A Life Worth Living

[flink]

Originally Posted by David_Old_Jersey

What binds folks together is a common danger - whether that be the elements or other people. or both.

David hit the nail on the head. Whether it's war, a dangerous ocupation, or just a lifestyle or hobby that has a somewhat dengerous element, it builds a sort of bond. Even with folks you haven't met yet.

I agree with Auzzee 100%. And I think David explained very clearly why it is what it is.

The pilot fella mentioned the same bond among pilots.

I've always had a job with a "dangerous" eliment. (i.e. military, war, contractor destroying chemical weapons, etc.) I've always felt that "bond" with others in my field, whether I liked the guy personally or not. I never felt that "bond" when I went to work in a "normal" job back in the states. So I promptly left and bought a boat and went cruising.

I feel that now with just about every sailor I meet in my travels. It's because you guys get it. We all face the same thing out there. Take a look at this forum. I don't think truck drivers, or nurses, or toll booth operators, etc. have a forum like this where everyone helps each other out the way we all do. Hell, I got help today with my autopilot from a guy in Asia.

We sailors are our own tribe. http://www.cruisersforum.com/images/...img/viking.gif

[onestepcsy37]

there truly is a bond of sorts among cruisers. when we returned from our first cruise years ago we thought that our story would be marveled at in gatherings of family and friends. but we soon discovered that it was beyond their ken to understand what we had done and where we had been. we got the usual -

''did you go through any hurricanes?"
"no"
"did you see any pirates?"
"no"
"so, what do you think of kim kardashian?"
"who?"

we quickly discovered that the only people who cared about where we had been and what we had done were other cruisers. they listened to us. and we listened to them. there were tales to be told and things to be learned. and maybe that's why we bond so well with other cruisers. things to be learned. we told them we were hit by lightning. ordinary people would have asked, "did you die?" and i might have answered "just now". but cruisers asked the questions that would enhance their understanding; "was the boat grounded?", "did any electronics survive?", and the like. so i think it's the common experiences and the lessons to be learned that keep us together.

we don't talk about our cruising to 'outsiders' anymore, unless they specifically ask, and then we try to be vague. unless they really persist, and then i think that just maybe that person is on the verge of becoming a 'convert'. we recently had a gathering of cruising friends. not one 'outsider' was invited. the party broke up really really late...

[goboatingnow]

I see no evidence that cruisers are loners , they may spend time alone, but few avoid company, in fact many , the most, are quite gregarious people.

Dave

[Seaworthy Lass]

Originally Posted by Ex-Calif

.....It seems some folks miss out on that "tribal" learning that helps one conform to the crowd. I get those that have opinions, I get those that go their own way but the inflexible PITA that can't get along in a group I will never understand how they survive in and around society.
......

They don't survive "in and around society". They go cruising LOL.

And anyway, they are not necessarily inflexible, they just don't want to flex in certain directions.

[MarkJ]

Originally Posted by goboatingnow

I see no evidence that cruisers are loners , they may spend time alone, but few avoid company, in fact many , the most, are quite gregarious people.

Dave

I agree.

The ones that really do desire, need the hermit lifestyle probably did it at home too.
Most cruisers (as HelloSailor says) come from a similar background....of fairly smart, middle class, white, time rich, ex professional or quality employments. Those sort of people are going to be interesting to talk to by anyone similar.

Like all tribes the cruisers conform in ways that sometimes irritate because of their conformity... Older men growing pony tails.... Grossss, to me. But if it makes them feel like they conform more, like a teen with a tattoo, then so be it.

One thing is that after a few years of relaxation many people who lead a highly charged earier life need more than a palm three and beach. Whether its companionship with like minds or a cerebral passtime, something must exercise the grey matter.


Mark

[boatman61]

Originally Posted by MarkJ

I agree.

The ones that really do desire, need the hermit lifestyle probably did it at home too.
Most cruisers (as HelloSailor says) come from a similar background....of fairly smart, middle class, white, time rich, ex professional or quality employments. Those sort of people are going to be interesting to talk to by anyone similar.

Bugga.... thats me OUT.....

Like all tribes the cruisers conform in ways that sometimes irritate because of their conformity... Older men growing pony tails.... Grossss, to me. But if it makes them feel like they conform more, like a teen with a tattoo, then so be it.

And I thought it was regression to 'The days of my Youth'.... ahhhhh Woodstock, the Isle of Wight... Reading and Glastonbury... Glory Days...

