Dangerous skippers, and not wanting to say anything.

[four winds]

Able and Ann, Yes, that's where I am now. If he asks for help again as crew before he leaves. I will decline and tell him why.

I'll be direct but not insulting or condescending. He's not really a friend but I'm no more inclined to disrespect him any more than as any stranger on the street.

Beyond a request to crew again, I'm not sure I will make an effort to say anything.

He's probably moving on early next week.

By the way, it's only a 28 foot boat. But damn it handles like a pig.

[siamese]

I'd stay off his boat, that's for sure.

Some people don't know they don't know. As I approach a new activity, I realize I'm starting from scratch, and do my best to educate myself so I'm not a hazard to myself, others, or the equipment involved.

Others blithely venture forth with little or no forethought, and often seem impervious to experience or instruction. Different personality type, I guess. And an approach for which I have no respect.

I have no expectations with people. I'm extremely careful about giving unsolicited advice, but can sometimes encourage someone to ask for it. If you can get them to ask, great, otherwise...pfffft.

[markpierce]

One of few times I appreciate receiving assistance is when mooring fore and aft in Ayala Cove during the usual cross-current.

[poppyduc]

Seems all to true these days in Australia, as incomes have allowed people to buy larger vessels of all types, that have never had any experience on the water.
The ability to purchase a large multimillion dollar vessel does not mean you should, watching these new owners thinking they can bring these vessels into marinas etc with multiple bow thrusters etc etc, bouncing off other vessels is just plain unbelievable to see, making way up channels all over the place leaving few metre high bow waves in restricted speed zones leaving carnage in their wakes, forgetting the most basic right of way rules etc and seem to get angry when their large monetary expression does not always get them their way.
Well thats process for you.

[dgz3]

You've already arrived at the correct solution to your dilemma. And for lot's of good reasons as stated by many above. The best reason to steer clear is that it's only a matter of time before he hurts someone. Or damages his or someone else's boat or dock. And if you're aboard, goes whose fault it be?

[Aaarrgh]

Four Winds,

You would be a very welcome guest on my little tub. I sailed with a friend on his twin keel coastal cruiser on Kentucky Lake for a few years, several years ago. He taught me many basics, most of which have faded somewhat.

Also, I was invited on my son's Senior year final exam in Belmont University's "Sailing" elective class, to fill a student vacancy. Miami to Bahamas, around Abaco Islands, then return to Miami. Rotating 10 student crew, seven nights. I was hopelessly hooked, regardless of the fierce storm we endured.

Summer 2015 I found an irresistible opportunity to purchase my own little "trainer", took the entry ASA courses and certified. I then restored, updated, and slicked-up my sweet 1984 Merit 25 over the 2015-2016 winter, launched her in April, and she's in a slip at a marina near Kentucky Dam (99% sailboats). The ASA certs were required for my wife to sail with me ;-) and very necessary for my own confidence.

Merit 25 Sailboat Photo Gallery

Now, as proclaimed by an earlier contributor to this discussion, I am convinced that in order to get the best out of what will surely be the permanent replacement for my 3 motorcycles, I MUST "Get out and sail, sail, sail.", just as I had to initially get out and ride, ride, ride.

Just like I gleaned tips on how to safely maneuver motorcycles from seasoned riders, escape dangerous situations, and maintain my equipment, I must also seek out wisdom from seasoned sailors. There is a very generous attitude in this marina, and other sailors have offered so much in the way of rigging, docking, local navigating, etc.

I AM that "Newby" that yet another contributor so "colorfully" referred to, and I am grateful that my pier neighbors have not displayed that same attitude toward those of us who only wish to share the same abundant breezes that they enjoy.

Four Winds, if you ever have the chance to visit Kentucky Lake, I will GLADLY welcome you aboard "Aarrrgh!", treat you to ample refreshments, intently soak up any wisdom you will offer, and we will enjoy harnessing exciting winds in this sleek legendary racer.

Fair Winds, My Friend Aarrrgh!

[four winds]

Thanks for the invite, Arrrrgh.

Your post incites me to pass along a better story than how this thread started.

I bought my boat six years ago this month in the St. Pete area. The owner wasn't present, but across the dock from my slip was Capt. Kim. He was and is an avid day sailor and a great guy. We went out two or three times a week. On his boat, then my boat, dozens of bay sails and several offshore out and back runs. He helped me transition from my Hobie only experience to big boats. Those first few months included just as many single handed days starting the first week of ownership. Mostly because of Kim's tutoring and his assurance that "you got this".

His help in learning how to handle a boat in a marina was instrumental. That's the only time I had any anxiety. On the water was easy and I had basically memorized Chapman's.

After a few months I headed out on my first coastal wandering, back to Alabama. Those few weeks would make a good book if I was a writer. Every day a challenge and one of the best experiences of my life. Swamping the dingy, storms at anchor, wrapping the prop, water spouts, and you name it. But also sunsets, sunrises, the green flash, bio luminance, sea turtles, cannonball jellyfish thumping the hull, and dolphins coming out to me out 40 miles offshore while I was hove to at 3am changing a stern light bulb.

Spent the next year at a marina in Alabama. Day sailed two or three times a week. Often went out with another great guy, Capt. Randy. I took anybody out that wanted to go and often told them how good it was to go out with Randy because I always learned something from him each time.

One day I was out with Randy on his boat and I asked him how come he often would look for me on the dock as he prepped to go. He said that's easy, I always learn something from you.

So go sailing, and then go sailing, again and again. Go alone, with someone else, on your boat, on someone else's boat. And realize you will never learn everything about sailing.

Stay humble or the sea will take you down a notch.

[Scotty Kiwi]

Originally Posted by twig

I had another sailor criticize me on my way of raising my mast and it upset me and let my wife know he was pissing me off. 12 hours later in catholic mass the priest gave a talk on not judging people and looked square at me with his finger pointed my way and said louder "Don't judge people". I had never met this priest before. It woke me up as to how fast me make assumptions about people being idiots when we have no idea what their life is or has been like. We joke about that experience often but it left a definite impression on me.

The other sailor and the priest were the same guy, right? haha. You just didn't recognise him in his church garb, sitting way up the back?

[twig]

Very well could have been the same. That Christianity stuff is pretty sneaky sometimes.