Rules & Etiquette for Visitors Aboard Your Boat

[Cacique]

Originally Posted by Bash

Another good reason not to charter your boat. While chartering up in the San Juan Islands I once re-wired a windlass with just my leatherman tool.

Exactly what I mean .

[Cacique]

Originally Posted by Rakuflames

My personal pet peeve -- "repurposing" lines. I saw a guy trying to remove a line from a fender -- because he wanted to use the line for something else. I have lots of extra line on the boat, and if I have a line somewhere -- it's there for a reason. You may not know what the reason is. That doesn't mean you should use it for something else!

Everything on my boat is where it is for a reason. you may not agree -- but it isn't your boat.

Yes on my level again
Exactly what I mean .

[Bash]

Originally Posted by Cacique

Exactly what I mean .

I was under duress. I either had to weigh the anchor by hand, or rewire the windlass with my leatherman.

Seemed a clear choice at the time. In my defense, I didn't charge the charter company for my labor.

Of course, this is why I'd never invest in a charter boat.

[Rakuflames]

Originally Posted by Stu Jackson

Interesting and valuable observation.

With now 14 years of experience with our boat, and with a reasonable amount of thought on a case-by-case basis, everything has been figured out to be where it needs to be, each of them for a distinct purpose. I singlehand lots of the time, and when introducing new folks, explain why things are where they are: it's usually a result of a LOT of work and planning: which is figuring out how to do LESS work in the long run! When you're alone, it's important to minimize the back-and-forth tasks that folks with normal crews sometimes take for granted.

Exactly -- I single-hand a lot too, but even if I didn't --

It's my freakin' boat, not yours! Go put the lines where YOU want on YOUR boat! Don't have one? That doesn't make this one yours for the day!

[Greenhand]

Originally Posted by Rakuflames

Exactly -- I single-hand a lot too, but even if I didn't --

It's my freakin' boat, not yours! Go put the lines where YOU want on YOUR boat! Don't have one? That doesn't make this one yours for the day!

Even as co-captains, we have agreed on where things go. We don't always have the same priorities, but figure out what we can agree on. If you mess with that, you are going to have to witness the process and it ain't always pretty.

[Cacique]

Originally Posted by Bash

I didn't charge the charter company for my labor.

LOL I should hope not!
Are you a certified electrician? If not you could be excused for using the Letherman.

[Ex-Calif]

Originally Posted by Cacique

LOL I should hope not!
Are you a certified electrician? If not you could be excused for using the Letherman.

Bash has a little McGiver in him.

Last charter we rewired the cockpit arch speakers (dead) and a cockpit arch light with a swiss Army knife.

Who's to say it's the wrong tool?

I expect my repairs will last the life of the boat.

[SaucySailoress]

Originally Posted by SVNeko

Its not about the damage to the boat (although its a PITA to string a tramp), but rather the risk to the kid. Even at anchor if one falls through you can't guarantee a safe reboarding.

Yup. And their tiny feet could get stuck in those holes, since most are made from woven strapping. But wouldn't it be cool to get a PROPER bouncy trampoline for the boat?

[I.Grind]

Yes a bouncy tramp would be cool, especially if you wanted to bounce into the water (at anchor of course). Thanks everyone for explaining.

[Dale Hedtke]

Bash, you make me want to go back to school... Great way to treat your TAs.

Curious to hear more about Wonderblond ;>) Great term.

All: I've enjoyed the suggestions for rules for having guests and being a guest. I go both ways on cost sharing. When my daughters (boyfriends in tow often) or brother come, I usually cover all food costs. Usually there is some cost sharing for liquor with my brother. Guests always offer to pay for or provide provisions, often pay for meals ashore, etc. I expect that, but never insist on it (never had to.) I never expect guests to pay fuel or docking costs figuring if we were going there already, they are our expenses.

[jtsailjt]

Originally Posted by David_Old_Jersey

Some Skippers rely on crew / passengers / guests having the gift of second sight.

The irony being that if the Skipper had the gift of foresight that many problems / confusions / dissapointments could have easily been avoided.

I've never had a written list for guests but after thinking about it as I read through this thread, think I'm going to make one up. Some of my favorite people aren't sailors so how can I expect them to know about such common boat things as water conservation while showering and reserving one hand for themselves and how to use the head (vacuflush, so pretty simple), if you open a hatch/portlight you close the hatch/portlight before we get underway and lots of other little things most of us would take for granted that "everyone" already knows. Lots of really nice, courteous, people just don't know these things, and it seems that quite a few of them also have only limited mind reading abilities, especially a mind like mine!