One thing is that after a few years of relaxation many people who lead a highly charged earier life need more than a palm three and beach. Whether its companionship with like minds or a cerebral passtime, something must exercise the grey matter.

Bugga the gray matter... rather exercise the elbow... but have been known to multi-task in a blue moon...


Mark

Nice lisp by the way... never noticed before...

[MarkJ]

An exception does NOT break a rule. Lol

[Blue Crab]

Originally Posted by Ex-Calif

@beachbum, Hellosailor & all.

I am talking about the individual vs. the tribe. Whatever size the tribe if you choose to be with the tribe there is a social expectation to attempt to conform. If one its truly a "loner" that's fine. However the folks that attempt to make the tribe conform to them, or try to take benefit from the tribe without contributing or attempting to fit into the social standards are the ones that gripe me.

I get that many sailors are loners but I find it funny when they rock up to a marina and bitch about how that "tribe" has made it too expensive and they can't get free dinghy dock, free water, free shower, free laundry and free mooring.

Oh yeah, the Wealthy Oceanview Property Owner tribe. Bugga 'em! Screw the shower and laundromat and dinghy dock and mooring. I need none of that. Just don't stop my access. The water, and sand, and wind, and sky belong to all of us. Or they should. But in our naive belief in the goodness of our fellow man (other Monkeyspheres), the bastards locked the gate behind them, paved paradise, and put up a guard shack.

I don't mind reality. But just solve the derelict problem. It doesn't have to affect everyone else. Don't want shore-employed liveaboards in the anchorage? Set time limits. I get needing a job. Rent a slip.

Just don't tell me I can't anchor the boat and row in within 10 miles of downtown Miami. Thank Gore for the internet. Now we can order almost everything rather than chase all over town without a car.


[QUOTE=hellosailor;1115201]Dan, what you call tribe I call a herd of stray cats. Mavericks, loners, not affiliated or obligated to each other at all in the way tribes are bound. The guy on the next boat may look like me, dress like me, even curse like me, but that doesn't make him my tribesman.

Let me say this about that: Meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeow.

Originally Posted by goboatingnow

I see no evidence that cruisers are loners, they may spend time alone, but few avoid company, in fact many , the most, are quite gregarious people. Dave

And the ones with wi-fi are right here on CF.

[Blue Crab]

Thought my last post would draw some fire but while I still have the floor:

Originally Posted by MarkJ

Like all tribes the cruisers conform in ways that sometimes irritate because of their conformity... Older men growing pony tails.... Grossss, to me. But if it makes them feel like they conform more, like a teen with a tattoo, then so be it. Mark

I imagine I'll step on some friendly toes here but fellas: You're not really pirates, and you're not getting younger. And Fabio, you aint. We can tell you were born a long time ago. No ****.

And don't get me started on the Harley riders!

Yep, been to Milwaukee, and Sturgis, and Daytona, and Key West, and every other zoom zooming place. It's like a one animal zoo.

Dan, there's your tribal conformity. Black.

[Seaworthy Lass]

Originally Posted by Blue Crab

.....And Fabio, you aint......

Thank goodness for that! One Fabio is one too many .

[boatman61]

Originally Posted by Blue Crab

Thought my last post would draw some fire but while I still have the floor:



I imagine I'll step on some friendly toes here but fellas: You're not really pirates, and you're not getting younger. And Fabio, you aint. We can tell you were born a long time ago. No ****.

And don't get me started on the Harley riders!

Yep, been to Milwaukee, and Sturgis, and Daytona, and Key West, and every other zoom zooming place. It's like a one animal zoo.

Dan, there's your tribal conformity. Black.

Harleys don't ZOOM.... they chugg in straight lines pretty well tho'...
WTF's Fabio...

[Seaworthy Lass]

Originally Posted by boatman61

WTF's Fabio...

Boaty, this is Fabio:

[MarkJ]

Originally Posted by Seaworthy Lass

Boaty, this is Fabio:

And girls find that sexy?

[downunder]

Originally Posted by Seaworthy Lass

Boaty, this is Fabio:

Do you keep that in your handbag?

[Seaworthy Lass]

Originally Posted by MarkJ

And girls find that sexy?

Not sure about other girls, but I certainly don't! Extreme vanity (in fact vanity of any kind) has to be one of the most offputting characteristiscs in any bloke.

Originally Posted by downunder

Do you keep that in your handbag?

Don't own a handbag LOL. Long term cruising lass here .