Boat partnership for major blue water sailing

[sailguy98245]

I am one of those who would love to sail around the world but have a wife who gets easily seasick and has no interest in being aboard for weeks and months at a time. However, she is very supportive of me doing long distance trips. We moved to the Pacific Northwest because of the amazing boating in protected waterways and it has worked excellently for her.

My dilemma is that I can't justify spending the money on a serious blue water cruiser when I can only use it a few months at a time. So, I would like a partner. But most partnership arrangements are for boating locally.

Does anyone have any idea how I would go about finding this kind of arrangement? I would consider doing the World ARC as I was aboard a sailboat for three months that was on the same route from the Caribbean to Tahiti and liked how that rally worked. I'm an experienced blue water sailor with over 35,000 sea miles and experienced in all aspects of trip planning, preparation and execution of long distance crossings.

While it's not necessary for me to circumnavigate, I would love to get back to the S. Pacific and do the milk run. I'm 60, physically fit, but feel the clock ticking for this type of adventure.

Serious responses very much appreciated!

[rickpalm]

Sailguy98245,
I think you could find all the long distance sailing you want without the partnership issues. We did Jimmy Cornell's Europa 92 and had been active with 1500 for many years and with WCC for a couple of yeas. On the World ACR Crew come and go or stay for the entire trip. If you really want to be a partner I'm confident you can find a boat that will work out an agreement with you for the trip. I know it has been done. I'd register on the crew list at WCC outlining your desires and qualifications. My guess is that you will get serious responses from boats planning to do the next World ARC.

[tuffr2]

I take it you are retired. I would think being away from the wife for a long period of time could cause an issue. Especially if you really like the adventure and want to continue long trips.

Man, what an adventure a circumnavigation would be.

Good luck

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[JPA Cate]

I don't know you or your good lady, but man, I have been getting motion sickness that I can remember since I was 4. As I have over 100,00 cruising miles, you can guess that I trialled a lot of stuff before I found what works for me-- stugeron. Available from internet pharmacies.

Your good lady may not want to accompany you if she thinks she will be seasick and cold and miserable, but there is a chance she might be onboard with your plans if you guys could factor out the seasickness.

There are also some over the counter things that work for some people, but I really would want to know how your good lady feels, and of course, yourself, before going on with this.

Ann

[Dr. Sea]

RickPalm is right--there are lots of opportunities for blue water cruising as volunteer crew. Offshore Passage Opportunities and OceanCrewLink.com both list a wide variety of boats looking for crew. They both have small membership fees but they are definitely worth looking into.

[Dr. Sea]

SailGuy, don't let your wife give up on water sailing">blue water sailing, unless she just really doesn't want to do it. Ann and lots of other people have reported that stugeron works very well. Also there is a new nausea fixer call ReliefBand that was developed for nausea related to pregnancy or chemo treatment. It looks similar to a watch except that you wear it under your wrist. It's not a passive Sea Band, but it emits a small pulse that stimulates the median nerve. It claims to work in 10 minutes. I haven't tried it, but I'm getting one for my wife.

[Kenomac]

Check into fractional ownership for a yacht which continuously sails around the world. We ran into a couple of boats in the Med doing this. There were eight fractional owners who each choose two weeks onboard with their crew. That particular French/Finnish boat had already circumnavigated three times over an eight year period, with fractional owners coming and going.

Another scheme is to single hand or take on crew to do the longer passages, then have your wife join you. We sometimes do this, and I know of several other solo sailors doing the same. It's a great compromise. In our case I'm on the boat for 5-6 months continuous and my wife joins me for four three week stretches.

Another good option, is to sign up and be crew for a delivery company. PYD is the company we used out of the U.K., nearly all of their crew are doing this. 60-70 year olds looking for adventure.

[akprb]

We did this for years with a partner. I wrote a bit about it here:

Back Story | sailingohana

Worked out fantastic for everyone with some basic ground rules and a good relationship. In particular the boat was generally moving and maintained, in addition it would end up in different places which made in exciting for flying in blind to take off for a few months.

Have a ball!

