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Melissa36 · 12-02-2018, 15:30

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pelagic

I think the key question for both threads but especially this one is:
Is there an age when a single sailor...should remain....single?

I have friends who have been single all their lives and tell me about the pressures from family and friends to find a partner.

Once in a while their resolve weakens and they try to develop a serious relationship only to be bitterly disappointed and go back to singledom.

In a way, I admire people who have decided that daily freedom is more important than daily hugs, but as you get older, does that resolve strengthen or weaken?

Don't forget that a miriad of people who "have chosen to be alone" are players. The hookup culture is not lacking daily hugs, they just say that they are.

goat · 12-02-2018, 16:18

Quote:

Originally Posted by Melissa36

Don't forget that a miriad of people who "have chosen to be alone" are players. The hookup culture is not lacking daily hugs, they just say that they are.

Roger that. I meet those women all the time.

Melissa36 · 12-02-2018, 17:51

Quote:

Originally Posted by goat

Like pelagic, I make friends quickly, don't mind starting a conversation on the dock, love to tell a joke to a complete stranger just so they know we're all in this together.

Like the judgemental...err discerning posters, I know we are given a limited time on this earth. I won't waste that precious resource on people (men or women) whom I 'judge' to be not worth it. Fair? Who cares? There's only so many marbles in your jar of life, give them to those who deserve them.

Am I a loner dock rat? Maybe, but as long as I'm meeting new people and sharing experiences, I couldn't care less. You came into life alone and you're leaving alone, make yourself happy.

goat

Ditto

zeehag · 13-02-2018, 05:57

Quote:

Originally Posted by Melissa36

Don't forget that a miriad of people who "have chosen to be alone" are players. The hookup culture is not lacking daily hugs, they just say that they are.

from observation, i have found land dwelling women to be players, and from experience found more men on boats are players. not a positive kind, either.
i have also run into many child molesters on water. seems they cannot live near humans so they live away from em , on boats. go figger.
when i arrived here, i was advised that all men are married.
good. that is fine with me, they wont be so handsy.

wrong.

yes many of us are sola for reasons not having to do with anything other than we donot wish to be bothered.
iff there was a decent choice out here, it would be one thing. seems decent almost normal males are not out cruising.
predators are out here.
it is not a healthy mix for single ladies sail cruising. we must be most diligent in not only choices of dating material, if there is any, but in the alleged crew we choose, the alleged repair clowns out there outnumber the good guys. and you wonder why we have a hesitation regarding venturing out into dateville. hahahahaha
be less dense and less judgemental when you approach women cruising.

personally, i meet as many folks as possible, however, the truism is real.... the men out cruising solo are
married
players--married or not
child molesters
stalkers
other criminals.
married and leaving wifee home .... many reasons for leaving wifee home.
there are some really good folks out here---many other types as well, one cannot ASSume the male cruiser is a decent person.
i have met some really cool folks and some asshooligans.
no i wont date the men i meet cruising. i have yet to meet anyone worth my losing my lifestyle and boat for. this is always a concern for women cruising.

kmacdonald · 13-02-2018, 06:05

Yes Zee, the land dwellers are the problem. Miss fits I tell ya.

**weavis** · 13-02-2018, 07:03

Quote:

Originally Posted by zeehag

personally, i meet as many folks as possible, however, the truism is real.... the men out cruising solo are
married
players--married or not
child molesters
stalkers
other criminals.
married and leaving wifee home .... many reasons for leaving wifee home.
there are some really good folks out here---many other types as well, one cannot ASSume the male cruiser is a decent person.

Have you thought about changing locations or seeing a therapist? I take strong exception to your blanket statement regarding solo male sailors, so much so that you actually have made me angry with your blatant lies regarding me and other solo sailors.

I am not a player.
I am not a child molester
I am not a stalker.
I am not a criminal.

I expect an apology forthwith.

**weavis** · 13-02-2018, 07:19

If commentary on this thread cannot remain focused or HONEST... then there is no need to continue with it. I do not like to see prejudice exhibited in any form and especially attributed to either sex.

Am I to be labeled in a manner by Zee because I sail a boat solo? I refuse to accept the judgemental opinion as anything other than garbage specifically and generally from the SOLO female perspective. It smacks of feminism and political rhetoric and personal hurt from some encounter or two in the past.

