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15-02-2018, 11:21
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#212
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Moderator

Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: UK-Mallorca
Posts: 13,278
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Re: Single Women Living Aboard and Cruising... an honest look
Doesnt that make them both untruth tellers?
Fair is fair.
__________________
- Never test how deep the water is with both feet -
10% of conflicts are due to different opinions. 90% by the tone of voice.
Raise your words, not your voice. It is rain that grows flowers, not thunder.
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15-02-2018, 11:27
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#213
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Freelance Delivery Skipper..


Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: PORTUGAL
Posts: 25,670
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Re: Single Women Living Aboard and Cruising... an honest look
Quote:
Originally Posted by weavis
Doesnt that make them both untruth tellers?
Fair is fair.
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All depends on whether your a Republican, a Democrat or a Corporate representative.. one mans liar is another mans saint.
Perspectives are everything as Sein Fein and the DUP can tell you.
Lets face it Gary.. Spain and Portugal are very mature about these things.
They don't have kids, just small grown ups.
__________________
Born To Be Wild.. Double Click on the picture.
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15-02-2018, 11:30
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#214
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Registered User
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Oakland, CA
Boat: Freedom 38
Posts: 2,331
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Re: Single Women Living Aboard and Cruising... an honest look
I used to think "non-violent communication" was such a hippie-dippy term, and why do I need to understand it when I so dislike confrontation in the first place. But I now I realize I am actually creating the conflicted. I hope to change that dynamic, but man is it ever so hard. This thread depicts so well that most of us have no idea how to communicate. If you have time to watch just the first 30-40 min of this all-day workshop on non-violent communication let me know what you think of it and the ideas. It was an amazing eye-opener to me on the way I communicate and judge people. I judged the speaker on several things in the first 5 min ("oh please, I can't watch this/him," I thought) and then I didn't want to turn it off!! If I can learn about this type of communication, it should also help me to respond to crew and others who come on my boat. Maybe it will allow me to be less judgemental about the men I meet. Maybe https://youtu.be/4LuPCAh9FCc
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15-02-2018, 11:32
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#215
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Moderator

Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: UK-Mallorca
Posts: 13,278
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Re: Single Women Living Aboard and Cruising... an honest look
Quote:
Originally Posted by boatman61
Lets face it Gary.. Spain and Portugal are very mature about these things.
They don't have kids, just small grown ups. 
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I think we have the deepest respect for women here.... even when they go off in the very latin way.....
I even got my face slapped in the midst of an onslaught last week.. She stopped gasped, grabbed me and hugged and kissed me all over in apology... cried a bit too.. I wasnt even in their party, it was the table next to us..
__________________
- Never test how deep the water is with both feet -
10% of conflicts are due to different opinions. 90% by the tone of voice.
Raise your words, not your voice. It is rain that grows flowers, not thunder.
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15-02-2018, 11:33
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#216
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Moderator

Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: UK-Mallorca
Posts: 13,278
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Re: Single Women Living Aboard and Cruising... an honest look
Quote:
Originally Posted by gamayun
Maybe it will allow me to be less judgemental about the men I meet. Maybe 
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I wont hold my breath... 
__________________
- Never test how deep the water is with both feet -
10% of conflicts are due to different opinions. 90% by the tone of voice.
Raise your words, not your voice. It is rain that grows flowers, not thunder.
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15-02-2018, 11:35
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#217
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Moderator

Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: UK-Mallorca
Posts: 13,278
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Re: Single Women Living Aboard and Cruising... an honest look
Quote:
Originally Posted by gamayun
But I now I realize I am actually creating the conflicted. I hope to change that dynamic, but man is it ever so hard.
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On behalf of men everywhere, we appreciate the apology.....
__________________
- Never test how deep the water is with both feet -
10% of conflicts are due to different opinions. 90% by the tone of voice.
Raise your words, not your voice. It is rain that grows flowers, not thunder.
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15-02-2018, 11:44
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#218
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Registered User
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: Easton, MD
Boat: 15' Catboat, Bristol 35.5
Posts: 3,090
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Re: Single Women Living Aboard and Cruising... an honest look
Quote:
Originally Posted by gamayun
I used to think "non-violent communication" was such a hippie-dippy term, and why do I need to understand it when I so dislike confrontation in the first place. But I now I realize I am actually creating the conflicted. I hope to change that dynamic, but man is it ever so hard. This thread depicts so well that most of us have no idea how to communicate. If you have time to watch just the first 30-40 min of this all-day workshop on non-violent communication let me know what you think of it and the ideas. It was an amazing eye-opener to me on the way I communicate and judge people. I judged the speaker on several things in the first 5 min ("oh please, I can't watch this/him," I thought) and then I didn't want to turn it off!! If I can learn about this type of communication, it should also help me to respond to crew and others who come on my boat. Maybe it will allow me to be less judgemental about the men I meet. Maybe https://youtu.be/4LuPCAh9FCc
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It's not that we don't know how, it's just not worth the effort sometimes. I don't feel the need to appease everyone or "make everyone happy" at the expense of the truth. Men and women are different in many ways. Some people just don't want to accept that.
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15-02-2018, 11:46
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#219
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cat herder, extreme blacksheep

Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: furycame alley , tropics, mexico for now
Boat: 1976 FORMOSA yankee clipper 41
Posts: 18,890
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Re: Single Women Living Aboard and Cruising... an honest look
i didnot assign inability to read only to males. READ not edit my words. try it, you might learn something. dang. is epidemic.
for some reason you are unable to read without the internal EDIT. stop that game.
try reading the sentences as they are laid out for a change/. pretend it is the most current lee child book into which you are so absorbed you cannot miss even one word for fear of changing the story, as editing in your brain IS missing more than half the story, exactly same as is injecting your added words to the original sentences. i am so impressed by the continued usage of the psych game skills i was taught not to use and to recognise as game tools for the fairness of the individuals with whom i interact.
sorry , your games donot impress me. they are same game tools the losers of usa election process have been using upon the winner. bad policies. games and hate, manifested by and in bullying of others, specifically females. editing is prejudicial and judgemental incorrect reading of words written by others. usage of out of context items and picking apart the text is the goal bent upon destruction of the object of that hatred and bias.
i am sooo fortunate to have been able to understand these foul games folks play to improve themselves in their own eyes. itis a shame and a sin that more donot understand the workings of their own subconscious.
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15-02-2018, 11:50
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#220
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Registered User
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: Easton, MD
Boat: 15' Catboat, Bristol 35.5
Posts: 3,090
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Re: Single Women Living Aboard and Cruising... an honest look
Quote:
Originally Posted by weavis
I think we have the deepest respect for women here.... even when they go off in the very latin way.....
I even got my face slapped in the midst of an onslaught last week.. She stopped gasped, grabbed me and hugged and kissed me all over in apology... cried a bit too.. I wasnt even in their party, it was the table next to us.. 
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Gotta love a woman with a little spunk. Hope you told her she didn't need to slap you in the face for a few hugs and kisses. Downright romantic!
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15-02-2018, 11:57
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#222
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Registered User
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: Easton, MD
Boat: 15' Catboat, Bristol 35.5
Posts: 3,090
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Re: Single Women Living Aboard and Cruising... an honest look
Quote:
Originally Posted by zeehag
i didnot assign inability to read only to males. READ not edit my words. try it, you might learn something. dang. is epidemic.
for some reason you are unable to read without the internal EDIT. stop that game.
try reading the sentences as they are laid out for a change/. pretend it is the most current lee child book into which you are so absorbed you cannot miss even one word for fear of changing the story, as editing in your brain IS missing more than half the story, exactly same as is injecting your added words to the original sentences. i am so impressed by the
continued usage of the psych game skills i was taught not to use and to recognise as game tools for the fairness of the individuals with whom i interact.
sorry , your games donot impress me. they are same game tools the losers of usa election process have been using upon the winner. bad policies. games and hate, manifested by and in bullying of others, specifically females. editing is prejudicial and judgemental incorrect reading of words written by others. usage of out of context items and picking apart the text is the goal bent upon destruction of the object of that hatred and bias.
i am sooo fortunate to have been able to understand these foul games folks play to improve themselves in their own eyes. itis a shame and a sin that more donot understand the workings of their own subconscious.
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OK, I admit, I do have a little trouble reading your thoughtful comments at times. I will try harder in the future.
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15-02-2018, 12:01
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#223
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Freelance Delivery Skipper..


Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: PORTUGAL
Posts: 25,670
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Re: Single Women Living Aboard and Cruising... an honest look
Quote:
Originally Posted by kmacdonald
Gotta love a woman with a little spunk. Hope you told her she didn't need to slap you in the face for a few hugs and kisses. Downright romantic!
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Or.. a clever way to wind up who she was really mad at.. smart cookies these Latin ladies..
__________________
Born To Be Wild.. Double Click on the picture.
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15-02-2018, 12:10
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#224
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Registered User
Join Date: Sep 2017
Posts: 1,038
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Re: Single Women Living Aboard and Cruising... an honest look
The simple answer here is I got what I asked for.
"Single Women Living Aboard and Cruising... an honest look."
This "honest look" includes one obvious and extreme example of MISANDRY. Misandry is oddly not studied in psychology as much as its famous compliment, misogyny. Those who are curious could simply study this thread, perhaps.
Generalizing that single women on a boat are in such a situation BECAUSE they are misandrists would be completely unfair. However, those with open minds must consider the possibility that misandry DOES play a part in many such cases, and not just the obvious one here, no?
Such a raw, honest look shown here may just be a loud warning, when decoded correctly. Those of us men who truly support and celebrate the accomplishments of the women in their lives might have learned something valuable here. If you DO fail to encourage, cherish or skip the attempt to understand the women close to you, you may be cultivating a loner misandrist without even knowing it. Warning received. Thank you.
An honest look, indeed.
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15-02-2018, 13:07
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#225
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Moderator

Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: UK-Mallorca
Posts: 13,278
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Re: Single Women Living Aboard and Cruising... an honest look
Quote:
Originally Posted by zeehag
i didnot assign inability to read only to males. READ not edit my words. try it, you might learn something. dang. is epidemic.
for some reason you are unable to read without the internal EDIT. stop that game.
try reading the sentences as they are laid out for a change/. pretend it is the most current lee child book into which you are so absorbed you cannot miss even one word for fear of changing the story, as editing in your brain IS missing more than half the story, exactly same as is injecting your added words to the original sentences. i am so impressed by the continued usage of the psych game skills i was taught not to use and to recognise as game tools for the fairness of the individuals with whom i interact.
sorry , your games donot impress me. they are same game tools the losers of usa election process have been using upon the winner. bad policies. games and hate, manifested by and in bullying of others, specifically females. editing is prejudicial and judgemental incorrect reading of words written by others. usage of out of context items and picking apart the text is the goal bent upon destruction of the object of that hatred and bias.
i am sooo fortunate to have been able to understand these foul games folks play to improve themselves in their own eyes. itis a shame and a sin that more donot understand the workings of their own subconscious.
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Stop pointing fingers zee. Look inwards. Again you state hatred toward females by males. Its over. You wont accept and frankly at this point..
__________________
- Never test how deep the water is with both feet -
10% of conflicts are due to different opinions. 90% by the tone of voice.
Raise your words, not your voice. It is rain that grows flowers, not thunder.
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