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Old 05-04-2019, 05:21   #4996
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Re: The New Joke Thread

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Originally Posted by Captain Bill View Post
History tells us that man first flew heavier than air vehicles in 1903, it says nothing about when women first flew them.
... But the reason why man flew those were very likely their wives ...
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Old 05-04-2019, 05:40   #4997
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Re: The New Joke Thread

Humor is based on human tragedy.....
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Old 05-04-2019, 08:01   #4998
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Re: The New Joke Thread

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The law firm of Dewey, Cheetham & Howe

say must give credit where credit is due

https://www.cartalk.com/content/staff-credits

From the show which had a Director of Gender Studies named
Amada B. Reckondwith.



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Old 05-04-2019, 08:37   #4999
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Re: The New Joke Thread

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Originally Posted by john61ct View Post
The law firm of Dewey, Cheetham & Howe

say must give credit where credit is due

https://www.cartalk.com/content/staff-credits
I believe Dewey Cheetham and Howe are from the Three Stooges.

The Tappet Bros just borrowed them
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Old 05-04-2019, 10:59   #5000
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Re: The New Joke Thread

Probably self-deprecating their own "borrowing" 8-)
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Old 05-04-2019, 11:42   #5001
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Re: The New Joke Thread

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Originally Posted by socaldmax View Post
There must be some reason that had to be added to the label...

Children are impressionable. Harry Potter introduced Muggles to Quidditch: a team sport played while straddling broomsticks. Flying required.


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Old 06-04-2019, 04:30   #5002
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Re: The New Joke Thread

SENIORS NIGHT CHURCH BULLETIN
I Potluck Supper - Prayer and medication will follow.
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Old 06-04-2019, 04:36   #5003
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Re: The New Joke Thread

Is it plagiarism if I copy and paste another's joke?
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Old 06-04-2019, 04:38   #5004
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Re: The New Joke Thread

What the hell is this?
And why does it need such a long zipper?
.
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Old 06-04-2019, 05:22   #5005
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Re: The New Joke Thread

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Originally Posted by delmarrey View Post
What the hell is this?
And why does it need such a long zipper?
.
It's the gender partner of:
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Old 06-04-2019, 05:33   #5006
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Re: The New Joke Thread

Superman wore his underwear on the outside
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Old 06-04-2019, 06:59   #5007
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Re: The New Joke Thread

What did the black hole say after it swallowed an asteroid?

"It was good, but I wish it been a little meteor."
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Old 06-04-2019, 07:00   #5008
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Re: The New Joke Thread

When is the worst time to have a heart attack?

During a game of charades..
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Old 06-04-2019, 07:01   #5009
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Re: The New Joke Thread

Paul Revere had a chicken named Gallo. When the American Revolution was well underway, he spent several nights training the chicken secretly in his barn. When he finally felt Gallo was ready, he brought it with him to the Sons of Liberty. At first, they laughed.

“Well, now, laugh if you want, but this here is a highly trained chicken, and Gallo here will help us win the war!”

They laughed some more. One of the men spoke up, “What kind of name is Gallo, anyways?”

“Italian” said Paul Revere. A man from Italy traded it for some silver work I did for him.” He set the chicken down. “But as I said, this bird here is *highly trained!”

Another man spoke up. “Trained for what? To lay an egg in the king?” Again more laughter.

“No!” Revere was growing impatient. “Gallo here is trained to sniff out British sympathizers!”

“Lies!” Several men called out.

“It’s true, I tell you! Just wait until you see my Italian Chicken catch a Tory!”
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Old 06-04-2019, 09:52   #5010
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Re: The New Joke Thread

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