YOu have attributed to me something horrible. As a professional medic, who has dealt with many of the vices of men and women and the results therefrom.

I demand an apology as a solo sailor, as a man and as someone outraged by your arrogance in stating such lies. You did not even say SOME men...

If this is to be the tone of this thread, then people like Zee are determined to end it.

Sheesh.

**boatman61** · 13-02-2018, 07:38

Quote:

Originally Posted by weavis

Have you thought about changing locations or seeing a therapist? I take strong exception to your blanket statement regarding solo male sailors, so much so that you actually have made me angry with your blatant lies regarding me and other solo sailors.

I am not a player.
I am not a child molester
I am not a stalker.
I am not a criminal.

I expect an apology forthwith.

Never took you for a 'Sensitive Soul...

Dont mess with Zee.. she'll have yer balls for earings..

cyan · 13-02-2018, 07:39

I started this thread with the honest hope of hearing from solo female sailors that could share their inspiring stories of sailing and dealing with other sailors in a such a male-dominated activity. I was hoping for a few uplifting tales to share with my daughter, a free spirit and a new sailor. Alas, I'll share very little with her. In her 20s, she already has an excellent filter where she ignores the "people suck" characters and can identify solid citizens like Pelagic.
This thread was a mistake, perhaps.

**weavis** · 13-02-2018, 07:44

Quote:

Originally Posted by boatman61

Never took you for a 'Sensitive Soul...

Dont mess with Zee.. she'll have yer balls for earings..

Naah. Everyone can conform to decency without slander on this CF thread or find another place for the prejudice.

Is it REALLY THAT HARD to have a discussion without all this static?

Feel sorry for cyan.

**boatman61** · 13-02-2018, 07:47

Weavis your over reacting.. many were surprised about Rolf Harris.. the general public were gobsmacked by Jimmy Saville and DLT.. TV and radio saints for so long.
Seem to remember she said there are good and bad..
Personally I knew a guy in Fuengirola who sailed away with a couples 14yr old daughter back in 97..
Go back to bed and climb out of the other side.

**weavis** · 13-02-2018, 07:50

Quote:

Originally Posted by boatman61

Weavis your over reacting.. many were surprised about Rolf Harris.. the general public were gobsmacked by Jimmy Saville and DLT.. TV and radio saints for so long.
Seem to remember she said there are good and bad..
Personally I knew a guy in Fuengirola who sailed away with a couples 14yr old daughter back in 97..
Go back to bed and climb out of the other side.

She labelled ALL solo sailors. the guys you mentioned were few in number.

I guess it includes you... wait you are special... you get a pass go card...

zeehag · 13-02-2018, 07:52

weavis, dahhlingk, i DID say there ARE decent folks on water. however, those sailing from many warm water ports are included in the mix.

because we are in the fat part of the bell curve doesnot mean there are not personas malas out HERE.
water attracts many types of personalities.
fact.
because some kinds of weirdos ar e mentioned doesnot mean all out here are such. remember i DID say there are some decent folks out here as well.

so next time i will list all plus weavis. hahahahaha. that way you are specifically included. i thought i was including ye with the some decent people phrase, but i guess i was told off for that. oopsy. my error.

ps.... i am not slandering anyone anywhere. these are hard facts. can be backed up any where on planet.

john61ct · 13-02-2018, 07:53

I also find what zee hag wrote offensive.
However, less so than what many have generalized here about women without any censure.

Whether from experience, socialization or education, zee hag feels that many men are predators of women and children. Unfortunately that is objectively true, wherever you feel "some" transitions to "many" percentage wise is the subjective part.

And she has the right to act and advise as she sees fit based on her view of the world.

_____
Nobody has the right to not be offended. That right doesn't exist in any declaration I have ever read.

If you are offended it is your problem, and frankly lots of things offend lots of people.

I can walk into a bookshop and point out a number of books that I find very unattractive in what they say. But it doesn't occur to me to burn the bookshop down. If you don't like a book, read another book. If you start reading a book and you decide you don't like it, nobody is telling you to finish it.

— Salman Rushdie