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Old 23-02-2019, 05:37   #31
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Re: Looking for some advise, possible big life change

I suppose my wife and I have reached the age where people seem to be dying all around us at a faster rate... family, friends, coworkers. Yes it is really humbling and makes you think about what's important in life and how little time we could have left to go out and enjoy things. These are the things that many of you have just commented above.

However this whole philosophy of "just chuck it and go sailing" needs to be balanced against reality and practicality. I've got some HS age kids that still need to be raised. Can't just start cruising the world tomorrow. Others may have other commitments that tie them down. But it is really nice to hear of your who have taken the leap. God speed.
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Old 25-02-2019, 09:44   #32
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Re: Looking for some advise, possible big life change

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Originally Posted by makobuilders View Post
However this whole philosophy of "just chuck it and go sailing" needs to be balanced against reality and practicality. I've got some HS age kids that still need to be raised. Can't just start cruising the world tomorrow. Others may have other commitments that tie them down. But it is really nice to hear of your who have taken the leap. God speed.
I completely agree. I grew up with grasshopper parents who were convinced the world was going to end tomorrow.

They never saved, they never made plans that required concrete planning, they burned through every dollar they made the minute they made it, they indulged every stupid whim the minute that occurred to them, and made many choices that put them into debt and had people knocking on our doors looking to repossess that giant screen TV from Sears. It created a constant sense of uncertainty and doom on your doorstep lifestyle for my brother and myself.

They're now in their mid 70's, and living a very small and sad life in Alabama somewhere, because that's all they can afford.

My brother followed in their footsteps, made many babies with women, hides on a boat somewhere and doesn't work so the child support people can't find him (shame on you), and is convinced his life choices are someone else's fault and his dreams should have come true.

I, on the other hand, am an ant. I married an ant, and at 49, if I die tomorrow, I will have happily lived a full life of good choices and carefully thought out goals. I am living my best life, and it doesn't hurt other people or myself.

That's the big lie of Carpe Diem-that it requires you to eschew choices that you'd make assuming a long life.

The best choices and true happiness encompass both.
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Old 18-03-2019, 01:44   #33
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Re: Looking for some advise, possible big life change

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Originally Posted by makobuilders View Post
However this whole philosophy of "just chuck it and go sailing" needs to be balanced against reality and practicality. I've got some HS age kids that still need to be raised. Can't just start cruising the world tomorrow. Others may have other commitments that tie them down. But it is really nice to hear of your who have taken the leap. God speed.
Fair enough... but my original comment that could be paraphrased as "just chuck it and go sailing" was based on reading between the lines that the OP doesn't have real/practical reasons holding them back (or they probably wouldn't be asking this question and looking for advice).

I talk to people every single day who have "reasons" why they can't go.
Most of those in reality boil down to excuses based upon fears.
I know a few months ago we took a look at our "reasons" and realized they were really nothing more than excuses, and after a few minutes of letting that sink in we started looking at boats and made an offer 3 days later.

Don't get me wrong... HS age kids can be a good reason to stay, but it doesn't mean its impossible to go if indeed your dream is to be out there sailing/cruising.

It's not like there aren't HS age kids on boats. Education can happen from afar (if they are interested and won't feel completely ripped away from their life/friends), so this like most other reasons can also become an excuse... its a slippery slope.

Have you asked them if they might be interested in being "raised" on a boat in the Caribbean??
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Old 18-03-2019, 03:18   #34
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Re: Looking for some advise, possible big life change

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Have you asked them if they might be interested in being "raised" on a boat in the Caribbean??
I actually asked them that exact question! We have an "adventure family" for sure, but I guess the lure of the Carib wasn't enough to overpower a couple of teens in their last few years at HS.

BTW, how did you come up with the name theDangerz? I'm not sure I want to go boating with you
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Old 18-03-2019, 09:22   #35
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Re: Looking for some advise, possible big life change

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I actually asked them that exact question! We have an "adventure family" for sure, but I guess the lure of the Carib wasn't enough to overpower a couple of teens in their last few years at HS.

BTW, how did you come up with the name theDangerz? I'm not sure I want to go boating with you
We didn’t actually come up with it. Our friends did years ago. I think mostly just because we didn’t fit in and just couldn’t force ourselves to stay on the “normal” path like everyone else. I guess to others that seemed risky or dangerous. I look back and know with 100% certainly that if I kept my job I would have already had a massiv heart attack or be dead - that seems way more dangerous to me.

Always thought it was funny as were anything but dangerous... but somehow it stuck and people don’t know us by our given names. Did give us momentary pause a few months ago when we decide to sail, but figured if we should be worried about anything it’s probably our complete lack of experience rather than a name.
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Old 18-07-2019, 09:40   #36
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Re: Looking for some advise, possible big life change

I owned and ran a business for 20 years that foundered in the 2008 recession, as did my wife’s business. It kicked our butts. It took us 10 years to recover from that.

About 2 years ago I was sitting in my cramped cubicle at the large corporation I now work for, performing useful and essential yet mind-numbing tasks. I had hit some kind of threshold, I thought “this needs to change soon or my life will end prematurely”. I was 56 at the time, I pondered that if I stopped working this way sooner, I would make less, yet live longer. This sounded fine. I conceived a plan and told my wife. She was on board and began working the plan. It has matured since then and we have been working steadily on setting it up.

Broadly the plan was as follows: Jettison most of our stuff, store the remainder. Set up 1 or more vacation rentals for semi-steady income, sell some toys. use a small 401 k as a backstop, move to another country for a time (likely Mexico) to reduce potential medical and living costs. Lower the stress, live near the sea. Sail. Possible sailing adventures – live aboard? – Perhaps.

So far, we’ve fixed up and sold a cabin my wife inherited and bought a house in Sedona, AZ and fixed it up as a vacation rental. It is going very well and will likely generate steady income for years to come. Early this year we set a firm target for when to move. 2 years. These next two years are the most stressful years because we are jettisoning stuff and need to fix up our existing home for sale.

I am finding this curiously freeing and I am finding goodness in parting with stuff. I am a designer/fabricator/maker and a high-functioning packrat. This means that I CAN tell you what I have and WHERE it is amongst my highly organized bins. Yet, it mostly needs to go.

Whoa…this is hard, am I committed or not? I built up and stocked an entire nice toolbox for my brother and gave it to him. We’ve been giving stuff away. Some ebay-ing, but it is terribly slow. I am guessing I need to schedule a front end loader for two years in the future – to trash our remaining stuff.

Another fun part is that we own a Macgregor 26x (no jeers please, it has been a load of fun). Yes we’ll get a more serious boat eventually, but I can trailer the danged thing to Mexico at about 60 kts and do light coastal stuff. I need to make it more Seaworthy and that is already entertaining us.

I’ll update this as we progress if anyone is curious.
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