Cruisers Forum
 


Join CruisersForum Today

Reply
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread Rating: Thread Rating: 5 votes, 4.80 average. Display Modes
Old 30-04-2020, 10:13   #10021
Registered User

Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: TX
Boat: Whitby 42
Posts: 219
Re: The New Joke Thread

Heard a rumor that due to the problems caused by the corona virus and to give people a chance to recover the president will delay the start of the hurricane season.
__________________

BobHorn is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 30-04-2020, 10:48   #10022
Registered User

Join Date: Aug 2019
Posts: 488
Re: The New Joke Thread

Quote:
Originally Posted by BobHorn View Post
Heard a rumor that due to the problems caused by the corona virus and to give people a chance to recover the president will delay the start of the hurricane season.
wow!! between mass media, social media, and fake news , This is not going to be good. Poseidon has many accounts on facebook. He is in charge of the seas and the weather. He has short temper. these are know facts . Google him. Or just ask him. he will let you know. watch where the wind blows now.
__________________

__________________
have fun-stay safe=stay home
smbdyiam2 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 30-04-2020, 11:06   #10023
Registered User
 
carlosproa's Avatar

Join Date: May 2011
Location: Miami
Boat: EDELCAT33
Posts: 340
Images: 2
Re: The New Joke Thread

Click image for larger version

Name:	IMG_4909.jpg
Views:	168
Size:	468.9 KB
ID:	214093
carlosproa is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 30-04-2020, 11:30   #10024
Registered User

Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: WY / Currently in Hayes VA on the Chesapeake
Boat: Ocean Alexander, Ocean 44
Posts: 1,050
Re: The New Joke Thread

Quote:
Originally Posted by ArmyDaveNY View Post
Small? In today's wacky world I think we're supposed to use the phrase Volumetrically challenged!
I've changed them on a John Deere tractor that had a 7 inch bore and a 11 inch stroke. Everyone should know that your manliness is related to the number of pistons one has. My father and I agreed when adding ours up (because all of life is a competition) that the John Deere's cylinders counted for 2 of normal jugs and 10 model airplane engines. He beat me by one because he counted the pistons in his v twin air compressor. I cried foul but my brother sided with dad.
darylat8750 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 30-04-2020, 12:11   #10025
Registered User

Join Date: Aug 2019
Posts: 488
Re: The New Joke Thread

Quote:
Originally Posted by carlosproa View Post
wasn't me I'm Sleepy
wife says I'm Grumpy
Kids just say I'm Dopey
__________________
have fun-stay safe=stay home
smbdyiam2 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 30-04-2020, 13:54   #10026
Senior Cruiser
 
GordMay's Avatar

Cruisers Forum Supporter

Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Thunder Bay, Ontario - 48-29N x 89-20W
Boat: (Cruiser Living On Dirt)
Posts: 38,198
Images: 241
Re: The New Joke Thread

__________________
Gord May
"If you didn't have the time or money to do it right in the first place, when will you get the time/$ to fix it?"



GordMay is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 30-04-2020, 13:58   #10027
Senior Cruiser
 
GordMay's Avatar

Cruisers Forum Supporter

Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Thunder Bay, Ontario - 48-29N x 89-20W
Boat: (Cruiser Living On Dirt)
Posts: 38,198
Images: 241
Re: The New Joke Thread

No finger-pointing, please.

__________________
Gord May
"If you didn't have the time or money to do it right in the first place, when will you get the time/$ to fix it?"



GordMay is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 30-04-2020, 14:19   #10028
Registered User
 
japawil's Avatar

Join Date: Apr 2017
Location: Southern CA
Boat: Alajuela 33
Posts: 22
Re: The New Joke Thread

A boy is selling fish on a corner. To get his customers' attention, he is yelling, "Dam fish for sale! Get your dam fish here!" A pastor hears this and asks, "Why are you calling them 'dam fish.'" The boy responds, "Because I caught these fish at the local dam." The pastor buys a couple fish, takes them home to his wife, and asks her to cook the dam fish. The wife responds surprised, "I didn't know it was acceptable for a preacher to speak that way." He explains to her why they are dam fish. Later at the dinner table, he asks his son to pass the dam fish. He responds, "That's the spirit, Dad! Now pass the f*cking potatoes!"
japawil is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 30-04-2020, 14:21   #10029
Registered User
 
japawil's Avatar

Join Date: Apr 2017
Location: Southern CA
Boat: Alajuela 33
Posts: 22
Re: The New Joke Thread

Instead of "the John," I call my toilet "the Jim." That way it sounds better when I say I go to the Jim first thing every morning.
japawil is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 30-04-2020, 14:51   #10030
Senior Cruiser
 
GordMay's Avatar

Cruisers Forum Supporter

Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Thunder Bay, Ontario - 48-29N x 89-20W
Boat: (Cruiser Living On Dirt)
Posts: 38,198
Images: 241
Re: The New Joke Thread

__________________
Gord May
"If you didn't have the time or money to do it right in the first place, when will you get the time/$ to fix it?"



