For me personally if I was in your situation I would be looking at a bit older cruising boats
that are already out there and that someone else has put a lot of money and work into!
That's exactly what I'd be doing, probably in the Sea or Cortez, etc. All will be
work but this would give you the best value.
If you'll be
singlehanding a lot, which I do a lot as well, keep it in the around 35ft range at most, which will also make it easier to meet your upfront and ongoing
budget. Something like an
Island Packet 38 you'd practically be lonely in you'd have so much room. That having been said, you never know where life may lead so something ideal for a couple isn't a bad thing.
Do you know what kind of
boat you'd like? Get out in as many as you can, as crew if possible. Lots of people would probably happily take you on if you contribute for expenses. It sounds more like a modern production cruiser, but make sure you'd be comfortable crossing an ocean to the Caribbean/Polynesia because if you do it long enough you'll probably want to.
Best wishes and make some great memories in the life ahead!