SSSSM - Part Deux

[Nia]

I haven't been too successful yet with finding crew, even when the picture is posted Bill. I did get an offer to live in Belize though. LMAO

[zeehag]

lol nia---keep on sailing her and ye will find them.. they will come to you.....

[Nia]

Originally Posted by HopeFloats

Lovely pic Nia!

And more picies sailing your Thistle, that's when we get the biggest smiles!

Here you go Helen! This was just emailed to me... it gives me a great big smile too!

[Nia]

Originally Posted by zeehag

lol nia---keep on sailing her and ye will find them.. they will come to you.....

There is a certain bartender who perked up when I mentioned sailing. We'll see...

[carstenb]

I never have understood why sailing women seem to have difficulty in finding men. Lots of men sail and they generally complain that it is very difficult indeed to find a woman that shares their passion.

Anyway Nia - good luck with the bartender

[Nia]

I live in a desert... its hard to find any sailors here Carsten. The club meets at that bar after every race and he hadn't noticed that we were always talking about sailboats or that our club burgee was on the wall till I mentioned it. He is young and thin enough to get around on my thistle though.

[zeehag]

finding men who adore female sailors is the problem. most males like their females a lil lame--felames--and those dont sail. we may be a lil strong and a lil independent for most males. come on guys---speak up on this...

[carstenb]

Hi Zeehag,

I'll chip in my cent and a half (male don't have 2 cents!). I've always liked women who are independent and capable of taking care of themselves. For lots of reasons
1- Its great to have some qualified "opposition". Keeps me intellectually on my toes and sometimes convinces me I'm wrong
2- Equal partners play better together
3- I don't want an anchor around my feet
4- I love adventure and all that goes with it. Only an independent woman will sign up for that.
5- Relationships are supposed to be about supporting each other.

I'm not sure if I answered your question - but why would anyone (man or woman) want a partner that doesn't stand on their own feet?

Ahhhh Nia - young and nimble bartenders (don't blush) great to find - even in a desert

[zeehag]

some men even say that they wouldnt sail on a woman's boat because she might make too many ORDERS .... is there a switch inside a man that turns off when suggestions are made by women??
when i have a smart guy--not smartass guy, on boat, i allow that man to have control of the boat....


come on , guys--wake up and participate...please....is 0720 and all is welllll....

[CPseudonym]

Originally Posted by zeehag

some men even say that they wouldnt sail on a woman's boat because she might make too many ORDERS ...

It's the whole seat up seat down thing.

[Richard5]

Originally Posted by zeehag

come on , guys--wake up and participate...please....is 0720 and all is welllll....

Zeehag, if I were to say "why?" participate what would you say? What is your purpose? Carsten pretty much nailed it.

[zeehag]

hhmm..he did, but how many agree and there are other points of view, i am sure....as for the seat up vs down--at sea--if up, stuff falls into bowl..must fetch out prior to use....

and i liked carstenb's answer--i want to know more.

[Nia]

There is some truth to what Zee says, even here in the desert. There is one gentleman I have crewed along side that has problems with believing a woman is capable and will push me aside so "he can take care of it". That can be interesting on a little boat like a thistle. It's not an age thing as he is a little older than my children. I have crewed beside him a number of times. Intellectually he knows I can do the job, but emotionally he doesn't believe it.

That isn't everyone though as there are a number of male skippers that love having me on board and even make arrangements to "share" me (morning and afternoon races) or send me a message asking if I am available when their wives wont go.

[zeehag]

nia--good one-- you have described the halting factor in men when it comes to women on boats. they want us but they dont know how to deal.....is it that men are afraid of women?? could that be the male needs to take care of the female?? is a learned behaviour, not an instinctive one when in humans.
is there a way to compromise that into a sharing situation rather than a i am gonna take care of you situation.....
also--if there are so few females cruising sola, and so many males cruising solo, why cant the two camps mingle for sharing purposes? there are so many situations in which couples owning 2 boats can create--a summer boat and a winter boat--- yard one in one place and sail the other in a different place---like, mexico and caribean....is a pita to canal it, so why not do it that way? there are so many scenarios----and i see in men the same fear of leaving comfortable grounds as i see in females....

[lookoutnw]

It may be the 'King of the Castle' thingfor most men. But then I am guessing that most men have not met any real solo sailing women. I am talking cruising types, not just the bay.
When you are on watch shifts, you have to trust the other male or female to take care of not only the boat, but you. I think this is a good test of the character of the male or female. I like to open a door now and then, and to pamper a woman, but I am not into high maintenance or deck candy. more of the 'Hey, would you help with this greasy slimy mechanical mess I got going on her or even, a would you this or that instead of the 'can you'... Of course you 'can', that is why you sail a boat. Since you sail it usually solo, man or woman, you are able to do it alone. Just having someone to do what you usually do, as in sharing the load, is much more enjoyable. Intelligence, independance, curiosity, adventurous, decent health, and down right humorous is a tall order, but it is a perscription that is fillable in today's world. Best of times to all of you today on your quests for a better, fuller life.