GordMay is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 30-04-2020, 14:54   #10031
Senior Cruiser
 
GordMay's Avatar

Cruisers Forum Supporter

Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Thunder Bay, Ontario - 48-29N x 89-20W
Boat: (Cruiser Living On Dirt)
Posts: 38,198
Images: 241
Re: The New Joke Thread

__________________
Gord May
"If you didn't have the time or money to do it right in the first place, when will you get the time/$ to fix it?"



GordMay is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 30-04-2020, 15:11   #10032
Bailing as fast as I can.
 
GILow's Avatar

Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Adelaide, South Australia
Boat: Swanson 42
Posts: 6,661
Re: The New Joke Thread

One the Aussies will relate to...


https://chaser.com.au/general-news/c...-second-phone/
__________________
Count-down has commenced.
GILow is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 30-04-2020, 16:01   #10033
Moderator
 
Jim Cate's Avatar

Join Date: May 2008
Location: cruising SW Pacific
Boat: Jon Sayer 1-off 46 ft fract rig sloop strip plank in W Red Cedar
Posts: 16,495
Re: The New Joke Thread

Quote:
Originally Posted by GILow View Post
Oh boy, Matt, thanks for that link! Them there guys are FUNNY, and I'm only an ersatz Aussie... but I once had to contact Centrelink... 'nuff said!

Jim
__________________
Jim and Ann s/v Insatiable II lying Port Cygnet again, freezing our bums off.
Jim Cate is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 30-04-2020, 16:09   #10034
Moderator
 
a64pilot's Avatar

Cruisers Forum Supporter

Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: Jacksonville/ out cruising
Boat: Island Packet 38
Posts: 31,016
Re: The New Joke Thread

Quote:
Originally Posted by StuM View Post
Carl Gustav 84mm Recoilless Rifle. They've been in general use around the world for about 70 years.
Known as the M3 in the US military.

The latest iteration is the M3E1
US Army Acquires M3E1 Re-Usable Missile System Ė Warfare.Today

Interesting, the linked article speaks of it as a missile system, and the system itís replacing, the AT4 is a missile system, but firing missiles out of guns is nothing new, but itís not usually very successful, the Shillelagh (sp) missile system for example.
a64pilot is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 30-04-2020, 16:09   #10035
Senior Cruiser
 
GordMay's Avatar

Cruisers Forum Supporter

Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Thunder Bay, Ontario - 48-29N x 89-20W
Boat: (Cruiser Living On Dirt)
Posts: 38,198
Images: 241
Re: The New Joke Thread

Quote:
Originally Posted by GILow View Post
Exquisite! And I don't even have half an idea what Centrelink might be.
I’ll be following The Chaser, from now on. ➥ https://chaser.com.au/
Even their “ halfbaked plan to stay solvent” makes sense.
Quote:
This is the Chaser's halfbaked plan to stay solvent
The Chaser is editorially independent, our stories are free from the influence of billionaires (unless they want to give us $100 - then we’ll print whatever they like). Unlike many others we haven’t put up a paywall because we know you wouldn’t pay for this garbage. But the revenue we get from advertising is falling, so we'd love it if you could throw us a few bucks to help us keep our writers alive.
__________________

__________________
Gord May
"If you didn't have the time or money to do it right in the first place, when will you get the time/$ to fix it?"



GordMay is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

« SSSSM - Part Deux | - »
Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search
Display Modes Rate This Thread
Rate This Thread:

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off


Advertise Here


All times are GMT -7. The time now is 07:43.


Google+
Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.8 Beta 1
Copyright ©2000 - 2020, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Social Knowledge Networks
Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.8 Beta 1
Copyright ©2000 - 2020, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.

ShowCase vBulletin Plugins by Drive Thru Online, Inc.