Single Men Living Aboard and Cruising... an honest look.

[daletournier]

I don't get the impression that any of us guys here are out partying and screwing around, personally I like simple and going out and chasing women ain't simple. I'd have to but down the new Dan Brown novel!

But thanks for all "be careful protect yourself concern" my mother will happy I'm get sensible advice.

[BandB]

Originally Posted by daletournier

I don't get the impression that any of us guys here are out partying and screwing around, personally I like simple and going out and chasing women ain't simple. I'd have to but down the new Dan Brown novel!

But thanks for all "be careful protect yourself concern" my mother will happy I'm get sensible advice.

Wifey B: With all due respect, you have no idea what the guys here are doing. I would suspect it's all over the place and there are some with very irresponsible sexual activity. We're surely not a forum of perfect little angels.

[Lepke]

Pay:
I've been on both sides of the pay issue. As a worker in union and non-union businesses and as the manager or owner of several companies. Women do not negotiate as well as men. They usually don't ask for as much. When someone interviewed and I wanted them, I paid their asking price. If women got less money, it was their fault. But one of the highest paid employees I ever had was a woman. She got raises because of her value to the company. She became my production manager because she knew every skill and process and was a better organizer than I was. If I worked in the yard, it was under her schedule.
The other side is, at her career peak, she decided to get pregnant. Because she was of high value, I switched people around, hired another woman to handle her paperwork in advance of her leave. By the time the new person was trained, she was pregnant, too. So when number 2 took her leave, number 1 was back. Because my production manager was needed, we built a milking room for her, paid a nanny and so on. A month after she got back, she announced she was 3 months pregnant. All of this was extremely disruptive and costly to the business. Number 2 also came back and became pregnant again, too.
Women and mothers of childbearing age make unreliable employees. You can schedule or long term plan on women being available. Men don't run home at the first child sniffle. They don't get pregnant and are much more dedicated to their profession. For most women a profession is just a transition.

[john61ct]

But the overall "inconvenience and disruption" of birthing and rearing children is not a cost to be borne just by women.

And not even by that individualistic "family unit".

Society should put in place very cheap childcare, pre- and post- natal policies, generous maternity and paternity leave, paid family care time, even direct subsidies, encouraging people to have children.

In countries with woefully low immigration rates, their economies are now dead in the water, because as soon as a population is well developed, educated and comfortable economically, they stop making babies.

I'm not saying the burden needs to fall unfairly on small businesses either, but as a society we really need to start being more human about these issues, at least on par with the rest of the developed world.

[gamayun]

Originally Posted by Lepke

[snip] The other side is, at her career peak, she decided to get pregnant. Because she was of high value, I switched people around, hired another woman to handle her paperwork in advance of her leave. By the time the new person was trained, she was pregnant, too. So when number 2 took her leave, number 1 was back. Because my production manager was needed, we built a milking room for her, paid a nanny and so on. A month after she got back, she announced she was 3 months pregnant. All of this was extremely disruptive and costly to the business. Number 2 also came back and became pregnant again, too.
Women and mothers of childbearing age make unreliable employees. You can schedule or long term plan on women being available. Men don't run home at the first child sniffle. They don't get pregnant and are much more dedicated to their profession. For most women a profession is just a transition.

Wow, are you like an ancient person I understand these concerns, especially if your company was a small business where the effect would be felt more acutely, but this is so out of touch with many of today's more successful work environments. Many of the younger men I know who have families are taking on the same sacrifices as their wives; some even more so because the males might have the more favorable/flexible work environment. I'm glad for these changes and more progressive thinking on the issue. The 50s may have been all Ozzie-and-Harriett-like on TV, but reality for many was a lot different.

I would 100% agree with you that women don't negotiate as forcefully as men. To help address that there's a new law, which just started in the states last year and California passed this year, that does not allow companies to ask new hires what their previous pay level was. It is hoped this will prevent unreasonably low salaries being perpetuated throughout a person's career. I have my doubts though that this will be the end-all, be-all to pay discrimination, but it is a start.

FYI - usually it takes two people to 'decide to get pregnant...'

[uncle stinkybob]

It's curious to me, a thread titled "Single Men Living Aboard...an honest look" has turned into the great unequality for female war scream. It also reminds me of why, I'm "single, living aboard", and staying that way.

[gamayun]

Originally Posted by uncle stinkybob

It's curious to me, a thread titled "Single Men Living Aboard...an honest look" has turned into the great unequality for female war scream. It also reminds me of why, I'm "single, living aboard", and staying that way.

Yeah, posts on CF never veer off into alternative topics, like ever?

If you would take some time to read back through that last few pages, you'd actually find a quite interesting range of opinions that have not (yet) devolved into name calling, even when the topic was having open sexual relationships. Perhaps you'd like to contribute something intelligent (else we come to the conclusion as to exactly why you're single and living aboard ).

