The New Joke Thread

[LakeSuperior]

I have a bird feeder in my garden.

It's also a cat feeder.

[LakeSuperior]

I need everyone to wish me luck.

I have a meeting at the bank later and if all goes well, I will finally be out of debt.

I'm so excited I can barely put on my ski mask.

[toddster8]

Originally Posted by LakeSuperior

I have a bird feeder in my garden.

It's also a cat feeder.

It's more a Cat-Home-Entertainment-Center. They're fat, lazy wannabes. But the kestrels get a few meals out of it.

[socaldmax]

My next door neighbor has a bird feeder. It's also a squirrel feeder.

[Buzzman]

Interesting. I wasn't aware squirrels ate birds.....

[StuM]

Originally Posted by Buzzman

Interesting. I wasn't aware squirrels ate birds.....

According to NatGeo they do


https://www.nationalgeographic.org/e...edia/omnivore/


Some animals that are thought of as herbivores also eat animals. Squirrels eat mostly nuts, fruits, and seeds, but they sometimes eat insects, small birds, and other creatures.

[john61ct]

https://youtu.be/a6kLDLAg4GU

[socaldmax]

Originally Posted by StuM

According to NatGeo they do


https://www.nationalgeographic.org/e...edia/omnivore/


Some animals that are thought of as herbivores also eat animals. Squirrels eat mostly nuts, fruits, and seeds, but they sometimes eat insects, small birds, and other creatures.

I discovered that squirrels eat each other. I shot one just outside it's burrow and another one came outside and started eating it. I shot that one, too and another one appeared and started eating it. I don't recall how many I shot, but all of them were perfectly willing to start gnawing on a fallen family member.

[socaldmax]

[socaldmax]

[a64pilot]

Originally Posted by socaldmax

I discovered that squirrels eat each other. I shot one just outside it's burrow and another one came outside and started eating it. I shot that one, too and another one appeared and started eating it. I don't recall how many I shot, but all of them were perfectly willing to start gnawing on a fallen family member.

That’s ground squirrels, and likely out west. I love extremely long range shooting, and out in Nevada and other places out West is an ideal place to do it. Your so far away your not considered a threat by the squirrels so you can set up a shade and a bench rest. Of course you very often miss at real long range.
I have a 22-250 and a .204 Ruger, but due to my location was only able to do it a coupe of times.
But yes, ground squirrels that’s very common. Many animals that we didn’t think were are meat eaters, even the Chimpanzee apparently are often cannibals.
It’s like tool use, when I was a kid, the thought was only humans used tools. It was though that tool use was the ultimate example of intelligence, but since then even some fish have been found to use tools.

[svmariane]

Originally Posted by a64pilot

It’s like tool use, when I was a kid, the thought was only humans used tools. It was though that tool use was the ultimate example of intelligence, but since then even some fish have been found to use tools.

“For instance, on the planet Earth, man had always assumed that he was more intelligent than dolphins because he had achieved so much—the wheel, New York, wars and so on—whilst all the dolphins had ever done was muck about in the water having a good time. But conversely, the dolphins had always believed that they were far more intelligent than man—for precisely the same reasons.”

― Douglas Adams, The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy

[socaldmax]

I think the dolphins are far more intelligent.

Just look at their lives vs our lives.

[mako]

Damn that treadmill that killed off Douglas Adams. Why couldn’t he have just kept writing instead of exercising???

[LakeSuperior]

Last night I dreamt that I was weightless.

I was like “0mg”