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Old 15-12-2017, 15:12   #1321
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Re: Single Men Living Aboard and Cruising... an honest look.

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Um...I was raised in bars, have received quite a bit of training in various forms of violence, have excellent aim, solo traveled all over the world, spent a lot of time in the wilderness alone, and am perfectly willing to take large risks, and I would be EXTREMELY reluctant to have you in a position of authority over me, and NEVER EVER would I go in a confined space with you for even a few minutes. You describe women in terms of their attractiveness to you, describe them as constant sexual predators, despite obvious and and overwhelming evidence that social and political power is stilll in the hands of men even in Western countries (tally up the political figures and CEOs by gender, as a mere glancing review) say that women control everything and overreact to the 'accidental' harassment they may receive, and describe yourself in the same breath as a 'Nice Guy'.

You may very well be soft spoken and reticent and seemingly gentle out from behind the computer screen.

Poor OP, comments like this get seen by female nascent sailors.
Men do not love women for their brains, neither do women
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Old 15-12-2017, 15:19   #1322
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Re: Single Men Living Aboard and Cruising... an honest look.

AHA Feminist doubletalk rubbish--should have guessed it coming from John the arch type guilt ridden white eastern seaboard Hillary backing liberal airhead
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Old 15-12-2017, 15:23   #1323
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Re: Single Men Living Aboard and Cruising... an honest look.

Most of those labels I wear with pride!

I suppose you think Social Justice Warrior is disparaging as well?

Really how could anyone?
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Old 15-12-2017, 15:27   #1324
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Re: Single Men Living Aboard and Cruising... an honest look.

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AHA Feminist doubletalk rubbish--should have guessed it coming from John the arch type guilt ridden white eastern seaboard Hillary backing liberal airhead
"Coastal Elite" to you,sir.
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Old 15-12-2017, 15:31   #1325
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Re: Single Men Living Aboard and Cruising... an honest look.

This thread has moved perilously far from cruising, and fallen into partisan politics. The theme of this forum is cruising, and politics have their own forums to use. Bring it back on topic, or it will be closed.

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Old 15-12-2017, 16:40   #1326
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Re: Single Men Living Aboard and Cruising... an honest look.

Interesting article in the London Times: https://www.thetimes.co.uk/article/w...-80s-j868mxzkv

Not news to me. Men live alone on boats because they're tired of all the unnecessary problems that come with a woman. A paid housekeeper/cook is a better, cheaper solution.
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Old 15-12-2017, 20:49   #1327
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Re: Single Men Living Aboard and Cruising... an honest look.

It discussing Gender issues within the cruising context of a sailing partner, the most important thing to remember is that it should never be a "Competition"!

We rely on each other for such a myriad of situations, that to view your partner with the default mindset of gender stereotypes, is just plain stupid

Ever since my Teen years, when faced with bitter males who seemed to take pleasure in degrading women, I would internally recite my own personal Truism.

"If you think women are inferior, then you will end up with an inferior woman, because you failed to help her develop her true potential". (And visa versa)

My partner and I, inspire each other and I feel sorry for those who never found that in their own relationships.
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Old 15-12-2017, 21:08   #1328
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Re: Single Men Living Aboard and Cruising... an honest look.

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help her develop her true potential"
And that good sir is **exactly** my° definition of True Love, especially wrt long-term "romantic" relationships between spiritually healthy humans.

Of course mutually required in both directions, and whatever the sex, preferences or gender of the partners, however many may be involved.

I realize with all this talk of utilitarian relationships, such a "high standard" may seem anachronistic.

But I do not disparage the value and convenience of the more transactional, perhaps shorter-term arrangements, as long as the terms are transparent in advance and all involved are honest consenting adults.

° inspired by my neighbor growing up and ex-therapist M Scott Peck, who may have turned out to be a right pig in the end, but did craft a nice turn of phrase in his earlier works.
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Old 15-12-2017, 21:12   #1329
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Re: Single Men Living Aboard and Cruising... an honest look.

Just as neither "side" is more truly Christian than the other, issues of universal ethics & morality can never be partisan.
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Old 15-12-2017, 21:16   #1330
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Re: Single Men Living Aboard and Cruising... an honest look.

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Just as neither "side" is more truly Christian than the other, issues of universal ethics & morality can never be partisan.
Depends which universe you come from.
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Old 15-12-2017, 21:40   #1331
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Re: Single Men Living Aboard and Cruising... an honest look.

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I realize with all this talk of utilitarian relationships, such a "high standard" may seem anachronistic.

But I do not disparage the value and convenience of the more transactional, perhaps shorter-term arrangements, as long as the terms are transparent in advance and all involved are honest consenting adults.
But this is where you limit yourself.

What may have started as transactional, can also evolve into a deep committed and loving relationship.

But then of course, the opposite direction is true also.
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Old 15-12-2017, 22:43   #1332
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Re: Single Men Living Aboard and Cruising... an honest look.

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What may have started as transactional, can also evolve into a deep committed and loving relationship.
Actually above I stated exactly that.

The one thing I never do is set or accept expectations on term lengths, min nor max.

When it's not working for everyone involved, catch and release, sooner rather than later.

Raised three crops of kiddies along the way as well, as in I was primary caregiver 90% of the years.

Their needs do make things a bit stickier, but then always practiced "it takes a village", just as true for the adults.

Doing so in actual villages does make it easier than having to find or create from scratch your own intentional communities in "the modern world".
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Old 15-12-2017, 22:45   #1333
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Re: Single Men Living Aboard and Cruising... an honest look.

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Depends which universe you come from.
Or which one you choose to create around you. I just mean not culturally specific.

Life's too short to compromise much in that regard.
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Old 16-12-2017, 08:57   #1334
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Re: Single Men Living Aboard and Cruising... an honest look.

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Or which one you choose to create around you. I just mean not culturally specific.

Life's too short to compromise much in that regard.
Nothing to do with compromise. That's a relative concept that requires judgement from a personal perspective, and so the opposite of the kind of "universal" or objectively positive environment you apparently believe "should" work for everyone. And if you can only evaluate human conflict through the very thick & superficial lens of division -- i.e. color, gender, oppressors vs. oppressed, etc. -- you necessarily become blind to commonalities that are key to mitigating such conflict.

So other than taking personal refuge in the overly simplistic & self-righteously moral high ground, what purpose is served in accentuating differences amongst people based on immutable or innate characteristics?? Doesn't this way of thinking necessarily result in perpetuating division, the exact opposite of what you're advocating for?
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Old 16-12-2017, 09:04   #1335
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Re: Single Men Living Aboard and Cruising... an honest look.

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Most of those labels I wear with pride!

I suppose you think Social Justice Warrior is disparaging as well?

Really how could anyone?
Depends on whether one is motivated by helping those in need, or motivated by wearing labels. One is selfless, the other selfish, i.e. focused on one's self rather than others. Most politicians these days seem to fall in the latter category, and there's nothing partisan about it.
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