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Old 17-07-2010, 23:01   #1
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Location: Live Iowa - Sail mostly Bahamas
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Taking Time Off from Cruising for Family Issues

I had two big things going on this summer: 1. A lot of short term cruising. 2. My dad was undergoing treatment for cancer.

I felt uncomfortable being away from home for an extended period of time while my dad was undergoing treatment even though all indications were good. The compromise for me was to go charter for a couple weeks which was less cruising than originally planned.

I returned early to spend some time with my dad. A few days after I saw him he had a complication and died. We spread his ashes over the water from his boat a few days ago.

The main lesson for me was "balance" I'm so glad I came home early to spend time with my dad, but I also realized we should always live our own lives to the fullest. No regrets that way.

The other lesson for me was that loosing someone you are close to really sucks, but I guess it's a part of that whole circle of life thing.

- Peace and fair winds....
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Old 18-07-2010, 01:36   #2
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Sorry to hear of your loss. I had a similar experience with my grandfather some 15 years ago. In his whole life he was in hospital once in his early 50s and his next visit was at the age of 85. My mother phoned me to say that he was unwell but the hospital did not seem too concerned. I was away at the time and due to return home in a few days. I could have altered the plane ticket and gone early but I didn't and he died that night with everyone but me there. I still regret it.

You did better than me. At least you were there for your dad.
Arthur Dent: "I wish I'd listened to what my mother told me when I was younger"
Ford Prefect: "Why? What did she say?"
Arthur: "I don't know - I didn't listen!!"
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Old 18-07-2010, 01:51   #3
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The 'balance' is so difficult, but those dying are often the most un-selfish. It's what you did for them over their lifetime that counts, not how many tears you shed at their ending.
Ex Prout 31 Sailor, Now it's a 22ft Jaguar called 'Arfur' here in sunny Southampton, UK.
A few places left in Quayside Marina and Kemps Marina.
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Old 19-07-2010, 07:50   #4
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So very sorry for your loss. It was good that you were there and got to spend time with him. Fair winds and following sees and my most heartfealt sympothies to you and yours.
Barry D.
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