Create A Liveaboard Helpline

[captain58sailin]

I thought the help line was the nearest local alcohol dispensary, where we all get together and bend an elbow and complain about our problems and listen to the neighbors problems and commiserate, then no more problems, or the guy next to you problems are so much worse you fell better by the comparison to yours.

[Goosebumps]

I quote Mahatma Gandhi: Live as if you were to die tomorrow; learn as if you were to live forever.
The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.
Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony.
An eye for eye only ends up making the whole world blind.
First they ignore you, then they laugh at you, then they fight you, then you win.
You must be the change you wish to see in the world.

[weavis]

Dear LiveaboardAbby

I joined the network! 3 weeks ago I let my 7 kids be babysat by a lovely couple when docked in Gibraltar. When me and the missus came back from a night out, their boat had gone and it appears so had my kids.

The yard manager told me a large Dhow came in the marina during the afternoon and 2 Camels were taken on board the couples yacht. Both vessels then headed off to North Africa.

My question is: Should I offer to pay the Diesel for the day trip the kids have gone on? I dont want to be seen as taking advantage.....

[Goosebumps]

Originally Posted by weavis

Dear LiveaboardAbby



I joined the network! 3 weeks ago I let my 7 kids be babysat by a lovely couple when docked in Gibraltar. When me and the missus came back from a night out, their boat had gone and it appears so had my kids.



The yard manager told me a large Dhow came in the marina during the afternoon and 2 Camels were taken on board the couples yacht. Both vessels then headed off to North Africa.



My question is: Should I offer to pay the Diesel for the day trip the kids have gone on? I dont want to be seen as taking advantage.....

We can be proud of what CF members postings have come to. Never underestimate limited thinking.

[weavis]

Originally Posted by Goosebumps

We can be proud of what CF members postings have come to. Never underestimate limited thinking.

Really?

Let me tell you about ideas Mr Goosebump. The person who proposes one has to take the rough with the smooth in response to the concept. Now, in my personal opinion, based on logistics, distance, communications, language etc, Im not seeing an easy implementation of your idea unless there are centres all over the world.

I also see it as a project that will be underused. Marinas, bars, restaurants, docks, other boaters all fulfil the role of 'helpline' to liveaboards, I also would point out that anyone on a boat requiring a helpline actually probably requires the services of a professional medical team.

My professional opinion as a medical practitioner who is involved in crisis centre helplines along with my colleagues AND also mans a phone for 8 hours a month, is that you have not done your homework.

The local helpline here in this town, even with free staffing on the lines, still costs thousands a year to operate. There is liason with police, medical facilities and social services which requires 2 full time staff and salaries for them. We get free or reduced phone lines for local use. Satelite communications might prove an issue for your proposal.

I am fairly confident that the majority of boaters, will make themselves available to others if there is an issue. For those suffering depression and other problems, then they will need to use the medical facilities onshore. Thats where the help is.

I did not dismiss your idea outright. I dismissed it after thinking about it and being about £2 million short and not really necessary for the boating community.

[Goosebumps]

Originally Posted by weavis

Really?



Let me tell you about ideas Mr Goosebump. The person who proposes one has to take the rough with the smooth in response to the concept. Now, in my personal opinion, based on logistics, distance, communications, language etc, Im not seeing an easy implementation of your idea unless there are centres all over the world.



I also see it as a project that will be underused. Marinas, bars, restaurants, docks, other boaters all fulfil the role of 'helpline' to liveaboards, I also would point out that anyone on a boat requiring a helpline actually probably requires the services of a professional medical team.



My professional opinion as a medical practitioner who is involved in crisis centre helplines along with my colleagues AND also mans a phone for 8 hours a month, is that you have not done your homework.



The local helpline here in this town, even with free staffing on the lines, still costs thousands a year to operate. There is liason with police, medical facilities and social services which requires 2 full time staff and salaries for them. We get free or reduced phone lines for local use. Satelite communications might prove an issue for your proposal.



I am fairly confident that the majority of boaters, will make themselves available to others if there is an issue. For those suffering depression and other problems, then they will need to use the medical facilities onshore. Thats where the help is.



I did not dismiss your idea outright. I dismissed it after thinking about it and being about £2 million short and not really necessary for the boating community.

Thanks for your quality response. You make very important point about the funds not denying anymore the need. I see it as less formal set up, maybe I am naive, but some volunteers being willing to listen could offer to listen. As a medical practitioner and help line phone handler you know that listening often is enough, as the help seeker forced to formulate the previous unformulatable already finds recourse in that starting him/her on the road of self-therapy!

