Cruisers Forum
 


Closed Thread
  This discussion is proudly sponsored by:
Please support our sponsors and let them know you heard about their products on Cruisers Forums. Advertise Here
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread Rating: Thread Rating: 8 votes, 4.38 average. Display Modes
Old 03-11-2018, 21:22   #3661
Registered User

Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: San Diego, CA
Posts: 6,619
Re: The New Joke Thread

socaldmax is offline  
Old 04-11-2018, 09:27   #3662
cruiser

Join Date: Jan 2017
Boat: Retired from CF
Posts: 13,317
Re: The New Joke Thread

A woman takes a lover during the day, while her husband is at work.

One day, her 9-year-old son hides in the closet during one of her romps. Her husband comes home unexpectedly, so she hides the lover in the closet.

The little boy says, "It's dark in here."
The man whispers, "Yes, it is."
Boy - "I have a baseball."
Man - "That's nice."
Boy - "Want to buy it?"
Man - "No, thanks."
Boy - "My dad's outside."
Man - "OK, how much?"
Boy - "$250."

In the next few weeks, it happens again that the boy and the mom's lover end up in the closet together.

Boy - "It's dark in here."
Man - "Yes, it is."
Boy - "I have a baseball glove."
Man - Remembering last time, asks, "How much?"
Boy - "$750."
Man - "Fine."

A few days later, the father says to the boy, "Grab your ball and glove. Let's go outside and toss the baseball."

The boy says, "I can't. I sold them."

The father asks, "How much did you sell them for?"

The son says "$1,000."

The father says, "It's terrible to overcharge your friends like that. That's way more than those two things cost. I'm going to take you to church and make you confess."

They go to the church and the father makes the little boy sit in the confession booth and he closes the door.

The boy says, "It's dark in here."
The priest says, "Don't start that crap again!"
john61ct is offline  
Old 04-11-2018, 11:32   #3663
Registered User
 
ontherocks83's Avatar

Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Warwick RI
Boat: Catalina 30
Posts: 1,873
Re: The New Joke Thread

Quote:
Originally Posted by john61ct View Post
________
Woman delivers a baby. Doctor takes the baby, and throws it, smashing around the hospital room, drop-kicking it, etc. Mother starts freaking out, being held back by nurses, begging “WHYYYY!!??”.

Doctor holds the baby upside down by the ankle and says “I’m just messing with you, it was born dead”.

________
Attachment 180116
This one goes too far. Not even close to funny.
__________________
-Si Vis Pacem Parabellum
-Molon Labe
ontherocks83 is offline  
Old 04-11-2018, 12:58   #3664
Registered User
 
svmariane's Avatar

Join Date: May 2007
Location: On the hard due to wife's medical condition.
Boat: Sold, alas, because life happens.
Posts: 1,829
Re: The New Joke Thread

Quote:
Originally Posted by socaldmax View Post
New Amazon Echo Silver, for all you old folks...
Now THAT made the morning all the sweeter!
Love a good laugh over coffee. Thanks!
__________________
"Being offended is not the same thing as being right." Dave Barry.
Laughter is the salve that keeps reality from scaring.
¯\_(ツ)_/¯
svmariane is offline  
Old 04-11-2018, 14:17   #3665
Registered User
 
Therapy's Avatar

Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: W Florida
Boat: Still have the 33yo Jon boat. But now a CATAMARAN. Nice little 18' Bay Cat.
Posts: 7,086
Images: 4
Re: The New Joke Thread

Quote:
Originally Posted by D&D View Post
Senior chuckles...?



An elderly couple had dinner at another couple's house, and after eating, the wives left the table and went into the kitchen.
The two gentlemen were talking, and one said, 'Last night we went out to a new restaurant and it was really great.. I would recommend it very highly.'
The other man said, 'What is the name of the restaurant?'
The first man thought and thought and finally said, 'What is the name of that flower you give to someone you love?
You know.... The one that's red and has thorns.'
'Do you mean a rose?'
'Yes, that's the one,' replied the man. He then turned towards the kitchen and yelled, 'Rose, what's the name of that restaurant we went to last night?'
B.I.C.U. (Before Intensive Care Unit)..........

I thought that was funny.
__________________
Who knows what is next.
Therapy is offline  
Old 04-11-2018, 14:23   #3666
cruiser

Join Date: Jan 2017
Boat: Retired from CF
Posts: 13,317
Re: The New Joke Thread

Quote:
Originally Posted by ontherocks83 View Post
This one goes too far. Not even close to funny.
Ya, that was my point.

