Keeping CF pleasant

[garyfdl]

Originally Posted by Gadagirl

(That was not meant as a challenge!)

Originally Posted by Gadagirl

I grew up in NJ! Where passionate arguments were almost considered a bonding ritual!

ROFL Didn't grow up in Jersy, but cut but 'business teeth' there; it was almost a contact sport... OK sometimes it was a contact sport.

[Calif.Ted]

Originally Posted by sailorboy1

Books

Or Real long stories on your electronic reader.

[kmacdonald]

Just follow my lead. Loved by everyone.

[redneckrob]

Originally Posted by Gadagirl

I really enjoy and appreciate CF. I'm guilty of of getting a little too "passionate" at times. I've learned to conciciously tamp those moments down. I now avoid "taking the bait" as much as possible. (That was not meant as a challenge!)

I have learned so much here, not just boat related, but perspective and human nature and all that entails. I enjoy the diversity. And it's true, I might not agree with some people on some things, but those same people give great advice on other topics.

I have no one blocked.

C'mon, I grew up in NJ! Where passionate arguments were almost considered a bonding ritual!

There's always Sailing Anarchy if you want to get it out of your system. At least they warn you right in the name!

[grantmc]

Originally Posted by gonesail

I guess I don't get it. Life is not always pleasant and harmless. Why should the cruisers forum always be forced to play softball? After all it is a hard ball world isn't it? Yeh I know .. rules are rules

I agree. I enjoy the diversity an welcome the alternative views. And at the same time I always try to differentiate the person from their post. A post is simply in the moment, and we're not privy to what is happening in the background of their lives.

Take the poor sod that ran in to a bridge the other day. He'll/she'll be feeling most anxious I'm sure and any posts are probably going to be somewhat blinkered.

And this is an International forum with a very North American bias. I accept that, whilst it occasionally frustrates me.

Originally Posted by boatman61

That's what the Thanks button does.. it say's you liked the post..
Addendums are not obligatory but are sometimes nice to get and give that 'warm fuzzy' you refer to..
As for Likes/Thanks, that's easy enough to find totals of members helpfulness, click on their name and check the Green bar.
Why the need for folk to see how 'warm and fuzzy' you are in the moment..

I do thanks for standout posts, and usually include a message. One negative is that in clicking the thank you button, the popup is often obliterated by the advert, so it's actually quite difficult. And its a pathetic little single line of a very limited number of characters (50) visible. Scrolling can make that worse, depends on the advert. It should be (in my view) a textarea rather than a text html item.

I'd never before noticed a green bar, and as an aside am disappointed I only have a couple of green dots. I can't help but wonder too how many members have my account on their ignore list. Ouch. Again, something I'd no idea was a feature (that I'll never use, ie. ignore). Grief I'm almost feeling a serious threat to my masculinity in that perhaps I should read the CF manual.

Originally Posted by Mike OReilly

Completely agree . I never say anything online that I wouldn't say in the real world. And I take responsibility for my words, which is partly why I post under my actual name. I think this comes from my life as a journalist and writer.

And I agree with Mike's sentiment and mostly follow it. But like anyone sharing views, I do sometimes put my foot right in it, and say stupid, or ill considered, or make unintended offensive remarks. We're mostly all human here, and so let's forgive for minor transgressions.

[wolfgal]

I've been out of the loop for a few months (mostly) so have not noted the recent changes.

However, as far as "keeping CF pleasant" goes, I've really and truly appreciated it when CF folk step in, on my behalf, with cordial but firm perspectives, when I get taken down by someone with some kind of unfair attitude, usually that stereotyped attitude about women.

I've taken note when these responses to the unfair poster occurs over the last... seven years...? And, really and truly, appreciate it when it happens. Reacting to these posters has made me feel welcome (and yes, otherwise, I might be long gone).

I'd like to thank those of you who step up to the plate and make that feeling-of-belonging possible. You truly have merit.

[GordMay]

[Mike OReilly]

Originally Posted by grantmc

I do thanks for standout posts, and usually include a message. One negative is that in clicking the thank you button, the popup is often obliterated by the advert, so it's actually quite difficult. And its a pathetic little single line of a very limited number of characters (50) visible. Scrolling can make that worse, depends on the advert. It should be (in my view) a textarea rather than a text html item.