[Goosebumps]

-Bernard Moitessier "We cannot direct the wind, but we can adjust the sails."

[Lizzy Belle]

Have you considered calling it the " Liveaboard Quotes Line" instead of Helpline?

[Sea Dreaming]

I'm too new here it care if my coments are laughed at or dismissed. Gah! The net is simultaneously the most wonderful thing and brings out the worst in people!

Goosebums, your idea isn't a bad one and I think the first crusing year is fought with all kinds of ups and downs, emotional and mechanical etc. Obviously those posting to this thread are bit further along and know whom and what they can rely on. Too bad they have forgotten their first venture into live aboard life.

As to an actual help line, as already ppinter out, it's fraught with financial and other difficulties. But a volunteer net work of folk friendly to newbies would be a wonderful resource for those just starting out. My impression is that most cruisers are pretty friendly and willing to help out This forum might serve that need but it also come with a lot of negativity to wade through. The schmoo can be pretty deep.

[Lizzy Belle]

Originally Posted by Sea Dreaming

Goosebums, your idea isn't a bad one
>|<
Obviously those posting to this thread are bit further along and know whom and what they can rely on. Too bad they have forgotten their first venture into live aboard life.

Great assumption, too bad it's wrong. I understand the need to invalidate responses that aren't positive, but how about dealing with the issues that have been raised?

His idea isn't as much bad as it is unrealistic and dangerous.

There's no funding of any kind, so the volunteers will be just that: people who mean well, but have no training. Goosebumps claims he's trained, but the way he's handling this thread makes me wonder what training he is referring to.

What if someone calls in from across the globe, who's completely lost in all the liveaboard rules and is desperate for help? "Sorry, Sir, I haven't a clue about rules and regulations in your country". That'll make them feel better in no time ...

So, well meaning but completely untrained volunteers answer a suicide call from another country. How are they going to actually HELP and not harm? How will they know what help is available in another country? How will they know how to handle such a call?

Who's going to be there to look after the volunteers? These calls can be very hard and difficult. So the volunteers need someone they can turn to, too, for guidance etc. Are they all going to depend on the OP?

There's a reason we have health care professionals. If you don't know what you're doing, you're very likely to make matters worse, not better. Dangerous stuff when dealing with people who have the kind of problems the OP wants to tackle.

[FSMike]

I think that the number of cruisers willing to help somebody is much larger than the number of cruisers willing to join an organization.

[Sea Dreaming]

Lizzy Bell, you say suicide help line, but no where does goosebumps say the same. He says streesed, feeling down. Friends can help here butwho ya gonna call if your friends don't get it? It won't be you because they might be afraid you would jump to conclusions.

[Lizzy Belle]

Originally Posted by Sea Dreaming

Lizzy Bell, you say suicide help line, but no where does goosebumps say the same.

He does:

Originally Posted by Goosebumps

Why not suicide prevention? Are you trying to clain liveaboards cannot harbor suicidal feelings?

As to

Originally Posted by Sea Dreaming

who ya gonna call if your friends don't get it? It won't be you because they might be afraid you would jump to conclusions.

Better not be me; I am not qualified to help strangers with their emotional / mental problems, nor do I want to. I'll stick to people I know, living in a country I know. That way, I can actually help (them get help).

Good intentions aren't always enough. I've seen first hand how much harm can be done and I will never risk doing the same.

[Goosebumps]

Its early morning here I just got up and am going over the posts in this thread. I am happy some of you are giving this thread serioys thought. zthat is actually all we can expect. I have been fortunate in my view having trained as counsellor, working in European dry out clinic as coubsellor, than having worked with escaped child soldiers of the eigthies on Mozambican border. These experiences armed me to dace the world differently, relativate things more maybe better. Mental problems are part of all of us. My most recent encounter with a liveaboard who needed a shoulder to cry on was a single hander cruiser liveaboard of French origin who lost a daugther and learnt of it late missing out on closure. It it led me to start this thread here. I think rather than going on about the OP and the relevance or non relevance of the thread it would be better if those mentally so obvioysly healthy members would really apply their mind to the issue at hand for a few moments like lizzy bell does so elegantly. To me it would be great to learn if other liveaboards, not only those in marinas, have encountered liveaboards that needed that bitnof support to lift their spirits.

[Pelagic]

I do believe we need a helpline for dyslexic sailors......
They can innocently get into all kinds grief and loose their way.
For years I have been trying to liveabroad.....but they keep kicking me out of their country....

Goosebumps.... Laughter is the best medicine.