The New Joke Thread

[GordMay]

[Pelagic]

Originally Posted by Jim Cate

thanks Stu, for an erudite and interesting (and kinda amusing) treatise on the dead whore/cave gambit. As a fifth line society enthusiast, I appreciate the effort of Dave and his research.

Jim

Thought I'd give it a try.

There once was a hermit named Dave,
Who kept a dead whore in his cave.
She was terrible in bed,
and gave lousy head.
But think of the money I save."

[JoeRobertJr]

I felt the need for justice...

There once was a Seaman named Dave,
Who kept a dead whore in his cave.
McGee got a lead,
A swab proved the deed,
Then Gibbs cuffed and locked Dave away.

[Montanan]

Humor is the best medicine.

[Mirage35]

Originally Posted by Montanan

Humor is the best medicine.

Or, as one late-night comic said regarding people who propose gargling with bleach to fight off viruses, "being already dead is the best medicine."

[LakeSuperior]

Historians in Ireland believe they have found their oldest ever man.

An ancient headstone has been analysed, and they found it to be for a 193 year old man called Miles from Dublin.

[LakeSuperior]

Why do people in Athens hate getting up early?

Because Dawn is tough on Greece

[LakeSuperior]

This is so true in many dimension...


A shipwrecked mariner had spent several years on a deserted island, completely alone.

Then one morning he was thrilled to see a ship offshore and a smaller vessel pulling out towards him.

When the boat grounded on the beach, the officer in charge handed the marooned sailor a bundle of newspapers and told him: “The captain said to read through these and let us know if you still want to be rescued.”

[LakeSuperior]

Couples therapist: So, what brings you two here today?

My wife: I can’t stand living with him. He’s too literal.

Me: My truck.

[Eigenvector]

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[Eigenvector]

It's got some rythm to it.............

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qvOgAPa_mkw

[ben2go]

I shart myself laughing.

[Jdege]

Antivirus mask

[Buzzman]

Sooooo.....can my computer get corona-virus...???

If so, which is the best anti-virus to protect it..???

[El Pinguino]

Meanwhile...downunder