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Old 03-07-2024, 11:43   #4816
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Re: The 2021 -2024 and Continuing Joke Threads

Be thankful that it is not snowing.

Imagine shoveling snow in this heat.


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Old 06-07-2024, 04:05   #4817
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Re: The 2021 -2024 and Continuing Joke Threads

I got myself a new “seniors” GPS.
Not only does it tell me how to get to my destination, it also tells me why I wanted to go there.

I really love my new GPS.
Because now, I have two women, telling me how to drive.

The only problem it has, is looking up specific coordinates.
It has a bad latitude.
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Old 07-07-2024, 03:48   #4818
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Re: The 2021 -2024 and Continuing Joke Threads

New [Canadian] Restricted Radio Operator's license exam questions:

Q: Can radio be an addiction?
A: It depends on the frequency.

Q: What do you call an average radio?
A: Stereo typical.

Q: What do you call portable, two-way radio transceivers, that hate racism, and like to smoke pot?
A: Wokey-Tokies.
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Old 07-07-2024, 05:12   #4819
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Re: The 2021 -2024 and Continuing Joke Threads

I spent some time in Africa, and often came across some locals, who wanted to know who is the little man the lives inside a radio that talks so much ??

I had no ready response for that question...
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Old 10-07-2024, 03:05   #4820
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Re: The 2021 -2024 and Continuing Joke Threads

Some cetacean trivia, and a quiz:

TIL: It's illegal to hunt whales, in Arizona.

Sperm whales:
Could they be the reason the sea is so salty?

What's with the sudden influx of Killer Whale attacks, on boats?
It seems Orcastrated.

I had a great conversation with a dolphin. the other day.
We just... I don't know. We just clicked.


Q: How do you make a whale float?
A: Two scoops of ice cream, some root beer, and a whale.

Q: What does it take to circumcise a whale?
A: Four skin divers.

Q: What do you call a pod of singing killer whales?
A: An orcapella group.

Q: What do you call a sad whale, with erectile dysfunction?
A: Mopey Dick.

Q: Where did the whale go, when it was bankrupt?
A: To the loan shark.

Q: What do you call a dolphin, in the woods?
A: Dead.
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Old 10-07-2024, 22:32   #4821
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Re: The 2021 -2024 and Continuing Joke Threads

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Old 11-07-2024, 02:26   #4822
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Re: The 2021 -2024 and Continuing Joke Threads

Further to ➥ https://www.cruisersforum.com/forums...ml#post3916261

"Thermodynamics is a funny subject.
The first time you go through it, you don't understand it at all.
The second time you go through it, you think you understand it, except for one or two small points.
The third time you go through it, you know you don't understand it, but by that time you are so used to it, it doesn't bother you any more."

~ by Arnold Sommerfield, who was nominated for the Nobel Prize 84 times, more than any other physicist (including Otto Stern, who got nominated 82 times), but he never received the award.

Three Laws of Thermodynamics (paraphrased):
First Law: You can't get anything without working for it.
Second Law: The most you can accomplish by work is to break even.
Third Law: You can't break even.

The Fourth Law: Watt's Pots Never Boyle.
The Fifth Law: Things Get Worse Under Pressure.

Ginsberg's Theorem [a modern statement of the three laws of thermodynamics]:
1. You can't win.
2. You can't even break even.
3. You can't get out of the game.
4. THE LAW OF ENTROPY:
The perversity of the universe tends towards a maximum.

THE LAWS OF THERMODYNAMICS, for Sanitation Engineers:
There is ****.
1st: You can't get rid of it.
2nd: It gets deeper.
3rd: A nice, empty trashcan is wishful thinking.
KEEP SHOVELING!!
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Old 11-07-2024, 03:48   #4823
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Re: The 2021 -2024 and Continuing Joke Threads

Some say, ‘there are no stupid questions’; but, these [and their answers] come close:

Q: What do you get when you cross a grocery store and a scientist?
A: Market research.

Q: If an optimist sees the glass half full, and a pessimist sees the glass half empty, how does the chemist see it?
A: Completely full - half with liquid, and half with air.

Q: Why is it so hard to drive in a screw?
A: Because, it doesn't have a steering wheel.

Q: What month of the year has 28 days?
A: All of them.

Q: What causes dry skin?
A: A towel.

Q: Which word, is most commonly pronounced wrong?
A: Wrong.

Q: How much do roofs cost?
A: Nothing. They're on the house.

Q: When does Friday come before Thursday?
A: In the dictionary.

Q: What's stranger than seeing a catfish?
A: Watching a fish bowl.

Q: What do you call something that’s easy to get into, but hard to get out of?
A: Trouble.

Q: Why do ambassadors never get sick?
A: Diplomatic immunity.

Q: What do you call a joke, without a punchline?
A: Silence.
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