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Old 22-10-2020, 14:38   #13351
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Re: The New Joke Thread

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Originally Posted by MicHughV View Post
the benefits of old age
...
I didn't make it to the gym today.....that makes it five years in a row....

That's why I started calling the toilet "the Jim" instead of "the John".
Then I can say, 'I went to the Jim" this morning.


(I know I'm repeating myself, but I'm allowed to at my age).
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Old 22-10-2020, 15:13   #13352
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Re: The New Joke Thread

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That's why I started calling the toilet "the Jim" instead of "the John".
Then I can say, 'I went to the Jim" this morning.


(I know I'm repeating myself, but I'm allowed to at my age).
Hey... knock off that crap, Stu, we (the Jims of the world) resent such messing with tradition.

Jim
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Old 22-10-2020, 15:17   #13353
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Re: The New Joke Thread

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Originally Posted by a64pilot View Post
The bullet was made of wood, seems that towards the end of the war the Japanese were so short of metals that they made bullets from wood.
A common myth.

The "wooden bullet" was used in cartridges for launching rifle grenades.

See https://bulletpicker.net/pdf/Japanes...ection%20B.pdf
(Page 7 - Plate A and subsequent Sheet 1)

Also:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Type_2...enade_launcher
The Type 2 rifle grenade launcher was an attachment for the Japanese Type 38 and Type 99 rifles that allowed them to fire special hollow charge grenades. It was a version of the German Schiessbecher grenade launcher. Two grenades were produced for the launcher: a 30 mm calibre grenade and a larger 40 mm calibre grenade, both designated Type 2. The launcher sits over the end of the barrel, held in place with a clamping device. A special crimped blank cartridge or wooden bullet is used to fire the grenades.
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Old 22-10-2020, 16:51   #13354
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Re: The New Joke Thread

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Originally Posted by StuM View Post
A common myth.

The "wooden bullet" was used in cartridges for launching rifle grenades.

See https://bulletpicker.net/pdf/Japanes...ection%20B.pdf
(Page 7 - Plate A and subsequent Sheet 1)

Also:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Type_2...enade_launcher
The Type 2 rifle grenade launcher was an attachment for the Japanese Type 38 and Type 99 rifles that allowed them to fire special hollow charge grenades. It was a version of the German Schiessbecher grenade launcher. Two grenades were produced for the launcher: a 30 mm calibre grenade and a larger 40 mm calibre grenade, both designated Type 2. The launcher sits over the end of the barrel, held in place with a clamping device. A special crimped blank cartridge or wooden bullet is used to fire the grenades.
yes, but if you do just a little Googling You’ll find that there were different wooden bullets used in time of shortage.
the wooden bullets used for grenades etc were concave or hollow and would blow apart almost immedately.
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Old 22-10-2020, 17:09   #13355
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Re: The New Joke Thread

Wooden bullets are still being investigated today as “less lethal” ammunition.
Tend to injure rather than kill and much less likely to impact bystanders.

Oh and they’re organic so surely no-one will complain.
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Old 22-10-2020, 18:13   #13356
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Re: The New Joke Thread

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Originally Posted by a64pilot View Post
yes, but if you do just a little Googling You’ll find that there were different wooden bullets used in time of shortage.
the wooden bullets used for grenades etc were concave or hollow and would blow apart almost immediately.

Can you come up with an authoritative reference for that for Japanese ammunition? All I've ever found is speculation and third party anecdotes (almost certainly based on finding the grenade launcher munitions)



On the contrary, the reference above makes it clear that the grenade rounds where neither concave nor hollow.
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Old 22-10-2020, 18:22   #13357
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Re: The New Joke Thread

Well then perhaps he was shot with a grenade round then. It got infected and he had the scars, although they weren’t shown to me.
The Germans also had wooden bullets, and I believe even the Czechs did too. it takes backpressure to make a gas operated auto gun to function, and a recoil operated gun also has to have a projectile to create a force to cause the weapon to function, paper bullets have been used also. I believe there may have been a device to shred these wooden bullets as it was a way to fire blanks if you will. These bullets were I believe hollow.
US of course has a blank adapter to create pressure that screws onto the barrel.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wooden_bullet
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Old 22-10-2020, 19:55   #13358
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Re: The New Joke Thread

What is the difference between an unemployed person and a bullet?

The bullet still works immediately after it is fired!

There are a number of incidents where people have been shot in WWII with wooden bullets. It is very possible that the person being shot in while dropping the kids off at the pool is an urban myth or a story that has been "enhanced" to some degree. It is equally possible that it did happen for a number of reasons. Perhaps the person who fired the wooden bullet grabbed it by mistake. Perhaps the soldier ran out of traditional ammo and used what he had. Who knows? I do know that a number of the services in WWII used wooden bullets so it is certainly plausible.
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Old 22-10-2020, 20:06   #13359
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Re: The New Joke Thread

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Originally Posted by StuM View Post
Can you come up with an authoritative reference for that for Japanese ammunition? All I've ever found is speculation and third party anecdotes (almost certainly based on finding the grenade launcher munitions)



On the contrary, the reference above makes it clear that the grenade rounds where neither concave nor hollow.
Maybe we need a new thread..
' Guns'n'Googling... who has the fastest draw! '...........
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Old 22-10-2020, 20:49   #13360
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Re: The New Joke Thread

A chemist walks into a pharmacy and asks the pharmacist, “Do you have any acetylsalicylic acid?”
“You mean aspirin?” asked the pharmacist.
“That’s it! I can never remember that word.”
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Old 22-10-2020, 20:52   #13361
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Re: The New Joke Thread

A frog telephones the Psychic Hotline. His Personal Psychic Advisor tells him, “You are going to meet a beautiful young girl who will want to know everything about you.”
The frog is thrilled! “This is great! Will I meet her at a party?”
“No,” says his advisor, “in her biology class.”
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Old 22-10-2020, 21:02   #13362
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Re: The New Joke Thread

The doctor tells a woman that she has only six months to live. He advises her to marry a chemist and move to New Jersey. The woman asks, “Will this cure my illness?”
“No,” replies the doctor, “but it will make six months seem like a very long time.”
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Old 23-10-2020, 01:16   #13363
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Re: The New Joke Thread


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Old 23-10-2020, 01:35   #13364
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Re: The New Joke Thread

Snipped from the CNN news page tonight as presented on screen


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And while we're at it, another laugh from CNN. A sea skimmer so I'm sure Colregs questions will arise...



https://edition.cnn.com/travel/artic...lan/index.html


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Old 23-10-2020, 02:12   #13365
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Re: The New Joke Thread

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Reminds me of one day sailing out of Cairns, just off to port was an Airfish-8 WIG doing circuits.


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