Getting a bit too dark in here
john61ct is offline  
Old 04-11-2018, 14:27   #3667
CF Adviser
 
Pelagic's Avatar

Join Date: Oct 2007
Boat: Van Helleman Schooner 65ft StarGazer
Posts: 10,280
Re: The New Joke Thread

Quote:
Originally Posted by ontherocks83 View Post
This one goes too far. Not even close to funny.
The cartoon one is no worse than some Animé, but definitely insensitive to suicide issues.

However, I agee......that drop kick dead baby type of dark humor is best left within the genocidal tendencies of a sick comedian. [emoji20]
.....I can only imagine what someone who's baby died at birth would feel reading that ....Sick!
Pelagic is offline  
Old 04-11-2018, 14:31   #3668
CF Adviser
 
Pelagic's Avatar

Join Date: Oct 2007
Boat: Van Helleman Schooner 65ft StarGazer
Posts: 10,280
Re: The New Joke Thread

Quote:
Originally Posted by john61ct View Post
Ya, that was my point.

Getting a bit too dark in here
So your solution is to turn off the last light?... Jeez!
Pelagic is offline  
Old 04-11-2018, 15:05   #3669
cruiser

Join Date: Jan 2017
Boat: Retired from CF
Posts: 13,317
Re: The New Joke Thread

The whippings will stop when morale improves
john61ct is offline  
Old 04-11-2018, 15:06   #3670
Registered User
 
ontherocks83's Avatar

Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Warwick RI
Boat: Catalina 30
Posts: 1,873
Re: The New Joke Thread

Quote:
Originally Posted by john61ct View Post
Ya, that was my point.

Getting a bit too dark in here
Again, another one of your posts that makes absolutely no sense. I call BS on your reasoning/ excuse and your line of sick humor should be banned.
__________________
-Si Vis Pacem Parabellum
-Molon Labe
ontherocks83 is offline  
Old 04-11-2018, 15:28   #3671
Moderator Emeritus
 
a64pilot's Avatar

Cruisers Forum Supporter

Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: Jacksonville/ out cruising
Boat: Island Packet 38
Posts: 31,351
Re: The New Joke Thread

It would be best if we refrained from the darker side if you will.
Lighthearted and funny, that’s what the thread is supposed to be.
a64pilot is offline  
Old 04-11-2018, 16:11   #3672
Registered User
 
Therapy's Avatar

Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: W Florida
Boat: Still have the 33yo Jon boat. But now a CATAMARAN. Nice little 18' Bay Cat.
Posts: 7,086
Images: 4
Re: The New Joke Thread

There is relief in the "Ignore" selection.
__________________
Who knows what is next.
Therapy is offline  
Old 04-11-2018, 17:10   #3673
cruiser

Join Date: Jan 2017
Boat: Retired from CF
Posts: 13,317
Re: The New Joke Thread

Quote:
Originally Posted by a64pilot View Post
Lighthearted and funny, that’s what the thread is supposed to be.
Completely agree, thanks
john61ct is offline  
Old 04-11-2018, 17:21   #3674
Registered User
 
ontherocks83's Avatar

Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Warwick RI
Boat: Catalina 30
Posts: 1,873
Re: The New Joke Thread

Quote:
Originally Posted by john61ct View Post
Completely agree, thanks
If that were true you wouldn't have posted such a disgusting "joke." I have lots more to say to you about it but as I'm sure the mods would frown upon my language, let's just say by the amount of pm's i've gotten from others your "opinions" are not appreciated by a lot of us.
__________________
-Si Vis Pacem Parabellum
-Molon Labe
ontherocks83 is offline  
Old 04-11-2018, 17:45   #3675
Registered User

Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Full time cruisers
Boat: Krogen 42
Posts: 403
Re: The New Joke Thread

Then don’t read them!
__________________
----------------------------------
Terry
meridian28 is offline  
Closed Thread

Tags
boat

Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search
Display Modes Rate This Thread
Rate This Thread:

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off


Advertise Here


All times are GMT -7. The time now is 04:30.


Google+
Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.8 Beta 1
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Social Knowledge Networks
Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.8 Beta 1
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.

ShowCase vBulletin Plugins by Drive Thru Online, Inc.