The New Joke Thread

[svmariane]

Originally Posted by smbdyiam2

Lets just store it!!!!! That's the GREAT PLAN !!!

Well, from what I recall (and not being a geology major I could be wrong) but methinks mother nature created some rather large storage areas.

Stop pumping and leave it in the ground? And any ANY oil already pumped by definition already has a storage space, be that onshore tanks, floating tankers, or pipelines. Some people/companies will eat the cost, sure. Then again, some people ate the cost when the Tulip Bubble crashed. Me, I don't own oil company stocks. Invested mostly in grocery stores because no matter what else, people are always going to want food. And beer mfrs. Man's gotta have his pint of beer.



#Meanwhile in cyberspace...

Feeling guilty about your children watching too much TV? Just mute it and put the subtitles on. Boom! Now their reading!

From an unconfirmed report: It turns out, the coronavirus crisis may have also changed the way we perceive jokes. One professor at the University of California, Coye Cheshire told CNET: “Right now it might be hard for companies and individuals to read the room virtually.” The potential to misread any joke is high as ever, and any potential prank may become a subject of severe criticism. Kathleen Hall Jamieson, a communications professor at the University of Pennsylvania, warns that coronavirus jokes could be viewed as the truth. The critics of corona jokes say that even if toilet paper pranks are hilarious, they might set off panic buyers.

Not saying nothin, but was thinking about political-leaning jokes.

Week three of isolation and it's like Las Vegas in our house. We're losing money by the minute, cocktails are acceptable at any hour, and nobody knows what time it is.

In case you've lost track of the date, today is March 87th.
.

[Montanan]

Oil / Gasoline: I am presently getting 3+ weeks per gallon.

[smbdyiam2]

Originally Posted by svmariane

Well, from what I recall (and not being a geology major I could be wrong) but methinks mother nature created some rather large storage areas.

Stop pumping and leave it in the ground? And any ANY oil already pumped by definition already has a storage space, be that onshore tanks, floating tankers, or pipelines. Some people/companies will eat the cost, sure. Then again, some people ate the cost when the Tulip Bubble crashed. Me, I don't own oil company stocks. Invested mostly in grocery stores because no matter what else, people are always going to want food. And beer mfrs. Man's gotta have his pint of beer.



#Meanwhile in cyberspace...

Feeling guilty about your children watching too much TV? Just mute it and put the subtitles on. Boom! Now their reading!

From an unconfirmed report: It turns out, the coronavirus crisis may have also changed the way we perceive jokes. One professor at the University of California, Coye Cheshire told CNET: “Right now it might be hard for companies and individuals to read the room virtually.” The potential to misread any joke is high as ever, and any potential prank may become a subject of severe criticism. Kathleen Hall Jamieson, a communications professor at the University of Pennsylvania, warns that coronavirus jokes could be viewed as the truth. The critics of corona jokes say that even if toilet paper pranks are hilarious, they might set off panic buyers.

Not saying nothin, but was thinking about political-leaning jokes.

Week three of isolation and it's like Las Vegas in our house. We're losing money by the minute, cocktails are acceptable at any hour, and nobody knows what time it is.

In case you've lost track of the date, today is March 87th.
.

STOP PUMPING? I think they would have to put on at least 10 more engineers to do that . They are not prepared for something like that. How would they ever get restarted?

[JPA Cate]

Interesting point, smbdyiam, that a lot of head to lose.

[svmariane]

Originally Posted by smbdyiam2

STOP PUMPING? I think they would have to put on at least 10 more engineers to do that . They are not prepared for something like that. How would they ever get restarted?

Lots of engineers out there. Many would jump at the chance to do something new/different/interesting/complex. Real emergencies are when we're not prepared to do "something like that" but we jump in and do it anyway.

The demand for oil tanked. The world is awash in already pumped oil. While things return to normality (or some level of such) the already pumped oil can be channeled through normal processes and there would be time for the engineers to figure out how to get restarted. Maybe this is naive, but it seems to me that an opened bottle of champagne that's recapped doesn't lose all of its fizz. Well-head pressure could be capped.

But this is an internet forum and what the hell do I know.

[ArmyDaveNY]

Originally Posted by svmariane

The demand for oil tanked. The world is awash in already pumped oil.

Just remember; Oil's well that ends well.

[a64pilot]

Originally Posted by carstenb

A Texan and a West Virginian were sitting at the bar drinking. A Texan always wants to impress with how everything is bigger in the Lone star state, so he leans over and says:

"At home, I can get in my truck and drive all day without leaving my property"

The West Virginian takes a sip of his beer and replies:

"Yeah, I got me a truck like that too"

There is a lot of truth to that, As a unit 3/6 Cav would deploy to the Big Bend area of Tx and get permission to operate on one or two different ranches, they were so big that we could fly a Battle Drill and fly for 100 NM miles or so and still be on the same ranch

Here is one for sale

https://www.click2houston.com/news/t...national-park/

[StuM]

Originally Posted by Eigenvector

240 or 241, Whatever it takes.

Don't feel bad, a lot of people get that quote wrong:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c6si8Xp8P-M

[ArmyDaveNY]

Originally Posted by StuM

Don't feel bad, a lot of people get that quote wrong:

I find that shocking! Don"t worry, I won't let it phase me.

[StuM]

Originally Posted by Eigenvector

7 and 1 = 8

7 AND 1 = 1
.
.
.
.
.
.


(and 7 XOR 1 = 6)

[smbdyiam2]

Originally Posted by ArmyDaveNY

Just remember; Oil's well that ends well.

and remember to keep things well oiled.

[dfelsent]

7 OR 1 = 7

(7 == 1) = false

And so on. [emoji1]

[Trevor Doble]

Originally Posted by a64pilot

There is a lot of truth to that, As a unit 3/6 Cav would deploy to the Big Bend area of Tx and get permission to operate on one or two different ranches, they were so big that we could fly a Battle Drill and fly for 100 NM miles or so and still be on the same ranch

Here is one for sale

https://www.click2houston.com/news/t...national-park/

Not wanting to be THAT person, but the largest ranch in Texas is King Ranch at 1,289 square miles.

Australia's largest, Anna Creek, is 9,140 square miles and the top 73 are all more than 1,540 square miles.

See, it's not only Texans who brag!

[StuM]

Originally Posted by a64pilot

There is a lot of truth to that, As a unit 3/6 Cav would deploy to the Big Bend area of Tx and get permission to operate on one or two different ranches, they were so big that we could fly a Battle Drill and fly for 100 NM miles or so and still be on the same ranch

Here is one for sale

https://www.click2houston.com/news/t...national-park/

100 miles? Pah!


https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anna_Creek_Station

[smbdyiam2]

isn't it fun to joke about oil rather than corona virus. I really believe I can live with or with out oil. I cannot say the same about the coronavirus. So more jokes on oil -----Please