[seasick]

My wife and I have sailed long-distance together for three decades. A metastatic cancer diagnosis and grandkids have reshuffled her priorities and threw my vito option clean out the port hole. Now I solo the boat to beautiful destinations and she flies in for the turquoise lagoons.

As a commercial vessel's broker of a decade, I helped facilitate a great many partnership agreements mainly in fishing vessel operations. I recommend against this option. Partners are often the best of friends going in and the opposite coming out of these agreements.

There are better alternatives. Crew for other cruisers, become a delivery captain or crew. Bareboat charter, look for a new wife. Just kidding on the last option.

Whenever my wife appears to be "very supportive of my doing long distance trips" I have to wonder if I've been snoring or leaving the toilet seat up too often.

Perhaps go for a more modest boat and use the dollars you save to fly her in and out of your destinations.

My brothers and sister and I are all long distance sailors and circumnavigators. We are all extremely close and have similar aspirations in continuing sailing but even as close as we are, we would never consider partnering in a vessel.

[tuffr2]

I have one friend that I grew up with. We are very like minded. He is about the only person I would partner with.

If you have any like minded life long friends maybe they are in a stage of their life they would go with you.

I would be a little queasy picking someone I did not know.

Now on the other hand you have sailing that might be a bonding agent. Like me saying... he has a boat so I basically like him.



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[sailguy98245]

Originally Posted by rickpalm

Sailguy98245,
I think you could find all the long distance sailing you want without the partnership issues. We did Jimmy Cornell's Europa 92 and had been active with 1500 for many years and with WCC for a couple of yeas. On the World ACR Crew come and go or stay for the entire trip. If you really want to be a partner I'm confident you can find a boat that will work out an agreement with you for the trip. I know it has been done. I'd register on the crew list at WCC outlining your desires and qualifications. My guess is that you will get serious responses from boats planning to do the next World ARC.

Thank you, this is an excellent idea.

[hellosailor]

Dr. Sea-
I've used the electric ReliefBand, and for me it totally beats everything on the market except Scop. There are two models, one with replaceable batteries, not a great waterproof seal on that lid so I seal over it, and a "disposable" model. About $75 bottom price either way.
I usually set it midway at "3" on the 1-5 range. And the key is to position it, with the conductive gel, in precisely the right point over the tendons/nerves. You can feel them get zapped all the way up to your fingertips, and the band itself feels a bit like a rat chewing at your wrist if you set it up on high. But hey, a rat chewing on your wrist damn well pushes all thoughts of seasickness out of your mind.(G)
The replacement batteries are 2025, a little slimmer than the usual 2032, but if you throw away the battery "sled" the 2032's fit in perfectly. Same price, longer life.
And if you don't feel the tingle, it probably has slipped out of position and needs to be slipped back in place. The gel is also standard "EKG" type contact jelly.


Back to the OP and his partner question...another possibly way more complex but satisfactory solution, might be to buy the boat, put it into a charter company (private or someone else's) on a moving schedule, and book "owner's time" on the legs that he wants to sail on. Yes, that can bring complications, but it also eliminates the many complications that a 'second wife' of a partner will bring.

[sailguy98245]

Originally Posted by Ann T. Cate

I don't know you or your good lady, but man, I have been getting motion sickness that I can remember since I was 4. As I have over 100,00 cruising miles, you can guess that I trialled a lot of stuff before I found what works for me-- stugeron. Available from internet pharmacies.

Your good lady may not want to accompany you if she thinks she will be seasick and cold and miserable, but there is a chance she might be onboard with your plans if you guys could factor out the seasickness.

There are also some over the counter things that work for some people, but I really would want to know how your good lady feels, and of course, yourself, before going on with this.

Ann

We have used Stugeron for many years. It is less effective for her now than it used to be. Also, part of the problem is that she is just uncomfortable being offshore.

[sailguy98245]

Yes, the Reliefband does also work. I have one and can say their best quality is that they work even after getting seasick.

The reality is that my wife's sea sickness is only part of the problem. She is pretty much terrified of the idea of being offshore.

[sailguy98245]

I have many friends who would love to do this, mostly younger, but just are not at the same stage in life as me.