It's true, the "Thanks" text line is quite limited. Forces one to be pithy . I use adblock so never see any unwanted ads here. I highly recommend it -- makes the whole WWW a lot more palatable.

Originally Posted by grantmc

I'd never before noticed a green bar, and as an aside am disappointed I only have a couple of green dots. I can't help but wonder too how many members have my account on their ignore list. Ouch. Again, something I'd no idea was a feature (that I'll never use, ie. ignore). Grief I'm almost feeling a serious threat to my masculinity in that perhaps I should read the CF manual.

Yes, few people would ever notice the green dots since it's so well buried. It's too bad the forum chooses to display the star rating up front (which just indicates the number of posts one has made) instead of this green dot rating.

Originally Posted by grantmc

And I agree with Mike's sentiment and mostly follow it. But like anyone sharing views, I do sometimes put my foot right in it, and say stupid, or ill considered, or make unintended offensive remarks. We're mostly all human here, and so let's forgive for minor transgressions.

Well put. We all slip up sometimes. I can get drawn into stupid arguments, and sometimes let frustration get the better of me. I've apologized more than a few times when I've stepped over the line, or just said something stupid. All part of being human.

[garyfdl]

Originally Posted by grantmc

I agree. I enjoy the diversity an welcome the alternative views. And at the same time I always try to differentiate the person from their post. A post is simply in the moment, and we're not privy to what is happening in the background of their lives.

Take the poor sod that ran in to a bridge the other day. He'll/she'll be feeling most anxious I'm sure and any posts are probably going to be somewhat blinkered.

And this is an International forum with a very North American bias. I accept that, whilst it occasionally frustrates me.



I do thanks for standout posts, and usually include a message. One negative is that in clicking the thank you button, the popup is often obliterated by the advert, so it's actually quite difficult. And its a pathetic little single line of a very limited number of characters (50) visible. Scrolling can make that worse, depends on the advert. It should be (in my view) a textarea rather than a text html item.

I'd never before noticed a green bar, and as an aside am disappointed I only have a couple of green dots. I can't help but wonder too how many members have my account on their ignore list. Ouch. Again, something I'd no idea was a feature (that I'll never use, ie. ignore). Grief I'm almost feeling a serious threat to my masculinity in that perhaps I should read the CF manual.



And I agree with Mike's sentiment and mostly follow it. But like anyone sharing views, I do sometimes put my foot right in it, and say stupid, or ill considered, or make unintended offensive remarks. We're mostly all human here, and so let's forgive for minor transgressions.

[GordMay]

Although discussing verbal conversation, the principles described in the following article, can be adapted to written [on line] discussions:

“What Great Listeners Actually Do” [six levels of listening] ~ by Jack Zenger and Joseph Folkman
➥ https://hbr.org/2016/07/what-great-l...rs-actually-do

[garyfdl]

Originally Posted by GordMay

Although discussing verbal conversation, the principles described in the following article, can be adapted to written [on line] discussions:

“What Great Listeners Actually Do” [six levels of listening] ~ by Jack Zenger and Joseph Folkman
➥ https://hbr.org/2016/07/what-great-l...rs-actually-do

[Lake-Effect]

More lessons on listening - again mostly oriented towards in-person communication, but with lessons for all forms of discussion.

“Listening is being able to be changed by the other person.”
– Alan Alda

[Bullshooter]

"Say only that which you would blast out to the entire marina through a bullhorn, or say to someone's face, having walked up to them on the dock."

As Roy D. Mercer used to say, "How big'a boy are ya?"

[DMF Sailing]

Originally Posted by Bullshooter

"Say only that which you would blast out to the entire marina through a bullhorn, or say to someone's face, having walked up to them on the dock."

As Roy D. Mercer used to say, "How big'a boy are ya?"

Average height, size, and weight. Above average tolerance and willingness to get along. Especially with other sailors in a harbor.

Returning to the context of my statement: It only takes a very, very little boy to blast big boy things in an internet forum. Dexterity of fingers and basic command of English are the only requirements.

[Lodesman]

Originally Posted by GordMay

Although discussing verbal conversation, the principles described in the following article, can be adapted to written [on line] discussions:

“What Great Listeners Actually Do” [six levels of listening] ~ by Jack Zenger and Joseph Folkman
➥ https://hbr.org/2016/07/what-great-l...rs-actually-do

You mean great listeners don't put someone on "ignore"?