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23-08-2016, 16:08
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#466
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Registered User
Join Date: Feb 2016
Posts: 90
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Re: Single Men Living Aboard and Cruising... an honest look.
Now Zee Hag has it sussed, I am fortunate I have been married for 54 years and have learned not to fuss to little things. I have been on a few boats inhabited by single males, first comment on going aboard," Its a bit of a mess"-----. Now if they took a critical look around and asked them selves the question, and honestly answered they would not not to come live in that mess,I have a better mess at home and its mine , so the ones willing to live in your mess, you really dont want.
I am sure ZeeHag isnt!
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23-08-2016, 16:19
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#467
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Registered User
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: Virginia
Posts: 760
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Re: Single Men Living Aboard and Cruising... an honest look.
At the top of the page is a groups menu. Within the groups there is SSSSM (single sailors seeking soul mates) go there and ask to join. Zee will vet you and allow your entry or not. Rules are easy; must be legally single, must be searching a soul mate (not a hook up).
I agree with A64. If you are social now and can find dates, surely you'd be able to along your journey.
To expand on daletournier's post, there are women that just aren't financially independent enough to cruise indefinitely at the age of 53, or +/- 10 years on either side of that age. They may want to continue to work to build up their retirement funds. Such is my case. Economics plays an important role in cutting those dock lines. So my advice would be to seek out financially independent women that are also adventurous enough to say yes to the lifestyle. It surely narrows the field even more. Probably why there are more "hook ups" rather than more lasting relationships between male and female sailors. However many seem to overcome this through some kind of compromise. So don't give up all hope.
Many, like me, and you, are just pursuing a dream. I'm more concentrated on the sailing part of the dream, rather than the companionship. If it happens out there? Great! If not, still great! I'll be cruising!
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23-08-2016, 16:30
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#468
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Moderator Emeritus

Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: Key West & Sarasota
Boat: Cal 28 "Happy Days"
Posts: 4,210
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Re: Single Men Living Aboard and Cruising... an honest look.
I was a single male (firefighter) living on a boat, in a marina with a tiki bar, and had a parrot that said all the right things.... NEVER had an issue attracting the opposite sex for a visit to the boat!
__________________
Any fool with a big enough checkbook can BUY a boat; it takes a SPECIAL type of fool to build his own! -Capngeo
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23-08-2016, 16:33
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#469
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Registered User
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: Virginia
Posts: 760
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Re: Single Men Living Aboard and Cruising... an honest look.
Quote:
Originally Posted by zeehag
expectations yield disappointment and short duration relationships, as no one can live up to your expectations. .
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as she says, expectations do often times yield disappointment. It's not really either or, but it can certainly seem that way. It all will probably depend on both your ability's to be flexible and both of your ability's to compromise. Unfortunately by my observations, that's rare. So I just plan to make my own plans at this stage in life.
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23-08-2016, 16:39
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#470
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Registered User
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: Virginia
Posts: 760
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Re: Single Men Living Aboard and Cruising... an honest look.
Quote:
Originally Posted by capngeo
I was a single male (firefighter) living on a boat, in a marina with a tiki bar, and had a parrot that said all the right things.... NEVER had an issue attracting the opposite sex for a visit to the boat!
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Correct me if I'm wrong, but he wasn't asking about a"visit", he was asking about like minded women that he could form a relationship with. Most humans are able to find sex, even if it involves a financial outlay.
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23-08-2016, 16:43
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#471
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Registered User
Join Date: Oct 2014
Location: Nashville
Boat: None
Posts: 258
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Re: Single Men Living Aboard and Cruising... an honest look.
Quote:
Originally Posted by zeehag
ye cannot be happy with another when you are unhappy with self.
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Fantastic piece of wisdom that many people need to read and learn from.
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23-08-2016, 16:49
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#472
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Senior Cruiser

Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: Port Moresby,Papua New Guinea
Boat: FP Belize Maestro 43 and OPB
Posts: 11,134
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Re: Single Men Living Aboard and Cruising... an honest look.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Aimlessness
Hi, No BS please. I am leaving to go south in two months alone on a 42' cruiser. I am satisfied to be alone but I do get on occasion lonely. I think I'd like to find someone with the same aspirations to cruise fulltime but as of yet have met no one. I am 53, not unattractive, and the boat is in good shape. What expectation should I have to meet a woman?
Thanks
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A lot depends on where you are "going south" from (and to). If it's from Tasmania, then I wouldn't have high expectations.
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23-08-2016, 16:51
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#473
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Moderator Emeritus

Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: Key West & Sarasota
Boat: Cal 28 "Happy Days"
Posts: 4,210
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Re: Single Men Living Aboard and Cruising... an honest look.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gadagirl
Correct me if I'm wrong, but he wasn't asking about a"visit", he was asking about like minded women that he could form a relationship with. Most humans are able to find sex, even if it involves a financial outlay.
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PTTF, I married one of them!
__________________
Any fool with a big enough checkbook can BUY a boat; it takes a SPECIAL type of fool to build his own! -Capngeo
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23-08-2016, 17:27
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#474
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Registered User
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: Virginia
Posts: 760
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Re: Single Men Living Aboard and Cruising... an honest look.
Quote:
Originally Posted by capngeo
PTTF, I married one of them!
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Fantastic!!!! Now that is encouraging and positive!!!!
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23-08-2016, 17:54
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#475
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Registered User
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Hurricane Highway
Boat: Cal 29
Posts: 3,906
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Re: Single Men Living Aboard and Cruising... an honest look.
Contrary to fiction, there really isn't that one true love out there for everyone. But if you want to sail and hope to meet your dream sailing gal, get out of the cubicle or off the bar stool or whatever, and live your dream. Life is random; a crapshoot. Luck favors the bold according to somebody.
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23-08-2016, 18:27
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#476
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Registered User
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: between the devil and the deep blue sea
Boat: a sailing boat
Posts: 20,485
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Re: Single Men Living Aboard and Cruising... an honest look.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gadagirl
Fantastic!!!! Now that is encouraging and positive!!!!
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That poster said 'one of them'. As if there were more than one of them. ;-)
This is actually the worst possible prognostics for all the remaining single men living aboard and cruising. I mean, posting.
Unless that's exactly what they want to do.
Which does not seem to be the case.
Judging from the number of posts in this thread ;-) ;-) ;-)
Cheers,
b.
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25-08-2016, 07:36
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#477
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Registered User
Join Date: Aug 2016
Location: Currently Virginia, but moving South to FLA and beyond after Hurricane season
Boat: Bristol 40
Posts: 14
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Re: Single Men Living Aboard and Cruising... an honest look.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gadagirl
Correct me if I'm wrong, but he wasn't asking about a"visit", he was asking about like minded women that he could form a relationship with. Most humans are able to find sex, even if it involves a financial outlay.
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Exactly! Sex IS the easy part, but the friendship of a relationship, I expect, will be difficult to find in my age group for the reasons Gadagirl stated.
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25-08-2016, 08:45
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#478
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Registered User
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Hurricane Highway
Boat: Cal 29
Posts: 3,906
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Re: Single Men Living Aboard and Cruising... an honest look.
I'm so old now my doc is prescribing sex and Medicare pays 80%. Trying to get the VA to cover the balance but so far, no joy.
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27-08-2016, 21:43
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#479
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Registered User
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Mexico
Boat: Sold Catalina 250
Posts: 203
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Re: Single Men Living Aboard and Cruising... an honest look.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Aimlessness
Hi, No BS please. I am leaving to go south in two months alone on a 42' cruiser. I am satisfied to be alone but I do get on occasion lonely. I think I'd like to find someone with the same aspirations to cruise fulltime but as of yet have met no one. I am 53, not unattractive, and the boat is in good shape. What expectation should I have to meet a woman?
Thanks
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I find this age group to be a difficult one. I am 53 and find that most people my age are still on the wheel working.
More details should be posted.
How long cruising and where.
Im sure there are many that would love to go cruising but how many can afford to leave.
Sent from my iPhone using Cruisers Sailing Forum
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29-08-2016, 07:27
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#480
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Registered User
Join Date: Aug 2016
Location: Currently Virginia, but moving South to FLA and beyond after Hurricane season
Boat: Bristol 40
Posts: 14
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Re: Single Men Living Aboard and Cruising... an honest look.
[QUOTE=lorrie;2199073]I find this age group to be a difficult one. I am 53 and find that most people my age are still on the wheel working.
More details should be posted.
How long cruising and where.
Im sure there are many that would love to go cruising but how many can afford to leave.
Again, I agree that there are few who are able to get off the treadmill.
I bought the Morgan specifically because it is, IMO, a very comfortable boat for a couple with the thought of having a cruising partner. My current plan is to spend a year or two throughout the Caribbean then if things are going well to cross to the Pacific. As the Zen Master said, "We'll see."
The thing is although I have a budget it is not very tight meaning that if I met someone even with limited resources who wanted to walk away from it all it would work for us. After dating a few women I've found that it isn't really about resources as much as it about their fear of leaving it all behind and their lack of desire to live a minimal lifestyle.
Ron
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