Cruisers Forum
 


Reply
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread Rating: Thread Rating: 6 votes, 4.83 average. Display Modes
Old 30-09-2020, 22:42   #12841
Senior Cruiser
 
StuM's Avatar

Cruisers Forum Supporter

Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: Port Moresby,Papua New Guinea
Boat: FP Belize Maestro 43 and OPB
Posts: 10,735
Re: The New Joke Thread

Quote:
Originally Posted by socaldmax View Post
My kids want to buy this mask for my blind Aunt.. I don't know whether to laugh or cut them out of the will..

What mask? Is this another missing image?
StuM is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 30-09-2020, 22:52   #12842
Senior Cruiser
 
StuM's Avatar

Cruisers Forum Supporter

Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: Port Moresby,Papua New Guinea
Boat: FP Belize Maestro 43 and OPB
Posts: 10,735
Re: The New Joke Thread

Quote:
Originally Posted by socaldmax View Post
I'm confused...

the FRENCH fleet? Were they flying the Spanish or Portuguese flag?

The Battle of the Nile was against a French fleet.
The Battle of Trafalgar was against a combined French-Spanish fleet.
It was a French sniper (firing from a French ship) that killed him.
StuM is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 30-09-2020, 23:21   #12843
Registered User

Join Date: Jun 2020
Location: Mainly aboard currently New Zealand
Boat: Custom steel schooner 15m oa
Posts: 159
Re: The New Joke Thread

What's 10" long with an arrow through it?










Custer's last stand
sailorphil9 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 30-09-2020, 23:26   #12844
Registered User

Join Date: Jun 2020
Location: Mainly aboard currently New Zealand
Boat: Custom steel schooner 15m oa
Posts: 159
Re: The New Joke Thread

Quote:
Originally Posted by StuM View Post
What mask? Is this another missing image?

Sadly not seeing the last dozen or so of Socaldmax's images, despite refreshes, logouts/ins, editing of the page source https urls etc.
sailorphil9 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 30-09-2020, 23:45   #12845
Registered User

Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: S. Oregon
Boat: '71 Cruise-A-Home Corsair 40' & Fiberform 28'
Posts: 62
Re: The New Joke Thread

Custer wore Arrow shirts.
goguygo is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 01-10-2020, 00:11   #12846
Senior Cruiser
 
StuM's Avatar

Cruisers Forum Supporter

Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: Port Moresby,Papua New Guinea
Boat: FP Belize Maestro 43 and OPB
Posts: 10,735
Re: The New Joke Thread

Quote:
Originally Posted by sailorphil9 View Post
Sadly not seeing the last dozen or so of Socaldmax's images, despite refreshes, logouts/ins, editing of the page source https urls etc.

The domain that hosts the funny images he keeps linking to is a dog.


Not only does it frequently return "Forbidden" notices to a lot of links when it's up, but what's worse, once again isitdownrightnow.com reports:



Glamisdunes.com is DOWN for everyone.
It is not just you. The server is not responding...
StuM is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-10-2020, 04:25   #12847
Registered User
 
LakeSuperior's Avatar

Join Date: Jan 2008
Boat: Teak Yawl, 37'
Posts: 2,636
Images: 7
Re: The New Joke Thread

Someone keyed the music teacherís car

Fortunately, the damage seems to B minor.
LakeSuperior is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-10-2020, 04:26   #12848
Registered User
 
LakeSuperior's Avatar

Join Date: Jan 2008
Boat: Teak Yawl, 37'
Posts: 2,636
Images: 7
Re: The New Joke Thread

If you open a camp to help kids with ADHD

Is it a concentration camp?
LakeSuperior is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-10-2020, 04:27   #12849
Registered User
 
LakeSuperior's Avatar

Join Date: Jan 2008
Boat: Teak Yawl, 37'
Posts: 2,636
Images: 7
Re: The New Joke Thread

Pre means before and post means after.

To use both at the same time would be...

...preposterous??
LakeSuperior is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-10-2020, 04:33   #12850
Registered User
 
LakeSuperior's Avatar

Join Date: Jan 2008
Boat: Teak Yawl, 37'
Posts: 2,636
Images: 7
Re: The New Joke Thread

And last but not least...


