-Why doesn’t glue stick to the inside of the bottle?
-Why is it considered necessary to nail down the lid of a coffin?
-What happens if you get scared half to death twice?
-Can fat people go skinny dipping?
-Why does the sun lighten our hair, but darken our skin?
-Why does a cowboy wear two spurs? If one side of the horse goes, so does the other.
-Can you be a closet claustrophobic?
-Why can’t women put on mascara with their mouth closed?
-How come you never hear about gruntled employees?
-What are Preparation A through Preparation G?
-Why is the word “abbreviation” so long?
-Why don’t you ever see the headline “Psychic Wins Lottery”?
-After eating, do amphibians have to wait one hour before getting out of the water
-Is it possible to be totally partial?
-Why is a boxing ring square?
-In a country of free speech, why are there phone
-What’s another word for thesaurus?
-Why is it called lipstick if you can still move your lips?
-What is a “free” gift? Aren’t all gifts free?
flash a quarter when asked for ID?
-If a book about failures doesn’t sell is it a success?
-Why is it that rain drops but snow falls?
-How come there aren’t B batteries
-If a funeral procession is at night, do folks drive with their lights off?
-What’s another word for synonym?
-Why is it that when you’re driving and looking for an address, you turn down the volume on the radio
-If the post office has machines that can sort snail mail by the thousands per minute, then why do they give it to a little old man on a bike to deliver?
-When companies ship Styrofoam, what do they pack it in?
-Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavour, and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons?
-How do “Do not walk on the grass” signs get there?
-If you are cross-eyed and have dyslexia, can you read all right?
-Why is the man who invests all your money
called a broker?
-Why do black olives come in cans and green olives come in jars?
-Why do we play in recitals and recite in plays?
-If a stealth bomber crashes in a forest is there a sound?
-Is a metaphor like a simile?
-Why is the third hand on the watch called second hand?
-Before drawing boards were imvented, what did they go back to?
-If a parsley farmer is sued, do they garnish his wages?
-How do I set my laser printer on stun?
-Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?
-How is it possible to have a civil war?
-When it rains, why don’t sheep shrink?
-When sign makers go on strike, what is written on their picket signs?
-If all the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting?
-Why is the word dictionary in the dictionary?
-If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?
-Can vegetarians eat animal crackers?
-Why isn’t there a special name for the tops of your feet?
-If the #2 pencil is so popular, why is it still #2?
-Do cemetery workers prefer the graveyard shift?
-Why do you need a driver’s license
to buy liquor when you can’t drink and drive?
-If you ate pasta and antipasto, would you still be hungry?
-What do you do when an endangered animal eats endangered plants?
-If quitters never win, and winners never quit, what fool came up with “Quit while you’re ahead”?
-Do witches run spell checkers?
-Why is the alphabet in that order? Is it because of that song?
-Do hungry crows have ravenous appetites?
-If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?
-If I melt dry ice, can I take a bath without getting wet?
-If a mute swears, does his mother wash his hands?
-Do Lipton employees take coffee breaks?
-Crime doesn’t pay… does that mean that my job is a crime?
-Why do noses run and feet smell?
-If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation?
-If you work
in a hospital, can you call in sick?
-Did Noah keep his bees in archives
-Is there another word for synonym?
-How can there be self-help “groups?”
-How do a fool and his money
-How do they get the deer to cross at that yellow road sign?
-Isn’t it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do “practice”?
-If an orange is orange, why isn’t a lime called a green or a lemon called a yellow?
-How do you know when it’s time to tune your bagpipes?
-How do you know that honesty is the best policy until you have tried some of the others?
-When sign makers go on strike, is anything written on their signs?
-Why do they call it a “TV set” when you only get one?
-How do you throw away a garbage can?
-When you open a bag of cotton balls, is the top one meant to be thrown away?
-Why are all the home economics teachers divorced?
-How does a thermos know if the drink should be hot or cold?
-Where do forest rangers go to “get away from it all”?
-Why isn’t phonetic spelled the way it sounds?
-Why do they call it a “bust” when it stops right before the part of the body you’d think it would have been named after?
-How does the guy who drives the snowplough get to work
in the mornings?
-Why isn’t there mouse-flavoured cat food
-Why do they call them “buildings” when they’re already done building them?
-Do you realise how many holes there could be if people would just take the time to take the dirt out of them?
-Would a fly without wings be called a walk?
-How is it that a building burns up as it burns down?
-If a word in the dictionary were misspelled, how would we know?
-Why do they lock gas station bathrooms? Are they afraid someone will clean them?
-If nothing ever sticks to Teflon, how do they make Teflon stick to the pan?
-If Superman is so smart, then why does he wear his underpants on the outside of his trousers?
-If a turtle does not have a shell, is he homeless or naked?
-If the pen is mightier than the sword, and a picture is worth a thousand words, how dangerous is a fax?
-If knees were backwards, what would chairs look like?
-If you’re in a vehicle going the speed of light, what happens when you turn on the headlights?
-Why do they sterilise the needles for lethal injections?
-If the police arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent?
-Why didn’t Noah swat those two mosquitoes?
-Why do kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
-If you throw a cat out the car window, does it become kitty litter?
-Why do we kill people for killing people to show that killing people is wrong?
-Is it true cannibals don’t eat clowns because they taste funny
-What hair colour do they put on the driver’s licenses of bald men?
-Why is it that bullets ricochet off of Superman’s chest, but he ducks when the gun is thrown at him?
-If you shoot a mime, should you use a silencer?
-Why do banks charge you an “insufficient funds” fee on money they already know you don’t have?
-What if the Hokey Pokey IS what it’s all about?
-What is the speed of dark?
-How come we never hear about gruntled employees?
-Why do they sell cigarettes at the gas station if you can’t smoke there?
-What happened to the first 6 “ups?”