[gamayun]

Originally Posted by BandB

WWe're surely not a forum of perfect little angels.

Cripes. Speak for yourself

[MountainKing]

Originally Posted by Lepke

Pay:
I've been on both sides of the pay issue. As a worker in union and non-union businesses and as the manager or owner of several companies. Women do not negotiate as well as men. They usually don't ask for as much. When someone interviewed and I wanted them, I paid their asking price. If women got less money, it was their fault. But one of the highest paid employees I ever had was a woman. She got raises because of her value to the company. She became my production manager because she knew every skill and process and was a better organizer than I was. If I worked in the yard, it was under her schedule.
The other side is, at her career peak, she decided to get pregnant. Because she was of high value, I switched people around, hired another woman to handle her paperwork in advance of her leave. By the time the new person was trained, she was pregnant, too. So when number 2 took her leave, number 1 was back. Because my production manager was needed, we built a milking room for her, paid a nanny and so on. A month after she got back, she announced she was 3 months pregnant. All of this was extremely disruptive and costly to the business. Number 2 also came back and became pregnant again, too.
Women and mothers of childbearing age make unreliable employees. You can schedule or long term plan on women being available. Men don't run home at the first child sniffle. They don't get pregnant and are much more dedicated to their profession. For most women a profession is just a transition.

I would just add that for each woman that has to run home because her child got sent home sick from school, there's a man that didn't bother to because he thought his job was too important or that it was the woman's job to do so. As men become more responsible regarding their children, then less of a burden falls on the women, and parenthood is less disruptive to their career. You have to understand that when the school calls and tells you that you have to come pick up your kid, that one of the parents has to go do it. I'm not disagreeing with what you experienced, just the generalizations that you applied to most women in your final paragraph. What an interesting thread this has become.

[goat]

Originally Posted by uncle stinkybob

It's curious to me, a thread titled "Single Men Living Aboard...an honest look" has turned into the great unequality for female war scream. It also reminds me of why, I'm "single, living aboard", and staying that way.

That and the whole "stinky bob" thing.

We've gone from a self proclaimed stud unsure why his beautiful project boat wasn't attracting enough one night stands, to dogs licking their nut sacks and just about everything in between.

Personally I'm enjoying it and I'm glad to have heard some opinions from people that I didn't know I had a lot in common with ;^)

Keep it rolling ladies and gentlemen.

goat (watching from the sidelines)

[Pelagic]

Originally Posted by BandB

Wifey B: With all due respect, you have no idea what the guys here are doing. I would suspect it's all over the place and there are some with very irresponsible sexual activity. We're surely not a forum of perfect little angels.

Too true!.....
But unfortunately, you can take a horse to a trough.......but you can't make him put a condom on.[emoji6]

Seriously, it is my knowledge that I can be a risk taker together with a horrible fear of being infected, then infecting my partner, that helps me to avoid any temptation or invitations (which is very common here in the Philippines)

In the battle between raging hormones and my ethical choices, fear easily tips the scale.


Selfish mode kicks in

[uncle stinkybob]

Originally Posted by gamayun

Yeah, posts on CF never veer off into alternative topics, like ever?

If you would take some time to read back through that last few pages, you'd actually find a quite interesting range of opinions that have not (yet) devolved into name calling, even when the topic was having open sexual relationships. Perhaps you'd like to contribute something intelligent (else we come to the conclusion as to exactly why you're single and living aboard [emoji3]).

Search through 93 pages of this to find an interesting opinion? HA HA HA, if thats what you recommend, I draw more than a few conclusion's about you as well.

[Pelagic]

Originally Posted by gamayun

FYI - usually it takes two people to 'decide to get pregnant...'

I think that idea is worth exploring, not because it can be used to justify why women are treated unfairly in the marketplace, but to ask.
...."Who really decides?"

Firstly, I take the view that men and women are not "Equal"

They are different, Biologically, Psychologically and Physically.
But both sides have a right to achieve a quality of life that is equal.

Most women seem to be conditionally programmed to want to procreate.
They sexually attract and choose a male partner that meets their idea of the right fertilizing stock and the nest building qualities they seek in a partner.

What do single men want when they first meet a girl?

[BandB]

Originally Posted by Pelagic

Too true!.....
But unfortunately, you can take a horse to a trough.......but you can't make him put a condom on.[emoji6]

Seriously, it is my knowledge that I can be a risk taker together with a horrible fear of being infected, then infecting my partner, that helps me to avoid any temptation or invitations (which is very common here in the Philippines)

In the battle between raging hormones and my ethical choices, fear easily tips the scale.


Selfish mode kicks in

Wifey B: Fear is a great motivator. Now, we're going to see courts more and more, and perhaps states passing more laws, deciding that to have sex when you knowingly have an STD without telling your partner in advance can be a serious crime. It's truly assault.

[Pelagic]

Makes sense to make it a crime to knowingly infect someone.... I thought it already was