pretty much a death sentence to a new relationship. - - Those are the 3 most important aspects for converting a land living "box" lady into a cruising woman. It boils down to avoiding a radical, hard cut-off of her former life and comfortable collection of "boxes." A slow transition away from that life to a cruising life will occur if you don't force the transition. Take it slow and gentle. . .

Gadagirl · 26-07-2010, 19:42

@ Feral Cement
I think you might be asking the wrong group of women your question about fear. Most here have been out there or are planning to go. Clearly they've resolved most of their fears about going cruising.*

I'm sure that if you asked the general population of women, you'd get as many reasons as the number of women you ask.

When searching beyond the dock, I think your best bet would be women that enjoy adventure sports or served in a branch of the military. They naturally seem to have less fear.*

Look for the pretty girl with the broken finger nails and mused up hair. Barbie never had a sailboat. * *