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Old 02-07-2020, 11:59   #11581
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Re: The New Joke Thread

A boy and a man are sitting on a couch.

The boy says to the man, "Yeah, well, I didnít believe in reincarnation when I was your age either."
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Old 02-07-2020, 12:00   #11582
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Re: The New Joke Thread

My pet spider got sick today...

I checked his symptoms on WebMD
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Old 02-07-2020, 12:15   #11583
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Re: The New Joke Thread

Cop" Please get out of the car, you look inebriated"
Me" I'm too drunk, you get in !! "
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Old 02-07-2020, 17:06   #11584
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Re: The New Joke Thread

Quote:
Originally Posted by socaldmax View Post
On purpose, right?
Not Muphry's Law! [q.v]
That's what they wrote on their website:

http://wanderersrest.com.au/
"Wanderers Rest on Kangaroo Island is a small, four star, seaside country guest house offering Great hospitality and freindly service."

(pardon my bold)
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Old 02-07-2020, 19:33   #11585
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Re: The New Joke Thread

Quote:
Originally Posted by StuM View Post
Not Muphry's Law! [q.v]
That's what they wrote on their website:

http://wanderersrest.com.au/
"Wanderers Rest on Kangaroo Island is a small, four star, seaside country guest house offering Great hospitality and freindly service."

(pardon my bold)


Actually, the web site contains enough errors to make a copy-editor gibber.
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Old 02-07-2020, 21:18   #11586
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Re: The New Joke Thread

Gibbering frantically......
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Old 02-07-2020, 23:07   #11587
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Re: The New Joke Thread

Quote:
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Gibbering frantically......

Yes, they are a little prone to that.
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Old 02-07-2020, 23:35   #11588
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Re: The New Joke Thread

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Yes, they are a little prone to that.
I resemble that remark..!!
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Old 02-07-2020, 23:46   #11589
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Re: The New Joke Thread

Quote:
Originally Posted by Buzzman View Post
I resemble that remark..!!

I thought you might.
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Old 03-07-2020, 00:05   #11590
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Re: The New Joke Thread

Thththththththththththth

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Old 03-07-2020, 05:36   #11591
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The New Joke Thread

Quote:
Originally Posted by Buzzman View Post
Thththththththththththth



Dried-frog pills for you.
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Old 03-07-2020, 06:24   #11592
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Re: The New Joke Thread

I entered my Chihuahua in an 'ugliest dog' contest and I won first place!

My dog came in third.
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Old 03-07-2020, 06:25   #11593
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Re: The New Joke Thread

My brother and I often laugh at how competitive we are.

I laugh more...
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Old 03-07-2020, 06:25   #11594
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Re: The New Joke Thread

One day the first grade teacher was reading the story of Chicken Little to her class. She came to the part of the story where Chicken Little tried to warn the farmer.

She read, ".... and so Chicken Little went up to the farmer and said, "The sky is falling, the sky is falling!" The teacher paused then asked the class, "And what do you think that farmer said?"

One little girl raised her hand and said, "I think he said: 'Holy ****! A talking chicken!'"
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Old 03-07-2020, 11:25   #11595
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Re: The New Joke Thread

My wife asked what I was doing today, so I replied "nothing"....
So she immediately asks me to do some "honey do's"
So I had to explain that doing nothing, does not mean I'm free to other stuff...as I'm busy doing" nothing".....

Sometimes, doing a " nothing" project takes all day......
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