starting new

[chriskilmer]

just saying hi. im budvar on this site but unable to log on.

major family changes. getting close to 60. its now or never. called an estate auction business. at this rate of donating/giving away/selling, it could take years. the goal? head to the opposite part of the country (east coast) find a boat to make my home. then head south until the butter melts. to be continued.

[LittleWing77]

"Head South until the butter melts." Great image!

Good luck,
LittleWing77

[tkeithlu]

Welcome to the forum, Chris.

[LauraleeG]

Whats your motivation?

[chriskilmer]

wife and i planned on moving to clearwater/st petersburg. then lung cancer hit. she died last month after a four year battle of surgery, chemo, immunotherapy, and drug trial.

in 20 years will turn 80. thats my motivation. think i’ve reached that go little, go now point. i have no family in my immediate vicinity. however, do have family and friends near annapolis and also florida.

RN with a back that keeps telling me to retire early.

promise to fix the spell/cap checker...using my wife’s tablet...learning curve.

[barnakiel]

Loose yourself in the call. Doing something new, intensely, helps to patch up and use whatever is left over.


Been there, tried that. Worked.


Good luck, report on progress,
b.

[Tayana42]

Hi Chris. I am very sorry for your loss. I am so fortunate to have my wife to share the adventure with. But I think you will enjoy moving ahead with your sailing plan. Certainly it will be a way to get yourself moving again toward a new destination and a new way of living. And remember the Isak Dinesen quote,
“The cure for anything is salt water: sweat, tears or the sea.”

[JPA Cate]

Hi, Chris,

Sorry for your loss. You've got a good compass right there if you know so soon what you want to do. The PNW has great cruising grounds, so move near the water when you can, and start sailing on other people's boats. All you need is a tiny studio apartment. Visit sailing clubs. Be volunteer crew for haul outs and races. You will learn a great deal, and refine your ideas of what type of boat to buy for the trips you want to make.

Ann

[chriskilmer]

thank you all for the nice feedback. its very welcome. just sold my US Yacht 25 (sloop, fin keel) after 7 yrs of heavy use. i am ready for a new challenge.

lots of sailing, but on a river (Columbia; train and other bridges, current). never ocean sailed. im very attracted to the thought of minimalism, and boat living.
a bit nervous about the ocean. think with my background can work into it ok, with time.

i do this with regret. leaving behind many cherished items which i can no longer keep. family has greatfully accepted many things of karin’s which are of interest to them. still there is much left.

moderators, if i updated this thread occasionally, would it be appropriate here or best in another forum, thank you.

[Captn_Black]

Originally Posted by chriskilmer

head south until the butter melts. to be continued.

If you're wearing socks, you're too far north

[LittleWing77]

Originally Posted by chriskilmer

a bit nervous about the ocean. think with my background can work into it ok, with time.

Chris,

That's absolutlely the right attitude. Not to let it overwhelm you, of course (!) but to always approach the ocean with preparation, caution and respect.

You'll be fine.

I like the Isak Dinesen someone quoted above: “The cure for anything is salt water: sweat, tears or the sea."

I've always gone to sea for healing, myself.

Originally Posted by chriskilmer

i do this with regret. leaving behind many cherished items which i can no longer keep. family has greatfully accepted many things of karin’s which are of interest to them. still there is much left.

It's all just STUFF, Chris. Remember what George Carlin had to say about it?

https://youtu.be/sctC_cuP-Hc

You did right. Pass what you can on to your family and then thank all those cherished items for the delight and comfort they have provided you and Karin over the years and then... release them. Give them to Goodwill with the hope that they will find their way to someone who will cherish them, too.

Here's a very old Rumi poem that may provide guidance:

The Guest House
This being human is a guest house.
Every morning a new arrival.
A joy, a depression, a meanness,
some momentary awareness comes
as an unexpected visitor.
Welcome and entertain them all!
Even if they are a crowd of sorrows,
who violently sweep your house
empty of its furniture,
still, treat each guest honorably.
He may be clearing you out
for some new delight.
The dark thought, the shame, the malice.
meet them at the door laughing and invite them in.
Be grateful for whatever comes.
Each has been sent
as a guide from beyond.
— Jellaludin Rumi

Good luck on your new journey!
LittleWing77

[chriskilmer]

Littlewing77, Thank You so much. esp. enjoyed The GuestHouse.

Estate sale next month. then hopefully sell the house. take the cat and jetta tdi (210k miles, 54 mpg) across the country to stepdaughter in fort lee, va (near Annapolis). I have her blessing! Also have two friends in Florida. looking to find a good live aboard cutter wiith a pedigree.

ICU RN with 26 yrs experience. However, my passion has changed. get a good boat. live on her, learn new skills, another language. make new friends.

i hope to be heading east by august.

thanks.
chris

[LittleWing77]

There are a couple of fantastic guys on this Forum you may want to reach out to and say hello: Thomm225 and Auspicious.

Tom has a lovely little Bristol 27 that he avidly single-hands out of Annapolis - while keeping a weather-eye out for local boats for sale... he might be a good resource for finding your next boat. And Auspicious (Dave) is an amazing Delivery Skipper and Boat Manager who also may be able to help you get a line on a boat, firstoff, but secondly, if you were contemplating just getting some sailing in, you might put in a volunteer crew application with him and act as delivery crew.

The possibilities are endless!

Good luck with the estate sale. It will be painful, but I can tell you - you will feel surprisingly light (as in unburdened) and free afterwards. <Breathe>
LittleWing77

[Auspicious]

Originally Posted by LittleWing77

"Head South until the butter melts." Great image!

Hmm. Image of LittleWing77 putting butter into the fridge to make it softer. *grin*

Originally Posted by chriskilmer

Estate sale next month. then hopefully sell the house. take the cat and jetta tdi (210k miles, 54 mpg) across the country to stepdaughter in fort lee, va (near Annapolis). I have her blessing! Also have two friends in Florida. looking to find a good live aboard cutter wiith a pedigree.

Chris, I'm sorry for your loss and especially for the pain of your bride's illness and decline.

Ft Lee VA is about a 2-1/2 hour drive from Annapolis.

I'm a big fan of estuaries: Chesapeake Bay, Long Island Sound, Puget Sound, San Fransisco Bay, maybe Tampa Bay. Lots elsewhere in the world of course. Chesapeake Bay may well be the best of the bunch, in the United States at least. Lots of people in Richmond (Ft Lee is a suburb) sail out of Deltaville or Hampton. Those aren't exactly short drives either. You'll find more boats to look at in Annapolis.

Don't give up any of your certs. Lots of good hospitals around the Chesapeake and opportunities to work part time. Keep options open.

It sounds like you have a reasonable plan, or at least a plan for a plan.

I'm more than happy to be "your guy in Annapolis." I can certainly introduce you to people who can help with your boat search. I'm not shy about sharing my opinions either. *grin* Write me any time. dave@auspiciousworks.com Just remind me of the context. We have a cat and a VW so we can even help with vet and mechanic recommendations. *grin* I truly hope your cat is a better car passenger than ours.

[djousset]

Welcome Chris, and so sorry for your loss. I bought my first boat at 57+ after experiencing a different kind of loss, I just turned 60 and am having a ball learning. It's a lot of work but the joy is immeasurable. And don't be afraid of the ocean, bring along a good plan, a heavy dose of respect for it and trust in your vessel. I am excited for you, best of luck!