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Old 28-06-2017, 06:32   #31
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Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Pangaea
Posts: 10,856
Re: After a year of yard work, wife wants to go to an office.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Sandero View Post
wrong... merely living on a boat minimizes one's footprint.... no it doesn;t mean no Jacuzzi's and generators... what an ignorant remark.

+++++

Don't ask for or take relationship advice from strangers on the sailing forum or on a web site for that matter.

Marriage is a journey to be SHARED and so that's what you aim for... You knew that... so did she... work it out.

I met a Norwegian family in Antigua who raised 2 little kids on a boat... one was born while cruising. Fabulous kids. It's doable. Where there is a will there will be a way.
I'm simply stating the obvious, and not the one who's trying to figure out why his plans have turned to baby poop.
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Old 28-06-2017, 12:45   #32
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Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: Paradise
Boat: Various
Posts: 2,427
Re: After a year of yard work, wife wants to go to an office.

Wifey B: The answer is simple. COMMUNICATE with each other. Notice I didn't say "Talk" because there's a huge difference. Listen, try to understand, empathize with each other and if you can't get it all out and discuss it all, then get a counselor to assist in the communication. This is a critical and very important time of your life. A crossroad and many roads, one to be taken now and maybe others later. It doesn't matter a flippin' bit what anyone here thinks. Only what you and she are thinking.

Right now it's a situation where one of you is going to be unhappy because you haven't worked on figuring it out together and really communicating. You need to find a way to make it where both of you are happy and accept that any sacrifice is more than offset by what is gained.

Sometimes we regret dreams not pursued, but if out attitude toward life is positive, we might just find the dream we get to live is far better than the fantasy we once had. My life hasn't gone at all like planned or like I dreamed. Much better. When I was 18 I couldn't even imagine being here where I am at 38 (omg I hate typing such a big number for my age..in my mind I'm still 21). The point is none of us have any idea of 20 years from now. We just can make today the best possible and keep those dreams but let them change regularly along the way.

On October 13, 2000, the only dream I could ever really want came true. It's all been perfect since. I hope the dreams come true for you is when you found each other and then the birth of a child and maybe it will include the birth of a second child. If you value those dreams come true and realize how lucky you are, then making other dreams come true along the way will be easy.

This sounds insanc, but our first night together, the night we met, my hubby and I shared our life stories, spilled our guts, shared things that we'd never told anyone else, shared our hopes and dreams. I cried for the first time in my life. I grew up thinking I was too tough to cry. But with him, I did. We communicated that night and have never stopped. Maybe there will be some laughter and some tears mixed in when the two of you sit down and open up to each other.

Good luck to you both.
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