The New Joke Thread

[Montanan]

Originally Posted by Glenn C

Well I could be wrong, but I think the humour is in she was implying what was the WHO doing while Covid 1 to 18 were out and about, where as the the 19 designation comes from the year, that is 2019 that the virus was first detected.....I guess you had to be there.....

Yep, like the perhaps 2000 other Space Odysseys, and of course this not being her first rodeo what with her infamous Bowling Green comment.

[socaldmax]

This reminds me of when Howard Stern first hit the airwaves, people either loved him or hated him.

Those who loved him listened to him on average of 3 hrs per day, just to see what kind of wild crap he would say.

Those who hated him listened to him on average of 4 hrs per day, just to see what kind of wild crap he would say.

[SteveG58]

[Adelie]

Originally Posted by SteveG58

Attachment 213030

They’re too close, they are not following social distancing requirements.

[carstenb]

Originally Posted by ArmyDaveNY

In the spirit of brothers in arms, what is the difference between the Army and the Boy Scouts?

The Boy Scouts have adult supervision!

Yeah -

What does Army stand for?


Ain't Ready to be a Marine Yet


Note I'm not making fun of the navy - they might send a sub to torpedo us.

[svmariane]

Originally Posted by Adelie

They’re too close, they are not following social distancing requirements.

Yeah, maybe. But they all have a self-contained breathing apparatus so cannot cough or sneeze or even breath on each other. Plus, they're staying out of arms reach so cannot shake hands or hug each other. Give ém a bit of credit, okay?



Edit: Instead of saying give them credit, should have said something about "you can see that's an obvious positive they're showing". My brain isn't functioning well today.

[crooks]

My closing statement:

My client was not in town the day of the murder.

If you find that he was in town, you know he was not at the scene.

The victim was shot, but this good man was not the shooter.

The murder weapon was in his hand, but he had no criminal intent when it went off.

This is a clear case of self-defense.

Let's cut to the truth, the SOB needed killing.

[ArmyDaveNY]

Originally Posted by SteveG58

Attachment 213030

I wonder if they feel drained after their meeting?

[chrisr]

Originally Posted by crooks

My closing statement:

My client was not in town the day of the murder.

If you find that he was in town, you know he was not at the scene.

The victim was shot, but this good man was not the shooter.

The murder weapon was in his hand, but he had no criminal intent when it went off.

This is a clear case of self-defense.

Let's cut to the truth, the SOB needed killing.

that's a bit like my favourite all -purpose excuse

"I don't know...I didn't do it...I won't do it again"

cheers,

[smbdyiam2]

I met an old friend I had not seen in many years. As I got closer I saw the woman he was with was pregnant. I said looks like wife is expecting? He said she is a little bit. But it is not mine. Carl did it the most.

[Wotname]

Originally Posted by ArmyDaveNY

I wonder if they feel drained after their meeting?

Nah, charged, I'm positive about it.

[ArmyDaveNY]

Originally Posted by Wotname

Nah, charged, I'm positive about it.

Your comment gave me a bit of a jolt, but it was well done! Watts next?

[Pelagic]

Originally Posted by ArmyDaveNY

Your comment gave me a bit of a jolt, but it was well done! Watts next?

The whole group is charged with battery! And gets Pun.... Ished!

Blame it on the lockdown

[ArmyDaveNY]

Originally Posted by Pelagic

The whole group is charged with battery! And gets Pun.... Ished!

Blame it on the lockdown

The speed with which these puns are coming is amazing, but can we D cell erate the momentum a bit?

[skipperpete]

Originally Posted by LakeSuperior

It has been a year since Notre Dame burned down and they still do not know how it started,



but Quasimodo has a hunch...

There’s a name that rings a bell.