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Old 11-07-2017, 06:56   #2431
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Re: The New Joke Thread

That's what she said
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Old 11-07-2017, 08:49   #2432
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Re: The New Joke Thread

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pelagic View Post
That is a cunning trick, but those of us with a giving personality in bed, automatically knew it to be false
I would guess if you're on your back with your tongue out, you have other important things to think about! 😻
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Old 11-07-2017, 10:12   #2433
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Re: The New Joke Thread

That's what she thought.
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Old 11-07-2017, 10:35   #2434
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Re: The New Joke Thread

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Originally Posted by socaldmax View Post
That's what she thought.
They think?
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Old 11-07-2017, 15:26   #2435
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Re: The New Joke Thread

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It's extremely easy if you're lying on your back.
As the actress said to the bishop!
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Old 11-07-2017, 22:24   #2436
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Re: The New Joke Thread

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pelagic View Post
That is a cunning trick, but those of us with a giving personality in bed, automatically knew it to be false
Yeah, but you could still have a stupid smile on your face!

good one, mate!

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Old 11-07-2017, 22:27   #2437
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Re: The New Joke Thread

Oh, and I'm reminded of when I was an undergrad at Stanford, the University's debate team won a debate. The usually staid student newspaper wrote it up with this headline:

Cunning linguists devour opponents.

In those still kinda Victorian times, it was pretty risque!

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Old 11-07-2017, 23:56   #2438
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Re: The New Joke Thread

Victorian era: 1873 to 1901.
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Old 12-07-2017, 16:04   #2439
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Re: The New Joke Thread

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Originally Posted by socaldmax View Post
Victorian era: 1873 to 1901.
Stanford University: founded in 1885. So an overlap exists, right?

And Jim Cate was born.... well, do we really know when?

So its possible..... right?


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Old 12-07-2017, 16:31   #2440
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Re: The New Joke Thread

Oh, I'm not doubting it.

Just realizing how far jokes have come in the last 150 yrs.
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Old 12-07-2017, 16:44   #2441
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Re: The New Joke Thread

Young girl to father: “Daddy, what is an alcoholic?”

Dad: “Do you see those 4 trees? An alcoholic would see 8 trees.”

“Um, Dad - there are only 2 trees.”

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Old 12-07-2017, 16:46   #2442
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Re: The New Joke Thread

Same girl, years later...

"I told my dad that he should embrace his mistakes.
He had tears in his eyes.
Then he hugged my sister and me."
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Old 12-07-2017, 16:53   #2443
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Re: The New Joke Thread

This just in....

United Parcel Service {UPS} and Federal Express {FedEx}
are finalizing their merger.

The new company will be called Fed-Ups.

Film at 11....
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Old 12-07-2017, 17:13   #2444
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Re: The New Joke Thread

Pedantry is fine, when it is accurate

"still kinda Victorian times"

Dictionary.doc:
Victorian:
adjective 1.of or relating to Queen Victoria or the period of her reign: Victorian poets.
2.having the characteristics usually attributed to the Victorians, especially prudishness and observance of the conventionalities.

Merriam Webster:
Definition of Victorian
1
: of, relating to, or characteristic of the reign of Queen Victoria of England or the art, letters, or tastes of her time
2
: typical of the moral standards, attitudes, or conduct of the age of Victoria especially when considered stuffy, prudish, or hypocritical
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Old 12-07-2017, 20:54   #2445
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Re: The New Joke Thread

Quote:
Originally Posted by StuM View Post
Pedantry is fine, when it is accurate

"still kinda Victorian times"

Dictionary.doc:
Victorian:
adjective 1.of or relating to Queen Victoria or the period of her reign: Victorian poets.
2.having the characteristics usually attributed to the Victorians, especially prudishness and observance of the conventionalities.

Merriam Webster:
Definition of Victorian
1
: of, relating to, or characteristic of the reign of Queen Victoria of England or the art, letters, or tastes of her time
2
: typical of the moral standards, attitudes, or conduct of the age of Victoria especially when considered stuffy, prudish, or hypocritical
Thanks, Stu... I'm glad someone around these parts is literate...

And for the record, no, I was not born. According to my good ole mother, I was found under a cabbage leaf, and the animal rescue folks wouldn't take me in...

Jim
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