The New Joke Thread

[Eigenvector]

There you are.....................

[laakshi]

Originally Posted by SVArgo

Two old friends are sitting at a bar having a few beers. One friend looks down the end of the bar and laughs. He nudges his buddy and says, "see those two crusty old drunk bastards? That's us in 20 years!" His friend replies, "that's a mirror, moron."

Sent from my LG-E980 using Cruisers Sailing Forum mobile app

Lol, kinda cringe but funny as well!

[bobnlesley]

Originally Posted by GILow

...did about half a dozen engine changes on our old Kombi van. To this day I still recognise the smell of a cooked VW engine from five miles away.

Many years ago I fixed/serviced a kombi van in eastern Turkey that was running on only 1.5 cylinders for some Kiwi lads. They'd apparently done 17,000 miles since buying it in London and never checked/done a thing to it and didn't even know if it'd been serviced when they bought it and set off.
Whilst searching through their 'spare parts box' for the points and condensers, I came across a 5-gallon jerry-jug, some high pressure hose a selection of jubilee clips and a small bottle of rad-weld; these they told me were in case of any coolant/water leaks.

[socaldmax]

[socaldmax]

[socaldmax]

[socaldmax]

[Buzzman]

She was only a stableman's daughter...


But all the horse manure!

[LakeSuperior]

Thanks to being furloughed I have finally had time to clean out my attic.

I haven't cleaned it, but I have had time.

[LakeSuperior]

What’s the difference between a step stool and a 3D printer?

The former is a ladder and the latter is a former.

[socaldmax]

[socaldmax]

[a64pilot]

This is a true story, at the time my Backseater was an honest to God comedian, he came up with stuff to do that was just astounding.
He came back from Med Clinic with a prophylactic in his hand and asks what can we do with this? Some one said put in the pocket of the Captains jacket, Dave thought for a second and took it, opened the packet threw the rubber away and put the empty package in his jacket pocket and said he might could explain the whole thing but his Wife isn’t going to buy an empty package.

[IslandHopper]

WHAT a huge relief!!! Covid Free!!!

[Montanan]

Please accept my apologizes.