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Lodesman · 10-03-2006, 11:03

Quote:

sluissa once whispered in the wind:

It's weird, up until the last couple of years of high school, I was doing great. Then something just felt like it snapped, and I didn't want or care or even felt able to do my best in class anymore, and I don't think I ever got over that.

Please don't take this the wrong way, but what you said made me wonder if you were more outgoing before this happened? I don't know if you had any significant life-changing event that could account for this mood change, but if there was no other reason, maybe this is a case of normal teenage hormonal changes throwing your brain chemistry out-of-whack. This isn't psychological - it's physiological and it can be fixed easily. I'm not saying you should know what you want to do with your life at 19 - heck, I'm 37 and don't know what I want to do with my life, but you should be more enthused; you sound depressed. If I'm way off base, then I apologize, but if not, then you should really consider discussing this with your doctor.
Anyway, welcome to the forum and good luck with finding a boat.

Kevin

sluissa · 10-03-2006, 12:34

I'm not sure exactly, yeah, I kinda am depressed by my current situation, but I don't think it's anything more than that really, just the situation I'm in. I havn't talked to a doctor, probably won't, don't trust them. I never have and I never will unless I have a serious injury or illness a couple of aspirin and some bedrest won't fix.

I think what made me not care anymore was I was working my butt off in school, trying to get good grades while 80% of the people around me were slacking off and doing nothing in class and still managing to at the least pass, and at the best, sometimes make better grades than I was.

And no, I've never been very outgoing, the only friends I've ever made were because I was forced to be around them, assigned seating in class, assigned group projects, things like that. Once I know people though, I'm outgoing around them and it didn't really seem like a problem till all but two of my friends ended up leaving the city after high school.

I'm looking into joining a local yacht club, I might be able to meet people that way.

To answer your post though, Yes, I am depressed, but it's because I'm pretty much being forced into a situation I don't want to be in right now which gives me little or no time to do things I'd rather be doing(such as working to save up for a boat, I HAD a nice job at a boatyard with an awesome company, very nice people, but I was forced to quit because the stress of trying to handle work and school at the same time was making me physically sick.) It might be partially hormonal, but I don't think that's the majority of it.

Thank you for your concern though, but I've thought it through and I don't really have any other viable choices at the moment I just have to deal with it and I will. I'm sorry I've used this topic to kinda whine about myself, I hate doing this because I personally don't like listening to people who do nothing but whine about themselves. An occasional whine session I can understand, and I'll even listen and feel sorry for them, I just hate it when it seems like they have a new problem every day or simply repeat the old ones. I just don't want to turn into one of those people :P

sailorgal · 14-03-2006, 08:48

Hi Sluissa
I read your post and see that you are in Pensacola. Would you by chance be attending the University of West Florida? That's where I got my biology degree. I moved there from San Francicso in 1987. Now I'm in Cincinnati, working as a research scientist at the EPA.
I just wanted to let you know that it's not unusual to not know what you want to be when you "grow up" until later in life. I didn't get my BS degree until I was in my early 30's. Right out of high school, I got a job as a secretary -- did that for 7 years while taking night classes in all sorts of things, especialy computer programming. Got a job as an entry level computer programmer and did that for 3 years. I hated it at the time (early 1980's -- still using punch cards!!!!). I hated the thought of working in the business world. I eventually moved to Pensacola (after living in Germany and San Francisco) and started at UWF. Thought I'd get a teaching degree to teach Biology, mostly because I wanted a job with summers off so I could travel. Got a part time job at the EPA in Gulf Breeze and really loved what I was doing (research on fish). I didn't get the teaching degree - just the BS in Biology, but then went to grad school in Oregon, then back to Pensacola for PhD research at the EPA. Now I'm ready to retire onto a sailboat. Not really "old enough" according to the government -- but going to do it in the next year or so anyway.

My advice, try to get that 4 year degree. Maybe think about getting a teaching degree. At least as a teacher you'll get summers off to sail!!
You mentioned you might join a yacht club. I'm sure you're familiar will the ones in the area, but I'd suggest the Pensacola Beach Yacht club. I raced on one of the boats out of that yacht club, and I know some of the boats are always looking for crew. Maybe getting out and sailing with a group once in a while will give you something to look foward to besides studying. Check out the Pensacola Beach Yacht club website. http://www.pensacolabeach-yc.org/
I know it'll be tough, but once you get that degree, you'll have a lot more options. Good luck and keep us posted.

Iris

sluissa · 14-03-2006, 22:47

Iknoebl,

Yes, I am going to UWF right now, well, sort of. I'm taking online classes currently so I'm really not going to campus, but I'm still attending that college. I was given the idea that online classes would be easier than haveing to commute to class, which from where I'm living now is generally a 45 minute drive each way. Yeah, it saves on gas, but I there is more work to be done with the classes.

Yes, I know about the Pensacola Beach Yacht Club, but again, the commute to it would be even worse than to the University. It's nearly an hour to get out there, plus the toll bridge.

I hate to keep shooting down ideas, but my mother is currently a teacher, and while I admire what she does, I don't think I could ever do it, I don't deal with kids very well.

While I still have no idea what I'm going to do in college, I'm seriously considering following CaptainK's advice and going to the diesel mechanic school after college. I might then see if I can find any more schools(welding, electrical, plumbing?) that would teach other things i'd need to know to work on boats, except possibly the fiberglassing. I did a bit of that work the short time I was working at the boatyard, and while I could handle it, it wasn't pleasant. Really gives steel hulls and ferro-cement hulls more points in my book with wood hulls a distant but definate third.

But thank you for your ideas, it's good to hear from a fellow... well... whatever they call people around here (EDIT: In pensacola I mean :P )... usually rednecks, but I don't consider myself one and you don't sound like one either since you weren't born here.