I never invite people on my boat unless they are people whose company I enjoy a lot so I would never consider asking them for a financial contribution. If they ask what they can bring, depending on the length of the planned stay aboard, I might say "just yourselves" or "a frozen casserole would be helpful" or "whatever you like to drink." But all the good friends I invite aboard seem to manage to find an appropriate way to contribute, whether that be by picking up the dinner tab at a restaurant, or by inviting us to their vacation home at a later date, or by insisting on being there to help out on the day I apply bottom paint or winterize all the systems. It just never seems to be a problem but if I ever felt like I was being used, I don't have to invite them to come back.

One area that I insist on is that if I politely ask them to do something or to stop doing something, it's really not an "ask" or suggestion, it's basically an order. Overall, I try to be as laissez faire as possible and I don't ask anyone to do anything unless I have a very good reason for doing it. For example, if you're not into trimming sails that's perfectly fine, but when I ask you to not sit right beside the main winches while we're tacking so I can't reach it, I mean it! Our instruments are just above the companionway so when I ask you to not stand on the companionway steps, blocking my view of the wind/speed/depth instruments, that's not really a suggestion either. The first time it happens I patiently explain the "why" I don't want anyone standing there, but subsequent times I get progressively less patient and more pointed. If it becomes apparent that someone thinks my "requests" are optional for them, I don't make a big deal out of it, I just don't invite them back aboard.

[tuffr2]

I have friends that know boats and friends that do not know boats.

Friends with boats show up in swim trunks/ tee shirt, take their sandals off, step on the boat with sure feet, help shoving off and docking, anticipate getting into the water, buy my lunch etc. (People like me)

Friends w/o boats show up in jeans wearing socks and shoes. I tell them to take off their shoes, now they have socks on ...ugh. They hand me their bag-o-stuff while they slowly and unsure of their footing step onto the boat. They just sit there while I shove off, they do not get into the water...usually they do not get invited back as they are just not as much fun to have on the boat. (People unlike me)

Can you guys imagine not having boat shoes, swim wear, mask, snorkel, fins???? I can't.

[Dockhead]

Originally Posted by tuffr2

Can you guys imagine not having boat shoes, swim wear, mask, snorkel, fins???? I can't.

Umm, well, yes. Where I sail, it's more like sea boots, salopettes, foul weather jacket, and a neoprene ski mask. But I guess I kind of understand what you're getting at.

[letsgetsailing3]

Originally Posted by tuffr2

Can you guys imagine not having boat shoes, swim wear, mask, snorkel, fins???? I can't.

You have to teach them. I would expect them to bring their own suit, but having an extra couple of masks or snorkels on the boat makes a lot of sense, if only to expand YOUR options.

[BandB]

We actually have a scripted orientation for each or our boats. We refer to the script which is a laminated page to make sure we cover things. And the first thing we do is walk each guest through the boat. We show them where the galley is and invite them to make themselves at home. We show them the heads and discuss the toilets and showers. We also do things like show them where we have tons of sun screen stored and we caution them on the sun and how sneaky it can be out on the water. We advise them that if conditions warrant there are areas of the boat they will be told to stay away from while underway. We discuss sea sickness and precautions as well as what to do if they get sick. We do ask them to take any dishes they use to the kitchen sink as our friends do in our home. We do this even when we have a full crew. We do advise on basic safety precautions and tell them where the life jackets are if needed or if the captain requires them at some point.

One of the biggest things we are careful to advise is "don't try to help." This is especially true in docking. Newcomers underestimate the Captain's ability and will also do things that result in injury to themselves. We are fully prepared to handle everything. Now some who go with us regularly have been trained and know what to do at the docks.

Our orientation I believe make people more comfortable on the boat. They then aren't scared of the galley or the head. They know where some things they might need are stored. And they know they aren't expected to jump in and handle lines and things like that. If it's a boat with a crew we also tell them who the crew members are and what their roles are.

Some of our friends actually do the orientation for new guests now as they've learned our ways. We've found that taking the time to do this avoids many safety risks but also makes the guests more comfortable. Sometimes it's simple things. For instance, people don't know whether the towels you have hanging are to be used or just decorative (all ours are to be used) or where to get a towel if they want one on deck.

One other thing even if the guests are regular boaters, we are very informal. It's another home for us not a luxury five star hotel. We make sure our guests understand. But then most of our boat guests have been in our home and know how we do things.