Cruisers Forum
 


Closed Thread
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread Rating: Thread Rating: 11 votes, 4.45 average. Display Modes
Old 12-11-2014, 00:49   #4126
Moderator
 
carstenb's Avatar

Cruisers Forum Supporter

Join Date: May 2012
Location: At sea in the pacific - 5 years full time blue water cruising
Boat: Jeanneau Sun Fast 40.3
Posts: 5,444
Images: 1
Re: The Joke Thread

Quote:
Originally Posted by Coops View Post
DLD.

Coops.
ok

I don't get it

What are they thinking?
__________________
I must go down to the seas again, to the lonely sea and the sky,
And all I ask is a tall ship and a star to steer her by

www.svcapri.com
carstenb is offline  
Old 12-11-2014, 01:28   #4127
Moderator
 
Seaworthy Lass's Avatar

Cruisers Forum Supporter

Join Date: Oct 2008
Boat: Bestevaer 49
Posts: 14,416
Re: The Joke Thread

Quote:
Originally Posted by carstenb View Post
ok

I don't get it

What are they thinking?
"Don't look down", I guess
__________________
Unveiling Bullseye strops for low friction rings
"To me the simple act of tying a knot is an adventure in unlimited space." Clifford Ashley
"The cure for anything is salt water: sweat, tears or the sea." Isak Dinesen
Seaworthy Lass is offline  
Old 12-11-2014, 01:33   #4128
Moderator
 
carstenb's Avatar

Cruisers Forum Supporter

Join Date: May 2012
Location: At sea in the pacific - 5 years full time blue water cruising
Boat: Jeanneau Sun Fast 40.3
Posts: 5,444
Images: 1
Re: The Joke Thread

aha!
__________________
I must go down to the seas again, to the lonely sea and the sky,
And all I ask is a tall ship and a star to steer her by

www.svcapri.com
carstenb is offline  
Old 12-11-2014, 08:49   #4129
Registered User
 
LakeSuperior's Avatar

Join Date: Jan 2008
Boat: Teak Yawl, 37'
Posts: 2,635
Images: 7
Re: The Joke Thread

I was wondering if anyone on CF heard the joke about the cannibal who passed his friend in the jungle?
LakeSuperior is offline  
Old 12-11-2014, 08:52   #4130
Registered User
 
LakeSuperior's Avatar

Join Date: Jan 2008
Boat: Teak Yawl, 37'
Posts: 2,635
Images: 7
Re: The Joke Thread

I was watching professional poker on TV and I saw a leper card player throw his hand in.
LakeSuperior is offline  
Old 12-11-2014, 11:45   #4131
Registered User
 
Finistere's Avatar

Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Bear, DE
Boat: Island Packet 37 - Finistere
Posts: 233
Re: The Joke Thread

Sven and Ole were fishing on the shore of Mille Lacs when Sven pulled out a cigar.
Finding he had No matches, he asked Ole for a light.
'Ya, sure, I tink I haff a lighter,' Ole replied and then reaching into his tackle
box, he pulled out a Bic lighter 10 inches long.
'Wow, dats a big lighter ya got der!' exclaimed Sven, taking the huge Bic lighter in his hands. 'Where'd yew git dat monster?'
'Well,' replied Ole, 'I got it from my Genie.'
'You haff a gol darn Genie?' Sven asked.
'Ya, sure. It's right here in my tackle box,' says Ole.
'Could I see him?'
Ole opens his tackle box and sure enough, out pops the Genie.
Addressing the Genie, Sven says, 'Hey der! I'm a good pal of your master.
Will you grant me one wish?'
'Yes, I will,' says the Genie.
So Sven asks the Genie for a million bucks.


The Genie disappears back into the tackle box leaving Sven sitting there waiting for his million bucks.
Shortly, the sky darkens and is filled with the sound of a million ducks flying directly overhead.
Over the roar of the one million ducks Sven yells at Ole, 'What da hell? I asked for a million bucks, not a million ducks!'
Ole answers, 'Ya, I forgot to tell yew dat da Genie is hard of hearing. Do yew really tink I asked for a 10 inch Bic?'


Sent from my iPad using Cruisers Sailing Forum
Finistere is offline  
Old 13-11-2014, 16:06   #4132
D&D
Marine Service Provider
 
D&D's Avatar

Cruisers Forum Supporter

Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: Blue Mountains, Australia
Boat: now skippering Syd Harbour charters
Posts: 1,544
Re: The Joke Thread

An old WD40 advert...and a real reminder of how far our 'PC' standards are moved....

