Do You Know of Anyone Who Quit Right Away ?

[mintyspilot]

Originally Posted by MarkJ

I don't see why this post of mine is so criticised?

You are all quite on your own to do what you f@#%* like.

Presumably you made this post because there are people out there who do NOT do what you suggested.

I think you've uncovered some of those people on here.

Personally, I agree with your list. All of it.

[SaltyMonkey]

I have no qualms about MarkJs points...and they are all strong.

except perhaps the 90+ % BS part...

Do I know I am AOK and will make it when i cross the boundary from say 20% BS to 90% BS

[fishwife]

Right on the mark Mark Seriously, I see no reason to be critical of your list.

P.

[VirtualVagabond]

Ok Mark... you've been onto that red juice again, haven't you....

[Livia]

This is a fascinating thread for me.

Excellent question Serah and excellent response MarkJ.

This thread in part explains the glazed look in people's eyes when I would smile a huge (surely naive looking) smile and say "we're going cruising!" and why they immediately asked "when?" and then when I said "June 2010" they perked up a bit and were at least ready to talk.

It also explains why people raised their eyebrows when we talked about being at a dock for part of our first winter of cruising

...only time will tell for all of us, right? As long as it is fun.

[sailorboy1]

Originally Posted by MarkJ

• Know how to sail and if you will enjoy it before buying the boat.
• Don't buy a boat thats falling apart - it will only continue to do so no matter what you do (unless you are a shipwright/mechanic)
• Sail intensively on that boat before heading out
• Go 'normal': Have a chartplotter, engine, toilets, galley, refrig etc - who wants to **** in a bucket then wash dishes in it?! True story!
• Have enough money
• Have money to have 'breaks' whether that be a trip home to see friends, or a good hot shower occasionally, marina for a night sometimes, or hotel room (with spa bath!) occasionally.
• don't waste your money!
• Don't listen to HF radio scheds - they promote fear
• Go your own way, not Jimmy Cornells waypoints
• Don't listen to cruisers advice 80% is ******** (my advice is 90% bs)
• Give women the boat they want.
• Give women girl time with other women.
• Give women money for girl crap like cosmetics, bling etc
• Give women credit for their responsibility, their sailing, watch keeping
• Never shorten sail because the wife is coming on watch! Thats insulting!
• Always shorten sail early so sailing isnt terrifying
• Let women drive the dink 50% of the time.
• Treat women as an equal sailor not a head cleaner, but expect them to work as a sailor too.
• Give women navigational responsabilites and don't complain when the boat is a bit off course.
• Have money to buy a present for the other half, including birthdays and Christmas.
• A cruising boat doesn't have to be 100% perfect - forget the worklist and live life.
• Keep the romance alive by being romantic
• Have pride in appearance: not a grease covered, shaggy headed, rag wearing, smelly cruiser like many.
• Make the boat a home.

Remember cruising is not the 'be all, end all' passion of the world! When you're done with it other adventures just as exciting will come up

Thats just off the top of my head.....

All valid and if changed a little could be applied to any lifestlye for happiness.

[aquarian]

Mark I thought it was good advice . . . . . .but then again, I'm a girl.

[gettinthere]

Mark

Loved your list except for one item...

Let women drive the dink 50% of the time.

She can drive the dink when she pries the throttle from my cold, dead hands! And she probably will!

[barnakiel]

Originally Posted by SaltyMonkey

I don't think we should polarize or say this and thus is the end of the road. It becomes pretentious the posturing, the self importance of any of it.

(...)

Whats important is the journey, even if you never get to the point of getting a boat you will learn something. Change your mind a million zillion times, say naive things...it doesn't matter.

Now I like the above drift. I too think there is virtue in perseverance AND then again there is virtue in giving up too (much as we might have been taught otherwise at school).

We jump to call people quitters but how do we know how much wisdom or gut it takes to quit?

When I see my student mumbling 'I must, oh, yes, I must' I tend to interrupt and tell her 'the only thing you must (do) is to search yourself and find what you want'.

b.

[Mimsy]

Originally Posted by barnakiel

Now I like the above drift. I too think there is virtue in perseverance AND then again there is virtue in giving up too (much as we might have been taught otherwise at school).

We jump to call people quitters but how do we know how much wisdom or gut it takes to quit?

When I see my student mumbling 'I must, oh, yes, I must' I tend to interrupt and tell her 'the only thing you must (do) is to search yourself and find what you want'.

b.

Well said! Just having the courage to attempt something-anything "out of the norm" is worthy of admiration. I would rather try to do soemthing different and fail than to try nothing daring and live my entire life as a sheeple.

[sailorboy1]

It would seem that you are smart to stop anything once you realize it's a mistake for you! Not quitting would indicate that you're an idiot!

So once you say to yourself I don't really like cruising............quit doing it!

[Hudson Force]

Nancie and I woke at one of our favorite anchorages in the St. Johns River, Florida, to find a 40+ Catalina anchored disturbingly close with no one aboard. After moving our own boat, we later dinghied ashore and heard the news form a broker at the marina. The owners of the Catalina had purchased the boat just a month earlier in St. Petersburg. After anchoring without a dinghy they literally jumped ship, swam to shore and left a note on the broker's door to sell the boat.

[SaltyMonkey]

Originally Posted by CaptForce

...a 40+ Catalina...and left a note on the broker's door to sell the boat.

Hmmm...interesting....I wonder if this is a correlation to manufacturers? Do you think Beneteau owners quit sooner than say, Najad or Oyster?

[CharlieJ]

We pitched it all for a trial retirement when in our early fifties. Both of us had high paying, high stress jobs and our friends said "Are you nuts?".

We went into the whole experience as a team...she conns the boat while I handle the lines, anchor, etc. No yelling. We lived aboard thirteen years, cruised the Eastern Caribbean for 3+ years. Jobs on board divided into pink and blue categories with cross training encouraged. We had a unique and solid relationship going into the experience, and a unique, solid and stronger relationship at the end of the experience. We watched many cruisers operate with an inexperienced male bossing and blustering an out of her element female with the relationship subsequently dissolved by sea water.

This whole thing is not for the faint of heart and as ReMetau (Hi, Don) says, "...a boat won't fix it".

Charlie

[aquarian]

Originally Posted by CharlieJ

We pitched it all for a trial retirement when in our early fifties. Both of us had high paying, high stress jobs and our friends said "Are you nuts?".

We went into the whole experience as a team...she conns the boat while I handle the lines, anchor, etc. No yelling. We lived aboard thirteen years, cruised the Eastern Caribbean for 3+ years. Jobs on board divided into pink and blue categories with cross training encouraged. We had a unique and solid relationship going into the experience, and a unique, solid and stronger relationship at the end of the experience. We watched many cruisers operate with an inexperienced male bossing and blustering an out of her element female with the relationship subsequently dissolved by sea water.

This whole thing is not for the faint of heart and as ReMetau (Hi, Don) says, "...a boat won't fix it".

Charlie

Wow, it can happen. You are so fortunate, and thanks for letting those of us who thought it couldn't know that it can. I want a relationship like that - one day.