Yoda and Luke are walking through the swamp. Part of their usual training course involves shimmying along a cliff ledge, but today, there's a long break in the ledge they can't cross.

"Something for this, I have." Yoda says. He reaches into his bag and takes out a bunch of regular dinner table forks and a roll of duct tape. He tapes several forks together to make a bridge and lays it down, allowing the two of them to get across.

When they get back to Yoda's hovel, they find that some creature has chewed a hole in the fence around Yoda's garden. "Something for this, I have." Yoda says again. Once again, he takes a bunch of forks out of his bag and, using duct tape, tapes them in to patch the hole.

Yoda and Luke return to Yoda's home, where Yoda looks through his bag. He's used all his forks but one, he discovers.

"That's ok Master." Luke says, wanting to be helpful. "I'll write us a note reminding us to buy more." So he writes the note and uses the very last fork to pin it to the bulletin board.

He looks down at Yoda expecting pride, but instead finds a look of horror. "Master Yoda!" he asks. "What did I do wrong?"

Yoda replies sagely, ďA Jedi uses the forks for no ledge and the fence. Never for a tack!
LakeSuperior is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-10-2020, 07:24   #12851
Registered User

Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: Steinhatchee, FL
Posts: 62
Re: The New Joke Thread

Quote:
Originally Posted by socaldmax View Post
Back in near the dawn of time when I was an application programmer I considered this exact problem (in hexadecimal of course). 2B or not(2b) evaluates to FF. In COBOL this is referred to as "high values".



Considering the fact that he was contemplating death, I felt that "high values" was a surprisingly appropriate answer.
Be Free is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-10-2020, 09:31   #12852
Registered User

Join Date: Jan 2019
Boat: Beneteau 432, C&C Landfall 42, Roberts Offshore 38
Posts: 1,617
Re: The New Joke Thread

yes, even during combat, Nelson liked to parade around his ship in full dress uniform with all his various medals glinting in the sunlight......he was an easy target for a sniper...

he was quite the ladies man as well........I've read that he was pickled in a cask of rum for the trip home....

myself, I prefer the rum inside my body......
MicHughV is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-10-2020, 09:37   #12853
Registered User

Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Florida, Daytona
Boat: Cabo Rico 38
Posts: 96
Re: The New Joke Thread

I must be a nerd - this is the funniest thing in a while here....
Quote:
Originally Posted by socaldmax View Post
Afrinus is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-10-2020, 09:48   #12854
Registered User

Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: San Diego, CA
Posts: 6,338
Re: The New Joke Thread

Quote:
Originally Posted by MicHughV View Post
yes, even during combat, Nelson liked to parade around his ship in full dress uniform with all his various medals glinting in the sunlight......he was an easy target for a sniper...

he was quite the ladies man as well........I've read that he was pickled in a cask of rum for the trip home....

myself, I prefer the rum inside my body......
The French military's nickname of "Cheese eating surrender monkeys" must have been earned at some point later in time.
socaldmax is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-10-2020, 12:28   #12855
Senior Cruiser
 
GordMay's Avatar

Cruisers Forum Supporter

Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Thunder Bay, Ontario - 48-29N x 89-20W
Boat: (Cruiser Living On Dirt)
Posts: 39,128
Images: 241
Re: The New Joke Thread

Quote:
Originally Posted by socaldmax View Post
The French military's nickname of "Cheese eating surrender monkeys" must have been earned at some point later in time.
Indeed. Around 1995, on "The Simpsons".
__________________
Gord May
"If you didn't have the time or money to do it right in the first place, when will you get the time/$ to fix it?"



GordMay is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Tags
boat

Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search
Display Modes Rate This Thread
Rate This Thread:

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off


Advertise Here


All times are GMT -7. The time now is 00:22.


Google+
Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.8 Beta 1
Copyright ©2000 - 2020, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Social Knowledge Networks
Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.8 Beta 1
Copyright ©2000 - 2020, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.

ShowCase vBulletin Plugins by Drive Thru Online, Inc.