Click image for larger version

Name:	nits & tool.jpg
Views:	366
Size:	105.2 KB
ID:	91564
D&D is offline  
Old 13-11-2014, 16:14   #4133
Registered User

Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: San Diego, CA
Posts: 6,333
Re: The Joke Thread

Back when real men worked on Madison Ave.!
socaldmax is online now  
Old 13-11-2014, 16:29   #4134
Registered User
 
Cormorant's Avatar

Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Catskill Mountains when not cruising
Boat: 31' homebuilt Michalak-designed Cormorant "Sea Fever"
Posts: 2,100
Re: The Joke Thread

That WD-40 ad seems to be a fake. A very funny fake, but still. . . .

snopes.com: 1964 WD-40 Ad Full of Sexual Innuendo
Cormorant is offline  
Old 13-11-2014, 22:40   #4135
D&D
Marine Service Provider
 
D&D's Avatar

Cruisers Forum Supporter

Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: Blue Mountains, Australia
Boat: now skippering Syd Harbour charters
Posts: 1,544
Re: The Joke Thread

Quote:
Originally Posted by Cormorant View Post
That WD-40 ad seems to be a fake. A very funny fake, but still. . . .

snopes.com: 1964 WD-40 Ad Full of Sexual Innuendo
Ah well...we suspected as much, but let it 'slip through to the keeper' on the basis that it was, as you say, very funny...
D&D is offline  
Old 13-11-2014, 22:54   #4136
Moderator Emeritus
 
Coops's Avatar

Cruisers Forum Supporter

Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Northern NSW.Australia
Boat: Sunmaid 20, John Welsford Navigator
Posts: 9,550
Re: The Joke Thread

Wonder if Badger's Arse toilet paper is real then.

Badger's Arse Industrial Toilet Paper - VIZ

Coops.
__________________
When somebody told me that I was delusional, I almost fell off of my unicorn.
Coops is offline  
Old 14-11-2014, 00:34   #4137
Moderator
 
Jim Cate's Avatar

Join Date: May 2008
Location: cruising SW Pacific
Boat: Jon Sayer 1-off 46 ft fract rig sloop strip plank in W Red Cedar
Posts: 17,089
Re: The Joke Thread

Quote:
Originally Posted by Coops View Post
Wonder if Badger's Arse toilet paper is real then.

Badger's Arse Industrial Toilet Paper - VIZ

Coops.
Gawd, Coops, that's funny!

I dunno if Badger's Arse is real, but in the real world there are some odd materials used for this purpose. In my former life, I had several periods where I spent some time at AWRE, the British nuclear research site. The paper in the bogs there was government issue and almost unusable. Each and every square was imprinted with a very official emblem and the words " On her Majesty's service". As a visiting Yank, I thought that odd... and kinda funny, too!

Jim
__________________
Jim and Ann s/v Insatiable II, back in Port Cygnet after adventures in the big smoke.
Jim Cate is online now  
Old 14-11-2014, 05:53   #4138
One of Those
 
Canibul's Avatar

Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Colorado
Boat: Catalac 12M (sold)
Posts: 3,221
Re: The Joke Thread

no ****?
__________________
Expat life in the Devil's Triangle:
https://2gringos.blogspot.com/
Canibul is offline  
Old 14-11-2014, 06:11   #4139
Registered User
 
GeoPowers's Avatar

Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: Gulfport, MS
Boat: Beneteau 393
Posts: 954
Images: 27
Re: The Joke Thread

Two cell phones meet in a crowded subway. They date, fall in love, and one day get married. The ceremony was lackluster, but the reception was excellent!

A jumper cable walks into a bar. The bartender says, "I'll serve you, but you'd better not start anything!"

Two cows were chewing cud in a pasture. Daisy says to Dolly, "I went to the barn last night and was artificially inseminated!" "I don't believe you", says Dolly. Daisy says, "I swear it's true- no bull!!"

Frank


Sent from my iPhone using Cruisers Sailing Forum
GeoPowers is offline  
Old 14-11-2014, 07:25   #4140
Senior Cruiser
 
GordMay's Avatar

Cruisers Forum Supporter

Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Thunder Bay, Ontario - 48-29N x 89-20W
Boat: (Cruiser Living On Dirt)
Posts: 38,988
Images: 241
Re: The Joke Thread

A Roman walks into a bar and asks for a Martinus.
“You mean a martini?” the bartender asks.
The Roman replies, “If I wanted a double, I would have asked for it!”

***

C, E flat, and G walk into a bar.
The bartender says, “Sorry, no minors”
__________________
Gord May
"If you didn't have the time or money to do it right in the first place, when will you get the time/$ to fix it?"



GordMay is online now  
Closed Thread

Tags
Jokes, paracelle

Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search
Display Modes Rate This Thread
Rate This Thread:

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off


Advertise Here


All times are GMT -7. The time now is 15:26.


Google+
Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.8 Beta 1
Copyright ©2000 - 2020, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Social Knowledge Networks
Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.8 Beta 1
Copyright ©2000 - 2020, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.

ShowCase vBulletin Plugins by Drive Thru Online, Inc.